[Copypasta] Homo Sapiens

twitchquotes: When I was 12 yrs old, a male friend asked me if I was Homosexual or Heterosexual. I didn't know what either meant, but I did know we were called Homo Sapiens. So I said I was Homosexual. He laughed at me. He then explained the difference and then I said I must be heterosexual because I had sex with his mom.
twitch chat
July 2018
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More Copypastas

Among Us teaches us to punish minorities

Among Us (coloquially termed "amogus") teaches us to punish the minority and hate those who are different and unique as "impostors." Instead, I like the breath of fresh air this problem provides as a new perspective on deduction that is not "red is sus, red vented, etc." that has been dominating the jokes of my peers and the view of my feed. Yet, by trying to force this problem to conform to "amogus," you yourself are trying to crush originality and uniqueness. Among Us is a game ultimately convincing us to conform to menial labor as "tasks" and accept the deal of being just like the rest of the crewmates.
October 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Ninja's wife and xqc's twitter feud

twitchquotes: Of course ๐Ÿค— I was going to answer๐Ÿ‘ฎโ€โ™‚๏ธ sweetie , ๐Ÿฅฐ I was eating breakfast๐Ÿง‡, fueling up for a productive day ๐Ÿ’… Not very relatable ๐Ÿคจ I know! ๐Ÿ˜ผ You should teach me a thing ๐Ÿ˜— or 2โœŒ about fundraisers ๐Ÿ—ฃ๐Ÿ’ต i'm sure you know a thing or two โœŒ about raising funds. ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคช I mean, these gucci ๐Ÿ bags don't pay for themselves. ๐Ÿ™Œ ๐Ÿฆ
twitch chat
July 2020
xQcOW

Penis Inspection Day

twitchquotes: I was talking to some people I know, and apparently I'm the only person who remembers "Penis Inspection Day" in Elementary School. The gym teacher took us into the washroom one at a time while everyone else kept playing, and tugged our foreskin back and inspected our penis to make sure we were developing properly and keeping clean. Surely I can't be the only one who remembers this, other people must have had Penis Inspection Day at their school too.
twitch chat
December 2019

Last night I shoved live gerbils in my ass for the first time. AMA

July 2022

Confessions

She needs a man that can treat her right

twitchquotes: What the fuck man. I'm literally sitting here on the verge of tears. Slaving away in this dead end job saving up for the end of the month splash. I was this close. Maybe I should have done that overtime, if I could get her that money earlier I might have been able to convince her in the dono message. She needs a man that can treat her right, a man like me. I would open the car door for her EVERY TIME, I would pull out her chair at a restaurant, I would lay my twitch hoodie over puddles to protect her from the filth.
twitch chat
December 2020

Simps

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