[Copypasta] I donated $3

twitchquotes: Yo wtf. I donated $3 (my daily allowance from my parents) to play Lil Pump - ESSKEETIT (fav song) and he isn't playing it. Hello? Why is this chat allowing this streamer to get away with this? Why are you idiots just spamming your 'memes' instead of trying to get my song played? Fuck this. This is the last time I donate. I hope you spend your $3 wisely, jerk.
twitch chat
September 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

1 MIL MEDICAL BILL NA

twitchquotes: NA? KEKW GO TO STORE KEKW GET SHOT KEKW SURVIVE? KEKW 1 MIL MEDICAL BILL KEKW
twitch chat
September 2020

EU vs NA

It's not gay with socks on

When I was 13 years old a buddy of mine tried to convince me to fool around. I wasn't into it, and he told me it's not gay if you're wearing socks. I didn't believe him, went home, and asked my dad. That's 'gentleman's gay', hardly gay at all. Don't see it much these days. The 50s were a different time. What were we to do? We were typical boarding school boys, rich with vigor, skin slick with drying sweat and gritty earth from a game of pigskin. At night our young, virile bodies filled the dorm with sweet-musky vapors, like game-meat stewed with apple and peppercorn. You'd awake in darkness to the hushed, melodic rhythm of two pairs of white tube socks, barely visible in moonlight, bouncing on the hardwood floor. The deep bond of male friendship played like a thousand different human instruments. The wet claps of skin on skin, the gentle thud of heads on backboards, frenzied cries in the throes of climax. Wilbur, so fat and soft like tapioca pudding. His breasts were so like the real thing, what we fantasized of our future wives. Unwilling, defenseless Wilbur, so slow and uncoordinated in the dark. 10 of us would glaze his bare, pink flesh like a giant raspberry danish. He once had the audacity to tell Headmaster Redford. But Redford was a Deerfield boy once, he understood. So he joined us on our midnight hog hunts. Through college and years after we'd find time here and there, away from the wives at a family lake house. But it's been decades now - the times have certainly changed. If you wanted to do something private with another man, in your socks, it wasn’t ‘gay’. It was just two men, celebrating each other's strength.
August 2021

not an asexual thing

twitchquotes: ‘not an asexual thing’. try living a day in my shoes, walking around terrified of encountering sex everywhere i go. wherever i look, parents with children, people sucking each others’ faces. it makes me and millions of other aces out there feel really attacked.
twitch chat
February 2019

Classic

Chuck's Feeduck and Seeduck

The sign is a subtle joke. The shop is called "Sneed's Feed & Seed", where "feed" and "seed" both end in the sound "-eed", thus rhyming with the name of the owner, Sneed. The sign says that the shop was "Formerly Chuck's", implying that the two words beginning with "F" and "S" would have ended with "-uck", rhyming with "Chuck". So, when Chuck owned the shop, it would have been called "Chuck's Feeduck and Seeduck".
June 2021

This is a routine PokiW check

twitchquotes: Hello sir. Do you know why I've stopped you? You haven't done anything wrong. This is just a routine PokiW check, sir. May I see your Twitch sub badges and username, please? Thank you. Now let's see that PokiW, hmm? Go ahead, type it in chat. No funny business. Dot the I and capitalize the W. I better not see an emote, son. Or you're off to jail.
twitch chat
September 2021
Pokimane
Text-to-Speech Playing