[Copypasta] Todd Howard Fallout 76 announcement

twitchquotes: Hey, gamers. It's me, Todd Howard with an important announcement. Fallout 76 was all an early April Fools' joke. To help us release the REAL game, Fallout: New Vegas 2, all I need is your credit card number, the expiration month and year, and the three digits on the back.
twitch chat
November 2018
Fallout 76 was a huge flop on release. Massive PR backlash.
I used to be a real ad
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My husband of 5 years bought me Reddit Gold for my anniversary

My 5-Year anniversary with my husband was last week. The traditional gift for 5 years is silverware. I wanted a new set and told my husband which he could get me as a gift. I knew he wanted an Apple Watch and bought that as my gift to him. On the day of our anniversary, I logged onto Reddit to find dozens of my posts and comments guilded. I found it odd as I don’t post terribly often and the guilded comments were old. It’s also the first time I’ve received Reddit gold. When the time came to exchange gifts, he gleefully opened his Apple Watch and begin setting it up. I figured I’m all the excitement he forgot to give me my gift so I gently prodded him. He told me to check Reddit. Ladies and Gentlemen, my husband GUILDED me 24 times as an anniversary gift. He’s a bit of a jokester, so I figured my real gift was coming. But Reddit, it’s been a week. Do I say something? Buy the silverware myself? Some combination of the two? I feel if I don’t say something then the cycle will repeat itself.
September 2021

Reddit

Happy Thanksgiving emoji

Happy πŸ¦ƒ Thanksgiving πŸ¦ƒ! Guess what πŸ˜―β“it’s that time ⏰ of year πŸ—“ to gobble πŸ¦ƒ gobble πŸ¦ƒ gobble πŸ¦ƒ up ⬆️ those dicks πŸ† chicks πŸ₯ and bicks 🀨 (big dicks) πŸ†πŸ˜«πŸ˜«πŸ˜«πŸ˜« I bet 😏 you’re all 😀😀😀 HORNY-copia 🌽 πŸ₯”πŸ₯•πŸŒΆπŸ†β™‹οΈπŸ‘€πŸ‘‰πŸ‘Œ for SKANKS-giving πŸ€ͺπŸ˜”πŸ€€πŸ€€πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜πŸ˜ you’ll be saying πŸ’¬ thanks πŸ™ for giving me all 😫 this 😫 COCK πŸ₯³πŸ₯³πŸ₯³πŸ₯³ send this to πŸ”Ÿ of your thiccest sluts with those hot πŸ₯΅ hot πŸ”₯ tasty πŸ€€πŸ˜‹ peach pies πŸ₯§ πŸ‘ 😏😏 if you know πŸ€” what I mean β˜ΊοΈπŸ˜˜πŸ˜‹ if you get 1️⃣ back πŸ™„πŸ€¬πŸ˜‘ then you and that slut 🀀🀀🀀😫😫😫 have to appropriate Native American culture together πŸ˜”πŸͺΆπŸ• if you get 3️⃣ back πŸ˜ˆπŸ€‘ you’re going to get your turkey πŸ¦ƒ eaten πŸ˜‹πŸ˜‹πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‰πŸ˜ tomorrow night 😱😱😱😱 if you get 5️⃣ back πŸ‘€πŸ‘€ you will be eating your cousin’s πŸ‘ΆπŸ» peach πŸ‘ pie πŸ₯§ just like you’ve always πŸ’―πŸ’―πŸ’―wanted πŸ˜‹πŸ€€πŸ₯΅ if you get 7️⃣ back πŸ›Ά you’ll become 😲😲 a pilgrim πŸŽ©πŸ‘ž and be the villain πŸ¦Ήβ€β™€οΈ of American πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ history πŸ“–πŸ“•πŸ“š πŸ˜”πŸ˜”πŸ˜” if you get all 1️⃣0️⃣ back 🀯😱🀯😱🀯😱🀯 you’ll be feasting 🀀😏 this thanksgiving πŸ‘€πŸ‘€ in more ways than one πŸ˜«πŸ˜πŸ‘€πŸšΌπŸ’˜ okay you sexy πŸ˜‡ sexy 😈 gobbling turkey poos πŸ¦ƒπŸ¦ƒπŸ¦ƒ it’s time ⏰ for me to go ➑️ atone 🀣for the sins ✝️ πŸ˜”of my ancestorsπŸ’€πŸ’€πŸ’€πŸ‘©πŸΌβ€β€οΈβ€πŸ’‹β€πŸ‘¨πŸΌπŸ€°πŸΌπŸ€±πŸΌπŸ‘©β€πŸ‘§πŸ€ͺπŸ€ͺπŸ€ͺπŸ€ͺπŸ€ͺ
January 2024

Emoji Pasta

Holiday Emoji

Thanksgiving

Ninja Mixer announcement

twitchquotes: I know this may come as a shock to many of you, but, as of today, i will be streaming exclusively on Mixer. I know, i know, it's exciting. You know, i feel like this is a really good chance to get back in touch with my roots, and really remember why i fell in love with streaming in the first place.
twitch chat
August 2019
Ninja

British "person" (🀒) in Godzilla vs Kong

I can't believe it, one of this year's biggest movies and they added a bri'ish "person", it's a well known fact by now that the so called "British" and the entire country of "Britain" aren't even real things. Why would the director decide to ruin the realism, the immersion his audience should feel when watching a huge monke and lizard fighting, by adding one of these imaginary "individuals". I must admit I was excited for Gozdilla vs Kong when I first saw the trailer but now... I don't know what to feel. I don't know if I have the will to watch this movie and be able to enjoy it while there's a bri'ish person on my screen.
April 2021

British People

I saw Flying Lotus at a grocery store

twitchquotes: I saw Flying Lotus at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, β€œOh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was β€œHuh?” but he kept cutting me off and going β€œhuh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like β€œSir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually β€œto prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
twitch chat
November 2019
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