[Copypasta] It's funny seeing the minds in chat

twitchquotes: It's funny seeing the "minds" in chat entertained by a virtual children’s card game. 🤣 Whenever you idiots “Pog Champ,” I am reading the works of Plato, etc. Guess who will get a better job in 5 years?
twitch chat
March 2018

Classic

Hearthstone

I used to be a real ad
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Natalie Portman is the reason I work out

Natalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink. "Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Natalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave. Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette. "Got a spare?" she asks. "What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles. "Conversation with me, duh." I laugh. "What's so funny?" she protests. "Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?" "You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter. "What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask. "Teaching, I think." "And if I was your student, what would I be learning?" "Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?" "Bermuda," I say. "Oh wow. That's lovely." "It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking." "What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires. "I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."
January 2021

Classic

Gay chicken

twitchquotes: In high school, I was dared to play "gay chicken", which is where two straight guys pretend to be gay, and the first one to chicken out loses. The other guy and I are both really stubborn, and neither one of us wanted to lose. We've been married 14 years and we run a bed and breakfast in Vermont with out adopted daughter. If that dude doesn't chicken out soon, I'm going to start to suspect that he's actually gay
twitch chat
September 2019

Classic

KappaPride

Kripp play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go!

twitchquotes: Privyet, Komrade Kripp! Is your cousin Dmitri from Mother Russia! I am of hearing that you make much moneys by playing simplistic card game for toddlers and whining like little baby in front of thousands of simpletons! BLYAT! You should play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go! Already I am recruit by man with enormous forehead for professional team Tampon Storm and will be winning many tournaments, yes! Don't be a cyka, you capitalist pig, and stop crying like baby! Love, Dmitri.
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

UNO reverse

⠐⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠂ ⠄⠄⣰⣾⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣆⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⡀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠋⣉⣉⣉⡉⠙⠻⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣇⠔⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⢉⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠹⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⠃⠄⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⠟⢁⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⡿⠁⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠗⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⡿⠁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⣠⣄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⡿⠁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⢀⡴⠚⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢠⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠃⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⠴⠋⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢀⣾⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠈⠁⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢀⣾⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⢀⣾⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⢁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⠗⠄⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣆⠈⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⣉⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠠⠺⣷⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣦⣄⣈⣉⣉⣉⣡⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠁⣀⣼⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⡿⠟⠄⠄ ⠠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
ascii art
February 2019

Classic

NaM octopus

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣵⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⠙⢾⢽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢸⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣶⣿⣿⣇⡀⠄⠄⠩⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠭⣿⣿⣿⣯⠭⣄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡅⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣐⣀⡘⠹⣿⣐⣤⣼⡄⠈⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠄⠄⠄⠰⣿⣿⠃⢨⣏⣻⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣦⠄⡄⣿⠛⠄⠠⢥⠛⢿⣿⡇⢼⣣⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⣣⡶⠬⡛⠛⠃⠙⠉⠄⡀⣤⣳⣶⢘⡡⠴⣾⣶⡦⠬⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⣠⡄⠄⠄⣀⣤⡶⠶⣶⣦⢤⣿⣿⢷⠃⡀⠄⠄⣀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣄⣀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠈⠙⠻⢾⢿⣬⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⢿⣯⣷⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠉⠉⠁⠄⠈⠙⢷⡄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠄⠁⠈⢉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣫⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⣷⣶⣄⢂⠄⠄⠄⣼⠇ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣴⡿⠟⢫⣿⡟⠞⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠻⣷⣍⠛⠛⠉⠄ ⠄⠄⣀⣀⣠⣠⣾⣟⣉⣤⣶⡿⠋⠄⠄⠘⢿⣷⣄⣀⣀⣀⡀⠄⠘⢿⣆⠄⠄⠄ ⢀⣾⠛⢛⡋⠉⠉⠉⠋⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⢷⣾⡉⠄⠄⠄ ⠘⢿⣤⡟⠁⠄⠐⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡴⠄⠁⢻⣷⠄⠄⠄ ⢐⢀⠟⠒⠘⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢳⣄⣠⡾⠃⠄⠄⠄ ⠈⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
ascii art
July 2019

Classic

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