[Copypasta] Things escalated from there

twitchquotes: I lost my virginity while listening to this song 5 years ago, it's a funny story really.. i had just finished my gym workout and i was in the locker room all sweaty, and in walks this leather dressed jabroni.. he seemed confused as to where he was.. i told him he might have gotten the wrong door, then he got very rude and said "fuck you", then i said "nah fuck you leatherman" and then things escalated from there
twitch chat
July 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

My e-girl e-cheated on me

twitchquotes: My e-girl e-cheated on me after an entire e-day of e-dating and now I'm e-sad. On another e-note, e-girls please send in your e-resumes, I am currently looking to e-fill an e-position.
twitch chat
March 2019

I love Carl from Brawl Stars

Guys, I’m literally detecting seismic activity. I never wanted to rock with anyone more than I want to with Carl. That perfect, chiseled body. Those bountiful hills. The majestic mountains of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never rock with him, pass my sediment through him, and have him birth a set of perfect hot springs. I'd do fricking ANYTHING for the chance to get Carl’s rocks off. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fricking bear. Why would Supercell create something so perfect? To fricking tantalize us? Fricking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fricking can't anymore. Frick.
December 2020

Unrealized losses

She runs her hand through your thinning hair and laughs. “What?” you ask absentmindedly. You’re looking at Futures, and you’re surprised to see them red. “I want you to play with me.” She says it playfully, but the single ounce of you that isn’t totally aloof realizes she said this in earnest. And so you do. You throw your phone, and you pin her to the sofa, then the ground. You both roll about, wrestling, like lion cubs. Kissing, lightly biting. Sometime later, you both stop, breathing hard. She grabs an open bottle of red wine, and you pass it back and forth. Eventually she says, “I want to do that more.” But you’ve already found your phone again to check Futures. Still red. “Uh huh,” you say, distracted. She stares at you for a long moment, but you don’t realize it. Silently, she gets up and goes to bed, and you don’t say a word because you don’t notice. She hasn’t left you yet, but she will soon. Unrealized losses.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Is buttcheeks one word

twitchquotes: Is buttcheeks one word, or shall I spread them apart?
twitch chat
June 2020

I’M NOT BEGGING FOR AN ALL ACCESS PASS

twitchquotes: “I’M NOT BEGGING FOR AN ALL ACCESS PASS. I’M SIMPLY ASKING MULTIPLE STRANGERS MANY TIMES TO SPEND $15 ON ME” LUL
twitch chat
May 2019
OverwatchLeague
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