[Copypasta] What's that?

twitchquotes: "Octavian," weeps a heartbroken Rania, "we need to talk. I'm not happy anymore. Your frail, vegan body no longer satisfies me. I asked you for a child, and all you gave me was this mangy mutt. Well, I've got news for you. I'm pregnant, and I bet you know who the father is. That's right, it's Tanner from Foot Locker. I'm leaving you, Octavian, you've ruined everything. Do you have anything to say for yourself?" Kripp lifts the headphone off his ear and glances in Rania's direction. "What's that?"
twitch chat
May 2019
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Kripp throws his paintbrush across the room

twitchquotes: Kripp throws his paintbrush across the room. "The canvas needed to topdeck exactly that color to win!" he yells. Dex brings Kripp his paintbrush and Kripp tries again. He tries to paint a happy tree but paints a sad cactus. "The canvas is obviously sniping. How else could it know I was painting a happy tree?" Dex barks. "Quiet, Dex!" screams Kripp as he paints the bottom right of the canvas and concedes.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

Octavian, this is Brian Weiss with Grinding Gear Games

twitchquotes: Octavian, this is Brian Weiss with Grinding Gear Games. We understand there was an issue with our last financial restructuring that inadvertently canceled the auto-pay into your account. We've gone ahead and rectified the issue, as well as forwarding an additional 10% as an apology. We look forward to your updated commentary regarding our latest content expansion for Path of Exile.
twitch chat
August 2017
Kripp

sellout

Kripp starts a salt mine

twitchquotes: As Kripp frantically tries to fix his router and internet issues. The stays dedicated and vigilante. After trying to fix these issues that arose at hand he finally came to realize that this was all worth nothing. He stopped fixing the issues and threw his computer out the window. He started up a Salt Mining company in the Himalayan mountains called Kripp Salt. He is starting a family and all is well. Thanks Kripp. BibleThump
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Interactive Game

twitchquotes: ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮ Hey Kripp, here's an "interactive game" for you. ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp is a god at these types of games

twitchquotes: All you people saying this game is easy, I guarantee if you played this or watched any other streamer play this, you would still be bronze and struggling. Kripp is a god at these types of games, he could reach diamond his first day if he wanted to. Kripp understands games on a level we can't even imagine to be possible. His mechanics are impeccable. With his theory crafting, his builds today will be the future meta. It is amazing we get to live in a time with the king of games.
twitch chat
November 2017
Kripp
More Kripp Copypastas
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