[Copypasta] My son got kicked out of school

twitchquotes: My son got kicked out of school for letting a girl jerk him off in class. That's three schools now. Maybe teaching isn't for him. FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
August 2017
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Lieutenant Clitt Nippley of the Greek Army

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, this is lieutenant Clitt Nippley of the Greek Army. It has come to our attention that you've been 'BroFisting' many of our citizens against their will. If you continue this, I have full authority to launch a nuclear attack against you and your evil 5 dollar club. You've been warned.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Trolling my whole class with Among Us Part 2

So yesterday at lunch, I was about to eat with my friends from band when I realized that there was an empty seat at a table with some of the popular kids. I decided to take advantage of this opportunity to troll them, and perhaps befriend some of them. I sat at their table, and right as I sat down, I noticed that one of the kids (who happened to be black) was sitting above a vent. I yelled "Black is sus! He's on top of a vent!!" Everyone at the table looked up at me, but no one laughed (they probably didn't get the reference). I decided that I would try to get them to be familiar with it, so I asked "Do to guys wanna play some Among Us???" They were all dead silent (honestly they just didn't know how fun of a game it was). I slapped the middle of our table (to mimick the "emergency meeting" feature in Among Us), and I screamed "EMERGENCY MEETING!!!" Again, none of them laughed. One of them looked at me and said "Can you please sit somewhere else?" At this point, I realized that I had to make them laugh quickly, or I would blow my chance with them. I made the widest grin I could possibly make (Trying to mimick the "When the imposter is sus" meme) and I said "When the impoter is sus". I then tried to make a face that resembled the "Flushed" emoji (as part of the meme). However, I don't think any of them understood the reference. I then pulled up the among us theme song on Youtube and played it on full blast. At this point, everyone at my table was asking for me to leave, and their friend came back, who regularly sat in the chair I was sitting in. I went back to sit with my friends from band. However, I will forever remember the time I trolled ALL of the popular kids in my grade.
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

Muffet from Undertale

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–€β–€β–„β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘ β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–€ β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
March 2016

12 win cotten mitten pitten

twitchquotes: When Kripp gets a pitten its a 12 win cotton mitten pitten. He gets so smitten his donger becomes a biggen. Now his donger being a biggen while hes smitten wearing mittens, he can no longer fap to his winning arena pittens. Help Kripp with his biggen so spam this donger omission about Kripps pittens that is a 12 win cotton mitten pitten. No copy pasteritten.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

valorant is not csgo

twitchquotes: Valorant is not csgo Everywhere I go I see things like valorant vs csgo, which is harder, which is better, which is more competitive/fun, and its confusing, yes valorant is a tac shooter, and has similar mechanics, but this is just another example of what people did with overwatch vs tf2 especially on release, it was all pointless because overwatch ISNT tf2 and valorant ISNT csgo regardless of their similar mechanics, valorant requires immensly more teamwork, and has whacky tools csgo has never seen, like stim beacon, sage’s entire kit, cyphers entire kit, sovas entire kit, breach fault line and aftershock, and EVERYONES ultimate, its never been seen before in a tac shooter, valorant isnt better/worse, harder/easier, its different, and always will be
twitch chat
June 2021

Valorant

CSGO

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