[Copypasta] It starts with a surge of adrenaline

twitchquotes: It starts with a surge of adrenaline. Signals flood the nervous system. Pupils race back and forth behind closed eyelids. Then open. Now it’s up to you to decide what to do with it.
twitch chat
March 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kripp has contracted Casualitis

twitchquotes: The average length of Kripp's stream has decreased over the past 3 years from an average length of 11 hours to the current average of 5 hours. In 2 more years, Kripp will stream for 0 hours. What's the cause? Sources say Kripp has contracted a terminal illness - Casualitis. Soon he will join Katarrian in Heaven. BibleThump
twitch chat
November 2015
Kripp

nl_kripp this is le reddit army!

twitchquotes: @nl_kripp this is le reddit army! Please cease streaming or be prepared to get downvoted!! If you do not IMMEDIATELY stop streaming I'm going to meme you so hard that you're fedora falls off. I bet you did nazi see that coming. Nailed it, you see what I did there? DO NOT COPY PASTE THIS! Good day sir!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

AYAYA 2

⡿⠋⠄⣀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣌⠻⣿⣿ ⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠹⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠹ ⣿⣿⡟⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣮⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆ ⡟⢻⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣣⠄⡀⢬⣭⣻⣷⡌⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠃⣸⡀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠈⣆⢹⣿⣿⣿⡈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⢻⡇⠄⢛⣛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠹⣿⣆⠸⣆⠙⠛⠛⠃⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠸⣡⠄⡈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠁⣠⣉⣤⣴⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⡄⢿⣆⠰⡘⢿⣿⠿⢛⣉⣥⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⠟⣉⣤⣶⣶⣾⣿⡄⣿⡿⢸ ⠄⢰⠸⣿⠄⢳⣠⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢻⡇⢸ ⢷⡈⢣⣡⣶⠿⠟⠛⠓⣚⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⢸⠇⠘ ⡀⣌⠄⠻⣧⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠘⠄⠄ ⣷⡘⣷⡀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡋⢀⣠⣤⣶⣶⣾⡆⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣷⡘⣿⡀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⡄⢀ ⣿⣿⣷⡈⢷⡀⠙⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠷⠾⠿⠟⣛⣋⣥⣶⣄⠄⢀⣄⠹⣦⢹⣿
July 2019

Weebs

Disappointed that Reynad doesn't live in the Dead Sea

twitchquotes: I was disappointed to find that when i flew to the Dead Sea to realize that Reynad doesn't live there, considering it's the saltiest sea in the world.
twitch chat
October 2014
Reynad

Infinite poop

twitchquotes: Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can't free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you've broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.
twitch chat
June 2019

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing