[Copypasta] Copypasta being funny is just incomprehensible

twitchquotes: I always thought comedy was something I could never lose my grasp on, but "Copypasta" being funny to anybody is just incomprehensible.
twitch chat
April 2019
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Let's get one thing about me "straight" up-front

twitchquotes: Let's get one thing about me "straight" up-front. When it comes to sexuality, I'm about as hetero as they come. If a gay guy came on to me, I'd be like, "No way, bro. I'm a straight-up party boy who's into chicks." Yup, one gay dude wouldn't stand a chance. It would take at least four or five gay guys strapping me down to make it inside me. Sorry, fellas, that's just how straight I am. And even then I wouldn't make it easy. I'd be like, "Hey look! There goes George Michael!" And they'd all shriek "Where?!" at once, and I'd make a break for it, and they'd be like, "He's getting away! Chase him! I want his butt!" But I wouldn't just give them my butt. They'd have to take it. And once they got me strapped down, I'd stop fighting it because that would be giving them what they want. And I don't want them to enjoy it. If anyone's going to enjoy it, it's going to be me. So, I'd just relax into it and taunt them by telling them how ripped and sexy I find them and letting them know how much I'm enjoying myself. So, even though I'd have a bunch of ripped guys all taking turns on my butt, I'd still be enjoying it. But only because I forced myself to. It's not like I could fight these guys off. There are too many of them and they want me too much. What am I, Chuck Norris?" I'm not against homosexuality, though. I say to each his own. You're free to do whatever you want.
twitch chat
February 2020

KappaPride

When will C9 play at Worlds?

twitchquotes: Hi guys, I'm a 12 year old from Uganda. I sold my 6 kids just to be able to afford internet to watch C9 play at worlds. When will they play?
twitch chat
October 2020
Riot Games

League of Legends

AngelThump v2

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⠿⠋⢀⣠⣤⣄⡀⠙⢿⡿⠛⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢠⣶⣦⡈⠃⡠⡺⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠦⠀⢠⣾⣿⣆⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣰⣿⣿⣿⡟⢠⠸⠟⠈⠛⠛⠛⠸⠿⡀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣧⣈⠛⢿⣿⣿ ⠿⠟⢋⣠⣾⣿⣿⢿⣻⣇⢸⡀⠀⢸⣦⣤⣾⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣄⠙ ⣀⠚⠛⠛⣽⡿⠃⠛⣠⣤⡀⠃⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⢀⣴⣦⣙⣘⠛⠗⢉⣁⣴ ⣿⣿⣿⣤⣁⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠙⠛⠛⠛⠉⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿
November 2020

The simple equation to such a peasant game, 5Head 🍷

twitchquotes: 5Head Aha, I see, i have calculated this equation of where my enemy can and will go. The numbers are almost 85.1829% chance that they will go right over my crosshair, thus leading my equation into the correct mathematical path into my favor with the proceeding 1 kill or so. The simple equation to such a peasant game, 5Head 🍷
twitch chat
July 2019

Lmao you call yourself a XQC fan? I’m fucking loaded on reddit accounts bro

Lmao you call yourself a XQC fan? I’m fucking loaded on reddit accounts bro. I practically control r/place, I’m that fucking powerful. Try talking in chat again when you’re a true fan...
April 2022
xQcOW
Text-to-Speech Playing