[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
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More Copypastas

Complexities behind classical music

twitchquotes: Chat doesnt understand the complexities behind classical music. While most of chat spends their days spamming "Kappas" and such, I study music theory and the works of Bach and Mozart. Musical masterpieces such as these are not easy for the average person to comprehend, and certainly above those that chat.
twitch chat
July 2018

I hate Twitch Chat

Undertale Sans

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March 2016

Confused DrDisrespect

⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠉⣉⣀⣀⣈⠉⠻⠿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠛⠁⣠⣤⣤⣤⣄⠈⠋⠁⠠⣾⡿⠛⠛⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠠⣴⣶⣦⣤⡀⠙⢿ ⠃⢰⣿⠿⠛⠛⢿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⡿⠁⠄⠂⠂⠄⠘⠉⠙⠻⣿⣦⠈ ⣦⣤⣀⣀⠈⢠⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⣠⣴⣾⣿⠏⢠ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣤⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣈⠛⠋⠉⠄⢠⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⢰⣿⣶⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⡈⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⢉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠦⡘⠿⠿⣿⡿⣧⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣄⠄⠠⠄⠄⠄⢀⡌⠁⠄⠄⠄⣹⠟⡁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿ ⣿⣿⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣷⣦⡤⣾⣿⣷⢄⣀⣀⣠⣶⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣤⣶⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⢿⠿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡍⠄⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿⠁⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣯⣉⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣆⣼⣿⠲⠲⠶⢦⣄⡀⠻⡏⠄⠄⠰⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠠⠄⠄⠄⠻⢝⠿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⠟⢃⡄⠁⠄⠄⠸⣾⡿⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⠟⠛⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠁⠚⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠒⠿⣿⣿⣿
May 2020
DrDisRespectLIVE

Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

March 2021

ESAM's tag actually has a secret meaning

twitchquotes: fun fact: ESAM's tag actually has a secret meaning. the SAM is for his name, Samuel. the E stands for "electronic" since he plays electronic games
twitch chat
April 2019
pgESAM

Super Smash Bros

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