[Copypasta] My son can be homer sexual

twitchquotes: My son ๐Ÿ‘ฆ๐Ÿป can be homer sexual ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ My daughter ๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿป can be lebanese ๐Ÿ‘ญ But I will NEVER โ€ผ๏ธ Raise a child ๐Ÿ‘ถ๐Ÿป who likes Jake and Logan Paul ๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿปโ€
twitch chat
January 2018
I used to be a real ad
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Stop calling slabs "half-slabs," you fucking imbeciles.

Stop calling slabs "half-slabs," you fucking imbeciles. A slab is half a block. If you say "half-slab," you're literally saying "half half block," or in other words, "quarter-block." A slab is not a quarter of a block. It is a half of a block. There is no such thing as a quarter block.
August 2021

Minecraft

My son won't stop using "TwitchSpeak?

My son (14) watches a lot of video game streamers on Twitch.tv. I personally don't find them entertaining but I can understand why some people (like my son) do. Over the past month he's starting using terms like "pog", "jabaited", and "Kappa" which I guess are terms that are used in the scope of Twitch. I don't have an issue with my son using these terms but it's gotten to the point where every sentence is Twitchspeak. We were having dinner and my daughter (age 12) was talking about how she got accepted for a summer program with the local animal shelter, and my son said "Pog you, easy clap". I told him that it was getting out of hand and that he would have to communicate normally to his parents and family. To that he said "Weird champ, feels weird man, normies omega LOL." Until he learns to communicate like a normal human being I've blacklisted Twitch from the internet for the time being. He's hysterical now but I told him that I would unblacklist it if he stopped using twitchspeak, but he's refusing to stop so for now it's banned. AITA?
May 2019

Classic

Am I The Asshole?

Trollge from Typical Colors 2

โขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃญโ นโ ›โ ›โ ›โขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโฃฟโ ทโ ถโ ฟโขปโฃฟโฃ›โฃฆโฃ™โ ปโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโขฟโฃฟโ โ €โ €โก€โ €โ ˆโฃฟโข›โฃฝโฃœโ ฏโฃฝโ €โ €โ €โ €โ ™โขฟโฃทโฃปโก€โขฟ โ โ ›โขฟโฃพโฃ–โฃคโก€โ €โข€โกฐโ ฟโขทโฃถโฃฟโก‡โ ปโฃ–โฃ’โฃ’โฃถโฃฟโฃฟโกŸโข™โฃถโฃฎ โฃคโ €โ €โ ›โ ปโ —โ ฟโ ฟโฃฏโก†โฃฟโฃ›โฃฟโกฟโ ฟโ ฎโกถโ ผโ Ÿโ ™โ Šโ โ €โ ธโขฃโฃฟ โฃฟโฃทโก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ  โ ญโฃโก‰โขฉโฃฅโกคโ ฅโฃคโกถโฃ’โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โขฐโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโกฝโก„โ €โ €โ €โขฟโฃฟโฃ†โฃฟโฃงโขกโฃพโฃฟโก‡โฃพโฃฟโก‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃฟโก‡โ ƒ โฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃปโฃ†โข„โ €โ ˆโ ‰โ ‰โ ›โ ›โ ˜โ ›โ ›โ ›โ ™โ ›โ โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃฟโก‡โขธ โขžโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃโฃทโฃโ ฆโก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โก€โข€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ›โฃฟโ ˆ โฃฆโก‘โ ›โฃŸโขฟโกฟโฃฟโฃทโฃโขงโก€โ €โ €โฃถโฃธโก‡โฃฟโขธโฃงโ €โ €โ €โ €โขธโกฟโก† โฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃฎโฃญโฃโก›โ ปโขฟโฃทโ ฟโฃถโฃถโฃฌโฃฌโฃโฃ‰โฃ€โฃ€โฃโกคโขดโฃบโฃพโฃฝโก‡
ascii art
July 2022

Kirby with gun

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–‘ โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘ โ–„โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
October 2018

You see this fictional character?

twitchquotes: You see this fictional character? I'm not afraid to admit that I've lost liters of cum to this character of mere fantasy. Isn't it funny how not even real women arouse me like she does? I have killed millions of my offspring to the thought of having an intercourse with a cartoon
twitch chat
April 2019

Weebs

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