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I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas
FeelsOkayMan
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Chat π β
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Classic
we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce
gf is prego
we like to get kinky anyways
one night things get particularly saucy
i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights
wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period
i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering
ohshitohshitohshitohshit
i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital
she's still bleeding everywhere
by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent
oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state
storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything
he takes one look at ther and says
"sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do"
"WHY THE FUCK NOT???"
"we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
Classic
Please wake up, we miss you
twitchquotes:
If youβre reading this, youβve been in coma for almost 20 years now. Weβre trying a new technique. We donβt know where this message will end up in your dream, but we hope it works. Please wake up, we miss you.
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Kripp
Classic
CTRL + W to activate mod status
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ββββββββββββββββββββββββ 
The broadcaster of this channel has promoted you to mod status. Please press the key combo CTRL + W on your keyboard to activate this.ββββββββββββββββββββββββ
The broadcaster of this channel has promoted you to mod status. Please press the key combo CTRL + W on your keyboard to activate this.ββββββββββββββββββββββββ
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Classic
UwU sentence deterioration
twitchquotes:
Imagine reading a post, but over the course of it the quality seems to deteriorate and it gets wose an wose, where the swenetence stwucture and gwammer rewerts to a pwoint of uttew non swence, an u jus dont wanna wead it anymwore (oΒ΄Οο½o) awd twa wol owdewl iws jus awfwul (Β΄ο½₯Οο½₯`)
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