twitchquotes:
Two guys are in a boat with three cigarettes. They had no fire, so they threw one of the cigarettes overboard, and the entire boat became a cigarette lighter.
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What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
The tragedy of Darth Kripparian the Salty
twitchquotes:
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Kripparian the Salty? I thought not. It’s not a story the streamer would tell you. It’s a Salt legend. Darth Kripparian was a Dark Lord of the Salt, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create salt… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he couldn't even keep the cards he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be salty.
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Kripp
Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise
salty
We wub you Reynoodle. Give chat a kissy kiss.
Attention all Smash Bros Gamers
twitchquotes:
Attention all Smash Bros Gamers, Kirby is in great danger, and he needs YOUR help to save all the innocent characters murdered and possessed by Galeem. To do this, he needs a Warp Star and a couple of Maximum Tomatoes. To help him, all he needs is your credit card number, the three numbers on the back, and the expiration month and date. But you gotta be quick so that Kirby can secure the Spirits, and save billions of video game characters you know and love!
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Super Smash Bros
Helping us polish the in-game spectator feature
twitchquotes:
Hi Imaqtpie, this is Riot Games CEO Nicolo Laurent speaking. We want to thank you on behalf of the Valorant rage team for helping us polish the in-game spectator feature.
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imaqtpie
Valorant
Response to Navy Seal Copypasta
Did you just think that you could fucking fool me with that comment of yours? I've searched your name up in the Navy SEAL database and you have never even graduated BUD/S, hell, even served in the Armed Forces. If you were actually a Navy SEAL, then you actually know how to spell guerrilla, you fucking moron. And you say you are the top sniper in the entire US Armed Forces and have over 300 confirmed kills. If that were true, then why the fuck is Chris Kyle a household name and you aren't? And plus he only had 160 kills. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. Plus why the fuck would you say you have a secret network of spies yet you just revealed that you had your secret network of spies? Are you a fucking idiot? If you can kill someone seven-hundred different ways, then list them all, I bet you can't even come up with seven. And if you had access to the entire US Marine Corps arsenal, then why the fuck did you just say you were in the Navy SEALs earlier? If only you could have done your research prior to posting your little “clever” comment, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you goddamn idiot.