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twitchquotes: Tπ•™π•šπ•€ π•šπ•€ 𝕒 π•€π•‘π•–π•”π•šπ•’π• 𝕑𝕣𝕠π•₯𝕖𝕔π•₯𝕖𝕕 π•—π• π•Ÿπ•₯. 𝕐𝕠𝕦 π•”π•’π•Ÿπ•Ÿπ• π•₯ 𝕔𝕠𝕑π•ͺ π•šπ•₯. 𝔾𝕠 𝕒𝕙𝕖𝕒𝕕, π•₯𝕣π•ͺ.
twitch chat
December 2017
I used to be a real ad
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Asmongold’s Defence for Brony Accusation

"Listen. Just because I know who Rainbow Dash is, and I know what Equestria is, and Princess Celestia is, and I- I know uh, other things about the thing too probably I- probably I think about it, I don't know - Just because I know that stuff - Pinkie Pie, yeah, the- I don't- Look, it- I- I'm not- no, sounds like you know the story- of course, LISTEN, what do they say, keep your friends close and your enemies closer guys, t- remember- remember how they say that? Wh-what do you- wait, there's nothing wrong with this, it's- it's- that's, SEE? Look guys, yeah, TRUE, TRUE, yep, and absolutely not, nope we're downvoting this one, no, nope nope nope, that's not true, sus-"
April 2022
Asmongold

Response to somebody correcting a grammar mistake

Give it up folks, einstein over here has something to say. What's that buddy? Wha- A grammatical error?!? WHAT?!? B... Bu... That can't be possible! Surely not! A GRAMMAR MISTAKE? IN MY SIGHT?!? What a great, absolute miracle that you and your 257 IQ Brain was here to correct it! Thank you! Have my grattitude, Actually, What's your cashapp? I'd like to give you 20$... Know what? While we're at it have the keys to my car. Actually, no, scratch that. Have the keys to my house, go watch my kids grow up and fuck my wife. Also, my Paypal username and password is: Ilikesmartazzes4 and 968386329. Go have fun. Thank you for your work.
May 2021

Kripparrian... this Bro Fist is for you

twitchquotes: As he raises his "Bro Fist" gently against his cam, I raise my donger against my cam. I feel how for that moment, Kripparrian and I become one. My donger starts to shake, and I close my eyes, letting out a small moan as our "Bro Fists" e-touches. "Kripparrian.. this Bro Fist is for you" I whisper to myself. Kreygasm
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

So my boyfriend loves to play dota 2

twitchquotes: So my boyfriend loves to play dota 2 and is very immersed in twitch culture and this has extended to his everyday conversation. It seems like he can't go one sentence without using one such twitch "meme", like "pogchamp", "omegalul", "monka s", "bible thump", or "monka giga". I am fine with him watching twitch and enjoying his video games but honestly it's quite embarassing when we are talking to someone in public and he just randomly busts out a twitch "meme". It's so cringey and all my friends think he's weird. And don't even get me started on the random japanese phrases (he's white...) I swear this sounds like a meme post but i promise this is my real life ;___;
twitch chat
November 2018

Kripp starts a salt mine

twitchquotes: As Kripp frantically tries to fix his router and internet issues. The stays dedicated and vigilante. After trying to fix these issues that arose at hand he finally came to realize that this was all worth nothing. He stopped fixing the issues and threw his computer out the window. He started up a Salt Mining company in the Himalayan mountains called Kripp Salt. He is starting a family and all is well. Thanks Kripp. BibleThump
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
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