[Copypasta] My son can be homer sexual

twitchquotes: My son ๐Ÿ‘ฆ๐Ÿป can be homer sexual ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ My daughter ๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿป can be lebanese ๐Ÿ‘ญ But I will NEVER โ€ผ๏ธ Raise a child ๐Ÿ‘ถ๐Ÿป who likes Jake and Logan Paul ๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿปโ€
twitch chat
January 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

cant understand how you have a popular stream

twitchquotes: cant understand how you have a popular stream. you keep saying โ€œi dont even know what im doingโ€ and it shows. youโ€™re strats... wait do you have any? doesnโ€™t seem like it. you just seem consistantly terrible. dunno why people watch you. youโ€™re not entertaining or educating or anything... just another garbage ARAM player... lost a potential watcher for... literally anyone else
twitch chat
September 2019

Buzz Lightyear action figure stuck in my ass

I currently have a Buzz Lightyear action figure stuck in my ass. I am male if it matters. I've always been into putting things in my ass I don't know why, I'm not gay or anything I just like how it feels. Well I got drunk last night and decided to play with my ass and I hadn't gone shopping so I was out of carrots and cucumbers so I looked around and I saw my Buzz Lightyear action figure and thought "why not?" I've put action figures up there before because they feel different and it's funny. I grabbed Buzz, lubed him up and put him up against my asshole and started sliding him in. "To infinity and beyond!" I moaned as Buzz entered me. The only problem is that he has those wings that expand and so they popped open nearly splitting me in half and now he's stuck in there and I can't get him out. I know I need to go to the emergency room but honestly I'm scared and ashamed. I've managed to hide it from my wife so far but I think she's getting suspicious and can tell something is wrong. I'm going to try to sneak to the ER later and hopefully get it taken care of without her finding out.
July 2022

Confessions

if doublelift has million number of fans i am one of them

twitchquotes: if doublelift has million number of fans i am one of them. if doublelift has ten fans i am one of them. if doublelift has no fans. that means i am no more on the earth. if world against doublelift, i am against the world. i love doublelift till my last breath... die hard fan of doublelift. Hit like if u think doublelift best & smart in the world
twitch chat
June 2019

Classic

League of Legends

We donโ€™t have any words

twitchquotes: We donโ€™t have any words and we know you donโ€™t want to hear them. We understand your anger, your frustration, your sadness. Everything youโ€™re feeling โ€“ we get it. This isnโ€™t the ending we imagined, and certainly not the one we wanted. Thank you for being there the entire way.
twitch chat
April 2019

I'm significantly more attractive and more interesting than you

twitchquotes: I'm significantly more attractive and more interesting than you, and so is my girlfriend. Your girlfriend is very ugly. And so are you. These are facts. Debate me.
twitch chat
July 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing