[Copypasta] My son got kicked out of school

twitchquotes: My son got kicked out of school for letting a girl jerk him off in class. That's three schools now. Maybe teaching isn't for him. FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
August 2017
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Ok that’s enough, sell your items

twitchquotes: 📞 4Head Hello Rookie 📞 4Head KT here 📞 4Head Ok that’s enough, sell your items 📞 4Head
twitch chat
October 2018
Riot Games

League of Legends

She needs a man that can treat her right

twitchquotes: What the fuck man. I'm literally sitting here on the verge of tears. Slaving away in this dead end job saving up for the end of the month splash. I was this close. Maybe I should have done that overtime, if I could get her that money earlier I might have been able to convince her in the dono message. She needs a man that can treat her right, a man like me. I would open the car door for her EVERY TIME, I would pull out her chair at a restaurant, I would lay my twitch hoodie over puddles to protect her from the filth.
twitch chat
December 2020

Simps

Clash Royale chicken emote

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡖⠛⡲⠤⣀⢰⠋⠉⢱⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⠒⠛⠛⡶⠳⠇⠀⠑⣹⠀⠀⡰⠛⠛⠛⠛⠓⠲⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡎⠀⠀⠀⡔⠑⢄⡠⠐⠒⠣⢤⠊⠑⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⢧⣀⡎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢂⢀⣈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡄⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⠘⠀⠀⠋⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠠⣀⣀⡀⠔⡁⠀⠀⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠈⡖⠲⡋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠱⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠸⣀⢀⡰⠁⠀⠀⠀⣠⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣴⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⡾⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀
November 2021

Clash Royale

Masturbation Notice from school

MASTURBATION NOTICE It has come to our attention that students have been masturbating in the school bathrooms. Masturbating on school property is ILLEGAL and against school district policy The bathroom pipes are NOT designed to handle human discharge or anything other than your regular bathroom duties The excessive amounts of discharge build-up has caused a blockage in the pipes. Multiple pipes have become close to bursting due to the amount of excessive semen build-up. This will cost THOUSANDS of dollars coming from our funds to repair the damage caused by this Please masturbate in your own homes and at your own disposal If any discharge is discovered in the bathroom, it will be collected and analyzed to determine who it belongs to. If it is discovered that the discharge is yours, YOU will be fine $ 1,000 and be reported to proper authorities Thank you for your cooperation
March 2022

I think I'm addicted to settings

God, I fucking love the settings app. I can't stop fucking changing the text size and checking for the new system update. God, the little slider icon turns me on so much. Whenever there is a system update I cry because I can't go on settings again. My screen time shows 107 hours of settings a day, which isn't even fucking possible.
August 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing