[Copypasta] Endgame spoilers

twitchquotes: I just saw endgame, and it was pretty good, but there were a few weird things. I thought it was strange how the Russo Brothers decided to render Thanos’ erect penis in such vivid detail. The veins were so perfectly done I couldn’t even tell his cock wasn’t real. Another thing I found weird was when Black Panther broke the fourth wall and gave the audience the n-word pass. I did appreciate it, but it would feel more in place in a Deadpool movie. Overall, it was still excellent, but I think that they definitely need to reconsider some things.
twitch chat
May 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Please try and make some new fresh pasta

twitchquotes: Guys, seriously? The somalian guy pasta? You disapoint me. I thought twitch had the dankest memes but i guess originality runs out fast. Pls try and make some new fresh pasta instead of insisting on a one year old meme. Thank you
twitch chat
April 2015
imaqtpie

You have been gifted free happiness

twitchquotes: ———————————————————————— TwitchVotes You have been gifted free happiness. Type widepeepoHappy to activate————————————————————————
twitch chat
September 2020

Masturbation Notice from school

MASTURBATION NOTICE It has come to our attention that students have been masturbating in the school bathrooms. Masturbating on school property is ILLEGAL and against school district policy The bathroom pipes are NOT designed to handle human discharge or anything other than your regular bathroom duties The excessive amounts of discharge build-up has caused a blockage in the pipes. Multiple pipes have become close to bursting due to the amount of excessive semen build-up. This will cost THOUSANDS of dollars coming from our funds to repair the damage caused by this Please masturbate in your own homes and at your own disposal If any discharge is discovered in the bathroom, it will be collected and analyzed to determine who it belongs to. If it is discovered that the discharge is yours, YOU will be fine $ 1,000 and be reported to proper authorities Thank you for your cooperation
March 2022

Rick

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣷⡄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣀⣠⣤⣤⡤⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣋⣅⣀⣀⣌⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⡟⠋⠉⠀⠀⠉⠙⠻⢶⡌⢻⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣾⣿⣧⣶⣦⣄⢀⣤⣶⣦⣄⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣀ ⠀⣰⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠆⠀⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠁ ⠀⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⠻⠿⠟⡃⠀⠻⠿⠿⠟⠀⠀⣿⣿⣶⣄⠀⠀ ⠀⢹⣿⣤⣤⣄⣀⠀⠾⠿⣿⡀⠀⠀⣇⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠙⣿⣿⡿⠿⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⢀⣼⡧⢀⣠⣤⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣶⣿⣍⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠈⠽⢷⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⠂⠀⢠⣿⡍⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣼⠉⢧⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣡⢽⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠞⠃⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⡇⠀⠘⡆⠀⠀⠀⢸⣸⢼⡽⣿⣷⣄⢰⣿⣦⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⣷⣶⡄⢠⠎⠀⠀⣰⢟⣿⣿⣿⣿⢻⡄⠈⢳⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⢀⡇⠀⣰⠋⠀⣤⣼⠏⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠘⣷⠀⠀⢳⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠈⣇⣵⠃⠀⢠⣿⡏⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⢹⡆⠀⠈⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠉⠉⠀⣠⣾⣿⠻⣄⣻⣿⣿⣿⡇⣤⡾⠃⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
April 2020

Am I the asshole for dropping my 6 year old son at an orphanage for his inability to trade options?

This started about 4 years ago when my son was 2 years old. I started to supplement his picture books and cartoons with beginner options books and Martin Shkerli's live videos on how to pick pharmaceutical stocks. Over the course of these years I feel like he has retained absolutely nothing even though I have spent every waking minute trying to make him understand. I have done almost everything that I have thought of including having Jerome Powell's speeches play while he is sleeping and only having Warren Buffet on the TV to try and make him understand the market. I felt as though I got to a breaking point when he couldn't differentiate between a straddle and a strangle even though we we went through different strategies for almost a month straight. I finally convinced my wife that we were doing the right thing when I said that he will soon be a Wendy's worker begging his wife's husband for a weekly allowance because he will never amount to be anything. I couldn't fathom raising a kid who was not able to able to make a profit from trading options by the time he was 10. With all that said if anyone wants a 6 year old child who is shitty at market strategy check out Eternal Sunny Orphanage in Omaha, Nebraska and maybe your luck will be better than mine with him.
September 2021

Am I The Asshole?

WallStreetBets

More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing