[Copypasta] Homo Sapiens

twitchquotes: When I was 12 yrs old, a male friend asked me if I was Homosexual or Heterosexual. I didn't know what either meant, but I did know we were called Homo Sapiens. So I said I was Homosexual. He laughed at me. He then explained the difference and then I said I must be heterosexual because I had sex with his mom.
twitch chat
July 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of seizing the means of production from the dirty bourgeoisie. People say to me that a person being a historical communist revolution is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon instal hammers, sickles, and other assorted proletariat farming tools on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Comrade" and respect my right to seize the means of production and free the working class. If you can't accept me you're an oppressor and need to check your capitalist privileges. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
June 2017

I sexually Identify as

What did you just say about my positions

twitchquotes: What the fuck did you just fucking say about my positions, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Wharton Business School, and I've been involved in numerous insider trades on Alibaba, and I have over 30,000% returns. I am trained in trading on margarine and I'm the top trader in the Bridgewater Associates. You are nothing to me but just another pump before I dump. I will wipe your gains the fuck out with swiftness the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my network of brokers across the USA and your brokerage account is being traced right now so you better prepare for red dildos, faggot. The dildos that wipe out the pathetic little thing you call tendies. You're fucking broke, kid. I can manipulate any stock, anytime, and I can bankrupt you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my market manipulation. Not only am I extensively trained in pumping and dumping, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the SEC and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable portfolio off the face of robinhood, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit red dildos all over you and you will drown in them. You're fucking broke, kiddo.
twitch chat
September 2020

Infected with the Dank Pasta Virus

twitchquotes: bᎽ ᏒᎬᎪᎠᎥᏁᎶ ᏆhᎥs mᎬssᎪᎶᎬ ᎽᎾu ᎪᏒᎬ ᏁᎾᎳ ᎥᏁfᎬᏟᏆᎬᎠ ᎳᎥᏆh ᏆhᎬ ᎠᎪᏁᏦ ᏢᎪsᏆᎪ ᏉᎥᏒus. ᏆᎾ ᎶᎬᏆ ᏒᎥᎠ Ꮎf ᏆhᎬ ᎠᎪᏁᏦ ᏢᎪsᏆᎪ ᏉᎥᏒus, ᎽᎾu musᏆ ᏢᎪss ᎥᏆ ᎾᏁ ᏆᎾ ᏆhᎬ ᏟhᎪT ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ I'm cured!!
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Response to Pokimane saying she's disgusted by cum tributes

Really tired of being treated like Public Enemy #1 sometimes. There are a lot worst things going on in the world than a bunch of guys whipping out their cocks and sharing pics and vids of them and our loads. Especially when a lot of us are some of your biggest fans and simps who wouldn't hurt a fly and are just showing support in our own way. Just leave me in peace when I've had a bad day, need a release and you helped me through it.
July 2022
Pokimane

The Manny Will Not Be Televised

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⠸⡆⣰⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢉⣹⣿⠧⢤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⠀⣠⠴⠶⠶⠆⠀⠟⣉⣍⡛⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⡏⠰⢇⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠿⣿⠷⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⢠⡞⠋⠉⠙⠗⠀⠰⠽⠿⠅⠀⠀⠘⠒⠚⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⣆⠀ ⢸⡇⠛⠙⠃⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡿⠀ ⠀⠙⠒⠒⢺⡇⠙⣝⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⢻⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠀⠀⠈⠙⠓⣶⣶⣶⢶⡶⠶⠶⠤⢤⠤⢤⠤⠤⠤⢴⠶⠚⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⠋⣀⣉⢙⣇⣀⣀⣀⣼⠀⠸⣄⣀⣀⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡀⢠⡞⠿⣽⡿⢉⡿⠋⣀⠉⡉⠻⣄⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠙⢦⡀⠷⢿⠀⣾⠁⣸⠃⡶⢘⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢧⣀⡈⠉⠉⢋⣙⣻⠵⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠛⠋⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Oop gotta sign a petition
July 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing