[Copypasta] Destroy and obliterate the Economy of Turkey

twitchquotes: As I have stated strongly before, and just to reiterate, if Turkey does anything that I, in my great and unmatched wisdom, consider to be off limits, I will totally destroy and obliterate the Economy of Turkey (I’ve done before!). They must, with Europe and others, watch over the captured ISIS fighters and families. The U.S. has done far more than anyone could have ever expected, including the capture of 100% of the ISIS Caliphate. It is time now for others in the region, some of great wealth, to protect their own territory. THE USA IS GREAT!
twitch chat
October 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, this is Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur from 194 B.C .... I came to warn you about the extinction of Herbivores and the 'never lucky' curse it bestows on us. Kripp, you must eat meat immediately! If you don't, a giant "MEAT-EOR" will crash into earth and extinct us all... again... Us Herbivores were wrong. WE WERE WRONG! WutFace
twitch chat
April 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Trolling My Dad's Office with Among Us (Office Series Part 6, Finale Part 3)

The other day, it was “take your kid to work day” at my dad’s job. It was really epic and poggers because I got to skip school for it. As we were walking in, I couldn’t help but notice that the company logo roughly resembled a crewmate from the popular game, Among Us. I asked my father, “Is this the Among Us but real??” My dad replied “No, son, this is the Pepsico corporate office.” As we entered the building, my dad said “Son, I have a lot of work to do today. You can hang out with the other kids or play on your phone, just please stay on this floor.” He then entered the elevator and left. I turned to the other kids (who were all playing on their phones) and said “Does anyone wanna play some Among Us?” However, no one else wanted to play. I was getting bored, so I decided to explore around a little bit. I walked into the elevator and pressed the button for the top floor.As the elevator door opened, I saw what appeared to be a long hallway. As I was walking down it, I found a door that was labeled “Executive Meeting Room”. The door was unlocked, so I walked in and there were about 15 people in suits and ties around a table. They all looked up at me in confusion. One of them asked me “Hey buddy, are you lost?” I noticed that his nametag read “Hugh Johnson, CFO”. “Does CFO stand for Chungus Fortnite Officer?”, I asked. “No, it does not. And where is your parent? Go back to the bottom floor young man!” He was yelling at me. So I said “You’re sus. I should eject you, Hugh Johnson. Do you have a… HUGE JOHNSON?! That’s funny like Big Chungus, which is the Bugs Bunny from Looney Tunes but a big rabbit!” I laughed. Everyone was looking up at me in shock when I said “Wanna play some Among Us guys?” The CEO, a very sexy woman, ooga booga awooga, said “Young man, go back to the first floor now!” But the sexy woman I just couldn’t listen to as I admired her. “No, because you have big tits.” Her jaw dropped, and she said, “Young man, this is an important meeting. Get the fuck out!” She then used the intercom to call security. Coming to the realization that I was running out of time, I pulled down my pants to show everyone my Among Us underwear. I jumped up onto the meeting table and started twerking (to make sure everyone saw my among us underwear I got for Christmas) and said “Do you like what you see?” Everyone was yelling at me to get out as I was twerking. “I’m so hot~~~~” I said. The yelling got louder. I ran out of the door and closed it, hoping that security wouldn’t find me. I quickly ran into the elevator and went down.
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

Hello. My name is Inigo Dongtoya

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ ͠ ͠°〜 ͜ʖ〜 ͠ ͠° ༽ノ¤=[———— Hello. My name is Inigo Dongtoya. You killed my Kappa. Prepare to die.
twitch chat
March 2015

Classic

The sweat begins to form at qts brow

twitchquotes: The sweat begins to form at qts brow. His fingers are clammy, his neckbeard ruffled. After dying yet again he sees the hope of getting challenger fade away. "oh my god i cant believe we didn't get that guy," he proclaims. This is the beginning of the end for imaqtpie.
twitch chat
May 2019
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Big eyes NaM

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣟⣻⡍⠉⠉⠉⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢏⣴⣾⡿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⣱⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣦⣤⣀⠈⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⣼⣿⡟⠁⠄⢀⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠈⢻⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣧⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠾⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣷⠄⠚⢧⠸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⢀⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣠⡀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⢸⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⠿⠿⣿⡆⠈⣿⣿⣿⠄⣾⡟⠁⠄⢳⠄⠄⣤⠠⠄⣿⣿ ⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⡄⠄⠸⣿⡀⢀⠽⠁⢀⡿⣿⣿⡄⠹⢿⣦⣤⡾⠄⠄⠉⠄⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣄⠄⠄⠈⠃⢀⣦⣬⣁⣤⣤⣴⣿⠇⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣴⣾⠄⠄⢠⢻⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⢀⣿⣿⣭⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢀⣤⡲⣸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣆⣀⣀⡈⡟⠛⢛⡛⡛⠻⠦⠅⠪⠽⠬⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⣿⣼⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠙⢙⠿⠿⣿⣿⣷⡮⢿⡿⢿⣹⢿⡳⣱⣿⣿⣿⣳⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣜⠦⣬⣛⠶⠶⣶⣷⣶⡶⠠⠘⣣⢉⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣮⣝⢿⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⣴⢞⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣝⣻⠿⠿⣋⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
June 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing