[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Inappropriate humor

twitchquotes: All of this “dick humor” is highly Inappropriate, my dick is 2.462 feet long and still growing, all of you twitch “charters” can’t even compensate the size
twitch chat
April 2019

Ok, so I main Mercy

twitchquotes: Ok, so I main Mercy all I see is a bunch of posts and comments basically talking shit about Mercy mains. But let me tell you something, you need us. Honestly, do you think it's easy playing Mercy or something? Every time I hear "I need healing" it feels like a synapse in my brain just snapped. Like do you think I'm fucking blind or something? Do you not think I can see the big red target saying "CRITICAL"?? and you guys have the audacity to talk down on us Mercy mains.
twitch chat
June 2017

Overwatch

Art of Conquest is the best!

twitchquotes: (sponsored viewer): Hey Kripp! I just saw your Youtube video about Art of Conquest! It looks like such an amazing free game with a lot of wonderful content and replayablility. I was wondering you were going to play Art of Conquest on stream for us tonight? It would be a privilege to watch such a skilled gamer with a positive attitude such as yourself play this mind-bogglingly complex game. Thanks Kripp, you're the best - just like Art of Conquest!
twitch chat
September 2017
Kripp

sellout

4Head balance cans

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ  DrinkPurple ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ  DrinkPurple ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ  DrinkPurple ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ  DrinkPurple ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ  DrinkPurple ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ  4Head
twitch chat
September 2016

VAPE ME UP, VAPE ME UP INSIDE

twitchquotes: VapeNation VAPE ME UP VapeNation VAPE ME UP INSIDE VapeNation CAN'T VAPE UP VapeNation VAPE ME UP INSIDE VapeNation VAPE MEEEEE VapeNation CALL MY NAME AND VAPE ME VapeNation
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp

VapeNation

Text-to-Speech Playing