twitchquotes:
β οΈ ATTENTION β οΈ my dream is full of in chat, pls help me fulfill my dream 
β οΈ ATTENTION β οΈ my dream is full of
twitch chat
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Everyone knows the crowd are all paid actors
twitchquotes:
Everyone knows the crowd are all paid actors, but did you know the chat is all paid commenters too? I can prove it - all the other paid commenters in chat will also post this
twitch chat
My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer
Hey, quandale Pringle here,
My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer during work and he squeezed my hog so hard and wouldn't even stop after I banned him.
My brother Cornelius Bartholomew Anderson ringle got caught in an alberian twitch prime and bits scam and got sent to the gulag, but we've snuck him a Nokia 3310 in his ass with a spoon that he'll be using to plan a breakout with my cousin longsdale dimmsdimone slingle.
we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce
gf is prego
we like to get kinky anyways
one night things get particularly saucy
i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights
wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period
i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering
ohshitohshitohshitohshit
i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital
she's still bleeding everywhere
by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent
oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state
storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything
he takes one look at ther and says
"sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do"
"WHY THE FUCK NOT???"
"we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
Classic
Yuno Gasai
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Weebs
I can't believe it's already MLK eve
πI CAN'T πΆ BELIEVE IT'S ALREADY πMπL πK π π£ EVE!! TONIGHT π WE WILL GATHER πͺ WITH OUR FAMILIESβ€ NOT ONLY TO PRAYπ TO MLK πAND LET HIM KNOWπ¦π¦π¦ WHAT GIFTSπ WE WOULD πLIKE π TO RECEIVEπ ON MLK DAY π BUT TO REMEMBER π THAT MLKβ€ IS THE REAL REASON πΆ FOR π΅THE πΆ SEASONβ SEND THIS TO TEN OTHER TRUE MLK FANSπ― OR YOUR BROTHERS π AND SISTERSπ WILL BE FOREVER OPPRESSED π