[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Kripp and his tiny peckerwood

twitchquotes: Omg Kripp... I remember seeing you in the hallways during school. I remember seeing your zipper down and I kept eyeing you tiny peckerwood. You always had the cutest grin. Please call me (205-069-1337) and find me. I will always love you. ~Eddy Pepperino (not wearing any panties atm).
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

So you're going by "c9Sneaky" now nerd?

twitchquotes: So you're going by "c9Sneaky" now nerd? Haha whats up douche bag, it's Tanner from Highschool. Remember me? Me and the guys used to give you a hard time in school. Sorry you were just an easy target lol. I can see not much has changed. Remember Antwan250 the boy you had a crush on? Yeah we're married now. I make over 200k a year and drive a mustang GT. I guess some things never change huh loser? Nice catching up lol. Pathetic
twitch chat
April 2018
Sneaky

Tanner from High School

Find out how old is your waifu

twitchquotes: 10 12 14 16 18 20 22 24 26 28 30 find out how old is your waifu ⎝ PedoBear
twitch chat
June 2016

Greekeroni Philosopheroni

twitchquotes: hey qtpie i'm a greekeroni philosopheroni and i want to share my toughts. so far for me KAPPA is god KAPPA is in everything so we are KAPPA we are god this is my philosopheroni pls no kapparoni papajohnny
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie

You've been gnomed 2

⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣤⣀⢠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠉⠙⢹⣿⣏⠉⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⡛⠛⢛⣛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠛⠿⠛⠻⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣽ ⣇⣀⠄⣀⡀⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠛⠛⠿⣿⢿⠿⠟⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿
November 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing