[Copypasta] 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks

twitchquotes: 4 people broke into my house and held me hostage last night. Somehow they've heard I hold 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks and wanted me to withdraw it to a specific bank account. I had to explain for 2 hours how it's all fake money and that I've spent almost a week trading fake stocks just to gain nothing. They ended up calling me a fucking loser and left..
twitch chat
March 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kindred

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣠⣴⣦⣼⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⡆⠀⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⢳⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠦⢤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠥⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣄⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠀⠀⠈⠛⢿⣿⠿⠋⠁⢀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠒⠀⢠⣾⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠁⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⡇⠀⠈⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣇⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠙⠓⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⠿⠿⠿⠋⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠊⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣆⠀⠈⠙⠛⠛⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠔⠁⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⡋⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠓⠲⠤⢤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣶⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠾⠟⠻⠿⣿⠿⡿⢿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢸⣷⡸⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣶⠀⠋⣠⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⢀⣾⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠙⠁⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
January 2021

League of Legends

Rob from the Romanian sausage truck

twitchquotes: Hey "Kripp!" It's me -- Rob from the Romanian sausage truck. I haven't seen you come by in a while! My friend told me you were a famous gamer, so I searched for you online. I honestly had no idea! Thanks for the shout-out. Keep rocking, and come by for a sausage if you have the chance. I'd love to see you again.
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp

Anime girl surprised

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⢻⣿⣟⣛⣉⣉⣉⣉⠉⠉⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠟⠋⠀⠁⠐⠂⢀⠖⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠲⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣤⣤⣄⣀⣠⠾⢯⣤⣦⣤⣤⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⡟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⢾⣿⠟⢉⡉⠉⢹⣟⢿⣷⣦⢢⠘⣿⠃⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠸⠁⢰⣿⣷⣶⣤⣿⣷⠙⢿⡃⠀⠛⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠚⠻⠿⣿⣟⣻⡿⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠟⣿⠇⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣭⣕⡀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠉⠻⢿⣦⡀⠹⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣷⣄⠀⣦⡻⣷⡀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣶⣦⡀⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢿⣧⠄⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣏⡿⠃⣼⡿⠤⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠀⠀⠛⠃⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
May 2021

Weebs

How will this affect Rick James?

twitchquotes: Yesterday I walked into the bathroom and my brother was taking a shit. I don't know why he didn't lock the door, but before I could leave he asked me to grab him a roll of toilet paper. As I was handing it to him he jumped up and smacked a hand full of shit across my face...How will this affect Rick James?
twitch chat
July 2014
Reynad

mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing