[Copypasta] 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks

twitchquotes: 4 people broke into my house and held me hostage last night. Somehow they've heard I hold 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks and wanted me to withdraw it to a specific bank account. I had to explain for 2 hours how it's all fake money and that I've spent almost a week trading fake stocks just to gain nothing. They ended up calling me a fucking loser and left..
twitch chat
March 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Feed in every game

twitchquotes: As Michael "imaqtpie" Santana sat shivering on the cold pavement, Lisha, who happened to be passing by, decided to share a loaf of bread with him. He wanted to share her kindness, and so he decided to feed in every game henceforth.
twitch chat
April 2015
imaqtpie

I am contacting you as a representative of the NSA

twitchquotes: Hello Mr. Octavian Morosan. I am contacting you as a representative of the NSA. Recent reports say that you are playing a children's card game and spilling PJSalt everywhere. The PJSalt is clogging our network and blocking our abilities to spy on you and the rest of Canadaland. I am going to have to ask you to stop the salt as it is a threat to national security. Please don't copy paste this official document. This is serious.
twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp

salty

Pornhub

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣤⠀⢠⣤⡄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠸⠿⠇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠷⣤⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⣤⣤⡀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠘⠿⠿⠃⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠦⠤⠤⠴⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣤⣄⡀⠠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣀⣀⣀⡀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠉⢉⣉⣉⣉⣉⣉⣉⡉⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠻⠿⠿⠿⣿⡿⠿⠇⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣾⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⢉⣩⣭⣭⣭⡄⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣿⡟⠋⠉⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣾⣿⣶⣶⣶⡆⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⡆⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣾⣏⠀⠀⣹⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠘⠿⠿⠿⠟⠃⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
July 2020

Its the final hand of the Mortdog High Stakes Poker Tourney

Its the final hand of the Mortdog High Stakes Poker Tourney. Kiyoon can be heard screaming "its a third??” after losing the last hand. Only Raydiz and K3soju are left. Mort deals their cards. Soju smirks and says “alright, bet”. Ray, feeling confident, slides all his chips into the middle of the table “fuck it, we’re all in this round”. Soju confidently throws down his cards “3 aces, KEWK”. Ray laughs and reveals his winning hand “I have a straight flush, diamond 1 to diamond 5”
July 2022

Teamfight Tactics

Text-to-Speech Playing