[Copypasta] 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks

twitchquotes: 4 people broke into my house and held me hostage last night. Somehow they've heard I hold 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks and wanted me to withdraw it to a specific bank account. I had to explain for 2 hours how it's all fake money and that I've spent almost a week trading fake stocks just to gain nothing. They ended up calling me a fucking loser and left..
twitch chat
March 2019
TwitchStocks.com is a new website where users can buy and sell streamer stocks using fake money
I used to be a real ad
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Same

twitchquotes: The time was 1:53 AM. This is the last game of my plat promos. The season will end in 7 minutes. We're down by bot turret with our team as we push our lead. I see Scott rolling in as Rammus, traveling at a speed that would put Sonic himself to shame. His words echo through my $5 earbuds. "I'M GOING IN!" I pause to take in the world around me. I can do anything right now. Physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual limits no longer apply to me. I gather the strength in my forefinger as I slowly lift it over my R key. I say...no, I yell, with the ferocity of a million suns, the single word that could be heard around the world. "Same!" Galio prepares himself before leaping into the air, and delivering a devastating blow to the enemies' backline. We did it. The enemy team retreats back into their low elo. I was platinum. With a farewell to Scott for his outstanding work, I drag myself to my bed, ready to fall asleep. My phone chimes. Checking the notifications, I saw only one. A text from Clown9 Sneaky. The message brought a tear to my eye. The message simply read: โ€œIโ€™m proud of you.โ€ Now very emotional, I typed a reply. "Same."
twitch chat
July 2020
Sneaky

League of Legends

Profesionali playertti of Defenders of the Agnolotti

twitchquotes: hello, il mio nome is GIROLAMO SAVORANOLA I my italiano. I want be profesionali playeretti of Defenders of the Agnolotti. the I sold all my spaghetti so i can bought a branderini new coputterini and farma all gaems. Per favore no coperinato pasterinato caramel macchiato
twitch chat
March 2014
Riot Games

monkaS BUTTON

twitchquotes: monkaS ๐Ÿ‘‰ ๐Ÿ”ด BUTTON monkaS ๐Ÿ‘‰ ๐Ÿ”ด monkaS ๐Ÿ‘‰ ๐Ÿ”ด BUTTON monkaS ๐Ÿ‘‰ ๐Ÿ”ด
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

I once had sleep paralysis

twitchquotes: i once had sleep paralysis and i imagined Kripparian slowly slithering up to me and i felt the brush of his wirey beard press against my chest and his boulder-like face was a miillimeter away from mine and he whispered "..He had the perfect cerds" then drained all my RNG power right out of my chest. I cried for days.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

For a little donger, I pack a big punch!

twitchquotes: เผผ แ•ค๏ปฟโ—•โ—กโ—• เผฝแ•ค For a little donger, I pack a big punch! เผผ แ•ค๏ปฟโ—•โ—กโ—• เผฝแ•ค!!!
twitch chat
March 2015
Trump
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