[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Alvin from "Alvin and the Chipmunks" is not a chipmunk

Alvin from "Alvin and the Chipmunks" is not a chipmunk. This is proven by the name "Alvin and the Chipmunks", as you can see, Alvin is separated from the chipmunks, suggesting that Alvin is an entirely different species, making him an "imposter" amongst the others. Also, in "The Chipettes", Brittney has the strongest resemblance to Alvin, so why is it not called "Brittney and the Chipettes". So all that proves that Alvin is not a chipmunk. Not to mention that Alvin wears red, and I'm not sure about you, but that seems awfully sus to me. In the video game "Among us", the color red is was the birth of the obnoxious catchphrase, "red sus", being that the color red in the game is a stereotype that they are the imposter. While that might be unrelated, keep in mind that Alvin wears red too, and he is also the imposter amongst the other chipmunks. So this proves that Alvin is not a chipmunk, or anything like that. Alvin is just a sussy amogus imposter.
October 2021

Amogus Army

𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ𓊹Ꭿ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ𓊹Ꭿ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ𓊹Ꭿ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ𓊹Ꭿ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ𓊹Ꭿ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ𓊹Ꭿ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ𓊹Ꭿ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ𓊹Ꭿ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ 𓌜ඞ 𓌱ඞ 𓌏ඞ
April 2022

Among Us / Amogus

Kappa is no longer working

twitchquotes: ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime ATTENTION ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime Someone has reported that the kappa emote is no longer working. Please type "Ka ppa" (no spaces) to confirm that it is indeed still working. Kappa
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

This guy's pasta is CRAZY!

twitchquotes: ☑ This guy's pasta is CRAZY!” ☑ “My rigatoni can't win against a linguini like that” ☑ "He NEEDED that alfredo to win" ☑ “He meatballed the only marinara that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect fettucini ☑ “There was nothing I could cook” ☑ “I cooked that al dente”
twitch chat
August 2014

Who let the dongs out?!

twitchquotes: ヽ༼◕ل͜◕༽ノ Who let the dongs out?! Woof ╰( ͡°ᴥ ͡° ʋ)╯ Woof woof woof woof ╰( ͡°ᴥ ͡° ʋ)╯
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing