[Copypasta] Homo Sapiens

twitchquotes: When I was 12 yrs old, a male friend asked me if I was Homosexual or Heterosexual. I didn't know what either meant, but I did know we were called Homo Sapiens. So I said I was Homosexual. He laughed at me. He then explained the difference and then I said I must be heterosexual because I had sex with his mom.
twitch chat
July 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

A casual player like yourself might get injured!

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, Mike Morhaime, President of Blizzard Entertainment here. I notice you're playing one of our older games. I have to warn you, the games we made in that era weren't casual-friendly. A casual player like yourself might get injured!
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Jared returns home from North Korea to Tobito

twitchquotes: The year is 2028, Jared returns home to Nantucket after serving his 3rd tour in North Korea. Victorious but broken, he exhales hard as he looks up to see his quaint house on the hill. It isn't until that his eyes take in the grace and beauty of Tobito Flatdickacini that he finds the will to continue living. That night they dined on rum and cheese by candlelight and reminisced of 2016. The time of Harambe, the quarrel they had that lead to JABITO, and their asexual child, Plankie. KappaPride
twitch chat
December 2016
Fate_Twisted_NA

League of Legends

5 men 9 eyebrows 1 dream

twitchquotes: This is Gambit ༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º( ͡° ͡ ͜ ͡ʖ ͡ °)ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ 5 MEN 9 EYEBROWS 1 DREAM
twitch chat
March 2014

Classic

League of Legends

Artosis is glad Kripp is a sellout like him

twitchquotes: ＷＥＬＬ ＭＥＴ ＫＲＩＰＰ， ＩＴ＇Ｓ ＭＥ ＡＲＴＯＳＩＳ． Ｉ＇Ｍ ＧＬＡＤ ＹＯＵ＇ＲＥ ＪＯＩＮＩＮＧ ＴＨＥ ＷＡＹ ＯＦ ＴＨＥ ＳＥＬＬＯＵＴ． ＣＯＮＴＩＮＵＥ ＢＥＩＮＧ Ａ ＣＡＳＵＡＬ ＳＥＬＬＯＵＴ ＬＩＫＥ ＭＥ ＡＮＤ ＹＯＵ＇ＬＬ ＧＲＯＷ ＩＮＴＯ Ａ ＪＥＷ ＮＯＳＥＤ ＧＡＭＥＲ ＪＡＣＫＥＴ ＳＥＬＬＯＵＴ
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

Singlee and ready to Minglee

twitchquotes: MingLee SINGLEE MingLee AND MingLee READY MingLee TO MingLee MINGLEE MingLee
twitch chat
November 2015

Classic

More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing