[Copypasta] That's the power of cargo pants

twitchquotes: Excuse me? Cargo pants, motherfucker. My pockets have pockets. You can't stop the storage. And when it gets too hot, just unzip and remove the lower half of the legs. Utility, motherfuckers. Want me to hold your phone for a second? how about I hold one of every phone on the market, each with their own individual pocket. Want me to hold your souvenir from your vacation to Europe? How about I put Europe in my pocket. That's the power of cargo pants, motherfuckers
twitch chat
August 2019
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More Copypastas

I've never even watched The Simpsons

I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
December 2020

Reynad and Kripp lay sprawled across the bed

twitchquotes: Reynad and Kripp lay sprawled across the bed, every inch of them exhausted from the rigorous topdecking that had just occurred. "Your deck was crazy" Kripp whimpered before remebering that he'd forgotten to pay. He grabbed a few coins from his emergency OJ stash. "Welcome to the five dollar club" he said as Reynad oiled up for the brofist.
twitch chat
April 2015
Reynad

KappaPride

Tanner's life continues its downward spiral

twitchquotes: After his shift at McDonald's, Tanner sits alone in his dark, dingy apartment, waiting for Kripp's stream to begin. As soon as Kripp's face appears, he begins one of his tirades, insulting and mocking Kripp, the happily-married, multi-millionaire video game streaming sensation. "That'll show him", Tanner mutters to himself, as his life continues its downward spiral.
twitch chat
December 2018
Kripp

Tanner from High School

Hi Kripp, it's Jarl Balgruuf the Greater

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp it's Jarl Balgruuf the Greater. I heard you are trying to play other games when we need you here at Skyrim to clean up the dragons. Quit what you are doing right now and come join me as the new Whiterun Thane. My axe is ready as your reward.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Super Meat Boy v2

⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣦⣶⢶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠛⢿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡟⠡⠂⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠘⠁⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⢠⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣗⢴⣶⣷⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣗⣄⣼⣷⣶⡄⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⡅⠐⣶⣦⣶⠀⢰⣶⣴⣦⣦⣶⠴⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣷⣬⡛⠷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣭⣭⣥⣭⣵⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠙⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⢛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
October 2020
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