twitchquotes:
乇乂ㄒ尺卂 ㄒ卄丨匚匚
twitch chat
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Copypasta jokes are not funny
twitchquotes:
Copypasta jokes are not funny. It’s annoying and incredibly irritating to me when I say something in chat because I would enjoy actual responses and I instead get my own words thrown back at me. Please don't just copy my messages and be original! Thank you!
twitch chat
I used to work at an abortion clinic
I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed:
• A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight
• A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor
• They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name)
• One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns
• The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man
• The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life"
• The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos
• The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy)
• During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free
NSFW
I sexually Identify as an the sun
twitchquotes:
I sexually Identify as an the sun. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of slamming hydrogen isotopes into each other to make helium & light and send it throught the galaxy. People say to me that a person being a star is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon inflate me with hydrogen and raise my temperature to over 6000 °C. From now on I want you guys to call me “Sol” and respect my right to give you vitamin D and probably sunburns. If you can’t accept me you’re a fusionphobe and need to check your astral privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
I sexually Identify as
New agent idea: Hog rider
New agent idea: Hog rider
As maney of you know, over the past few years of playeing this game almost everyone wants riot to add hog rider into valrant. I know the devlapers dont wana add Hog rider into valrant becuse hes got a Hammer and likes rideing on pigs which is OP IN reaal life. However, i Spent a lot of my time the past few minute to think of a way to make him Not op in valrant like Rana(Which hackers like to use). Here is my idea:
Hog rider design:
https://preview.redd.it/oemu1mzky2g61.jpg?width=1143&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d580b7c34983f32f178f65b9a86310db6bfde9cc
This is what hog rider would look like in valrant
Abilitys:
C (cost 238$ dolars) - Jumpeing ability. When you press this abilty, You can jump
Q(cost 192.82$ dollrars) - Hammer abilty. Press this abilty and you turn your Gun into a hamer. The hammer is like the knife except when You swinging the hamer at someone it looks Dangareous.
E (main abilitey. recharge every few Minutes)- Battle cry. When you press the E buton, your Micraphone is broadcast on the whole map so evrayone can hear you talkeing. Then your alowed to make batle cry noise like clash clans hog rider.
X (ultra abilty cost 4 ulltra orb)s - When you press ultra abilaity, all of Your team gets to ride hogs. This is good because The hog your rideing on gets friends and your team mates get hog rider. For example: Cifer and Brimestone can be rideing hogs when hog rider use the ultra
Pasive abilty: hog
Valorant
Statue for Hitler's assassin
Has anyone noticed this bullshit? It's honestly unfair how people like Churchill and Roosevelt got honoured for their leadership during WW2, but once you mention that Hitler's assassin should get honored as well, everybody fucking gets mad and starts calling you names. I cannot believe that people haven't honored Adolf in any way, shape or form for killing Hitler! I think one way we should honor Adolf is by building a giant statue of him in Berlin, the place where he killed Hitler by shooting him in the head, but the goddamn liberals aren't letting us do that! Instead, they claim that Adolf was "evil" and "a dictator", like bitch that's Hitler not Adolf you're mixing them up retard...