[Copypasta] Homo Sapiens

twitchquotes: When I was 12 yrs old, a male friend asked me if I was Homosexual or Heterosexual. I didn't know what either meant, but I did know we were called Homo Sapiens. So I said I was Homosexual. He laughed at me. He then explained the difference and then I said I must be heterosexual because I had sex with his mom.
twitch chat
July 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Soju Going 8th Checklist

GOING 8TH CHECKLIST: I already won the game βœ” This lobby’s playing for second βœ” This is my last loss βœ” I win out from here βœ” My board is too lit βœ” HP is fake βœ” I’m about to spike hard βœ” That’s a fake loss βœ” 20hp? That’s 3 lives βœ” This game is over βœ” We win out βœ”
July 2022
k3soju

Teamfight Tactics

Mr. K-Kripp, I charted your win rate for the last month

twitchquotes: monkaS πŸ‘‰ πŸ“‰ Um.... Mr. K-Kripp, I charted your win rate for the last month...
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

2 games 1 stream

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparrian, this is Twitch Staff. We have noticed that you are trying to become a hardcore player again, since you broke the laws of physics and play 2 games on 1 stream, when the laws of physics clearly says: "How can there be 2 games, when only 1 channel?". We hope that you will stop this, and become a casual player again. Please don't repost this. Thank you.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Spam so I may stay warm

twitchquotes: Hello chat. My home is very cold and I do not know if I will make it through the night. Whenever the chat spams, my old laptop heats up very quickly. It is the only thing keeping me alive. Please chat, spam as much as possible so I may stay warm and survive the frigid night.
twitch chat
June 2019

Dear Twitch Partners, Our community members are always our priority

twitchquotes: Dear πŸ‘‹ Twitch Partners 🀝 , Our πŸ‘‰ community members πŸ‘ͺ are always β˜‘οΈ our priority πŸ›‘. We received πŸ“₯ some reports ❗ describing ⌨️ the discomfort ☹️ some of our members πŸ—£οΈ felt after a Twitch Rivals 🀼 participant used "KE*W" and "mo*kaS," 😢 both emotes are often ⏲️ used in toxic πŸ’€ contexts. Please πŸ™ refrain from using such emotes, and use KEKHeim & CaitlynS instead πŸ‘. Best regards πŸ‘‹, Twitch Team πŸ’Œ
twitch chat
November 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing