[Copypasta] What's that?

twitchquotes: "Octavian," weeps a heartbroken Rania, "we need to talk. I'm not happy anymore. Your frail, vegan body no longer satisfies me. I asked you for a child, and all you gave me was this mangy mutt. Well, I've got news for you. I'm pregnant, and I bet you know who the father is. That's right, it's Tanner from Foot Locker. I'm leaving you, Octavian, you've ruined everything. Do you have anything to say for yourself?" Kripp lifts the headphone off his ear and glances in Rania's direction. "What's that?"
twitch chat
May 2019
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Levitating a hockey stick

twitchquotes: ( 汀掳 蜏蕱 汀掳)鈺暡_____ don't mind me, just levitating a hockey stick
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

My daughter was born with a hearing impairment

twitchquotes: My daughter was born with a hearing impairment than ultimately left her deaf shortly after birth. I have been working for years to pay for a new surgery that would allow her to hear again. Today was her 8th birthday and I managed to get her what she's always wanted for her birthday, the sense of hearing. I decided to let her listen in on what Daddy has been watching late at night and I turn on your stream and what do I hear? Silence. Now she's crying thinking she's deaf again, Nice job Kripp.
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Classic

Stuck in Kripp's basement

twitchquotes: |虆|(虆|虆鈼壧厊虆鈼√厊虆鈼斕厊虆)虆| HELP I'M STUCK IN KRIPP'S BASEMENT |虆|(虆|虆鈼壧厊虆鈼√厊虆鈼斕厊虆)虆|
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

When drums play, my hands automatically type Kreygasm

twitchquotes: 銉洁技嗪堎勍溹簣嗉斤緣 when drums play, my hands automatically type Kreygasm , i live for the moment and when Kripp comes i feel i have sex with the stream, all becoming well met. 銉洁技嗪堎勍溹簣嗉斤緣
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp

Watch a middle aged man play a children's card game

twitchquotes: EleGiggle THAT MOMENT EleGiggle WHEN YOU EleGiggle REALIZE EleGiggle EleGiggle THAT YOU PAY $5 A MONTH EleGiggle TO WATCH A MIDDLE AGED MAN EleGiggle PLAY A CHILDRENS CARTOON GAME EleGiggle
twitch chat
May 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing