[Copypasta] Now THAT is what I call RUSSIAN MEDDLING!

twitchquotes: Had a colonoscopy today. My doctor was actually Russian. Now THAT is what I call RUSSIAN MEDDLING! They put me to sleep w/ same stuff Michael Jackon used. When I woke up, I MOON-walked right out of the hospital!
twitch chat
June 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

As Jeff Kaplan stares at me through my computer screen

twitchquotes: As Jeff Kaplan stares at me through my computer screen, I begin to contemplate reality. What truly has substance in this realm of technology, avarice and sin? What is our future, if not a blank, hollow nothing, rife with silence and strife? PogChamp
twitch chat
January 2018

Overwatch

Holy shit! You identify as an attack helicopter?

Holy shit! You identify as an attack helicopter? I’ve never heard that joke before, but it’s so genius! You sir, or madame, or helicopter, are the absolute most hilarious and original person I have ever seen in my entire life. Move over, Jerry Seinfeld. Get lost, Brian Regan. Out of the way, Family Guy Funny Moments Compilation #53. There’s a new funniest man in town. Holy shit, I just can’t get over this joke. I’m giggling and guffawing harder than ever before. You should win an Oscar and an Emmy and a Grammy and a Nickelodeon Kid’s Choice Award. Attack helicopter gender! Wow! So funny! Take that, liberals! Haha. Every night since I was born I have looked up to the plastic glow-in-the-dark stars on my ceiling and wondered, “I hope one day I can be as funny as the attack helicopter gender guy.” I will tell my children, and my children’s children, all about the absolute hilarity that went down just now. You just broke the Guinness World Record for funniest and most original jokester on the planet. I’m fucking simultaneously shitting and cumming because this joke is just so funny. Holy shit. That was an amazing joke, my guy. I’m gonna make a subreddit dedicated entirely to this one joke. It’s gonna get thousands of members! History books will forever remember the time you said, “I identify as an attack helicopter.” It’ll go right there in the important quote book, right between Patrick Henry and Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. I just can’t believe I was here to witness such grandeur. I was here! I think I’m going to make a whole religion based on worshipping you, my glorious and hilarious attack helicopter God. This is just so funny I can’t believe it! Hahahahahahahahahaha! I think I’m going to go to the hospital and fucking die from laughing to hard, but that’s okay! This is even funnier than that guy who said he identified as a toaster! Can you believe it? I never thought that very different joke could be topped, but here we are! Did I mention how funny and original that joke was? Ah, well done, sir, or madame, or helicopter. This is an experience I won’t forget any time soon. Ha. Haha. Ha. Lol. Lmao. Haha. Jajaja. Lmfao. Rofl, rotfl, ha.
June 2021

forsenFeels

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡼⣱⢯⢾⡭⣒⣩⠖⢊⣁⡯⠭⠥⠬⠽⢈⠳⣳⡰⡝⣶⡀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣉⣄⠿⣻⣽⣷⣚⠭⠄⡿⠺⠭⠭⣭⡷⠙⢆⠹⢸⠈⣿⡄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿⡟⠉⠄⣴⡏⡉⡯⠃⢀⣿⠧⠶⣯⡱⡝⠝⠂⠈⠄⠄⠄⠘⠈⣆ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⠧⢤⡀⠿⢿⠁⠄⣠⠄⡐⣠⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⡀⠄⠄⡴⠋ ⠄⠄⠄⡠⢼⡓⣄⠢⡑⠄⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⡸⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⡜⠷⠆⢰⠘⡆⠑⠃⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄ ⠄⠰⡁⠄⢀⢸⠄⠇⠄⣺⣿⣿⣿⡦⠄⠠⠬⠭⠉⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠴⠊⠱⣀⣀⡉⠁⠄⢰⣿⣿⢋⣴⣿⣦⣌⠳⣋⡄⠄⣾⢋⡀⠤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣷⠂⣿⣿⣿⣷⣝⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣼⣿⣆⣙⣠⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⡏⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⡶⢶⣶⣇⣿⣿⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⣛⣋⡁⠚⠄⠨⢥⣿⠋⢲⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⣠⠼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠸⠿⡋⢠⣶⡦⣨⣙⣛⢋⠜⣁⣀⡀⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠊⢸⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠉⣐⢤⢻⣧⣀⣬⡾⢋⣾⣿⣿⣿⠥⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢸⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⠄⠄⠐⣸⡷⠿⠃⠄⠄⠻⠿⠿⠋⠄⡘⠤⡀⠄⠄ ⠄⢸⠄⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⢠⠟⠄⡆⠰⠄⢇⠄⡼⠄⢠⢂⡎⢠⠃⣀⠱⡀⠄
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

You've been visited by Hellbear Smasher of fortune

twitchquotes: ʕ ͡·ᴥ ͡· ʔ You've been visited by Hellbear Smasher of fortune. Clap your paws and copy paste this message 5 times without getting banned by mods and luck be with you for the next year ʕ ͡·ᴥ ͡· ʔ
twitch chat
August 2014

THE WRONG DONGERHOOD

twitchquotes: ༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ YOU CAME TO THE WRONG DONGERHOOD ༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽
twitch chat
March 2016

Classic

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