[Copypasta] When batman beats mentally ill clowns

twitchquotes: How come when batman dons a suit of armor and beats up mentally ill clowns its "Heroic" but when I do it I'm "Committing manslaughter" and I'm "Not allowed in McDonalds again"
twitch chat
November 2019
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Casual Kripp has finally reached the bottom

twitchquotes: Casual Kripp has finally reached the bottom. He has descended to casualness not often witnessed. He watches other people play and imagines their wins as his. His ego is inflated to enormous levels, and he cannot help but pat himself on the back and take credit for a game he did not play. His ego is satisfied for now, but what comes next?
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Six foot antlers

twitchquotes: I bet all you beta f*gs don't wear antlers either. Science has shown that the male deers with the largest antlers attract the most females, so obviously the exact same principle works for human females. When I walk into the club reeking of sweat with six foot antlers strapped to my head, I get the attention of every female in the room. Pretty much ever man too, that's how powerful the effect is.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

Jack and Jill went up the hill

twitchquotes: Jack and Jill went up the hill๐Ÿ—ป๐Ÿž So Jack could lick her candy ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฌ ๐Ÿ…ฑ๏ธut Jack got a shock๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ’ฏ And a mouthful of cock๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ† Cause Jillโ€™s real name is R๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธndy ๐Ÿ˜ˆ
twitch chat
March 2020

Priced in

Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
December 2020

Classic

WallStreetBets

President's Day Emoji Pasta

ITS PRESIDENTS DAY SLUTS!! ๐Ÿšจ๐Ÿšจ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธtime to hop onto that founding father dick๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘ด๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘ด๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘ด๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘ด๐Ÿปor should i say founding DADDIES!!!๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ out here tryna get rammed from behind ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘harder than the rock of MOUNT RUSHMOREโ˜„๏ธโ˜„๏ธโ›ฐ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ”george washington mightve been able to survive the harsh โ„๏ธโ„๏ธ๐ŸŒฌwinters๐ŸŒฌโ„๏ธโ„๏ธ of valley forge, but can he handle the conditions between the sheets๐ŸŒช๐Ÿ’‘โ“โ“โ“be the monica Lewinsky ๐Ÿ™‹๐Ÿปto my bill clinton๐Ÿ™‹โ€โ™‚๏ธ baby and i wont deny i had ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†โ™‹๏ธsexual relationsโ™‹๏ธ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ† with you!!! crack the whip down harder on your bae than ronald Reagan did on welfare programs๐Ÿ’ธ๐Ÿ’ธ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿผโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿผโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿผโ€โ™‚๏ธโœ๐Ÿปsend this to FIVE of your baddest presidential PRINCESSES๐Ÿ‘ธ๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‘ธ๐Ÿผwho will throw the nastiest neck๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ™Œ๐ŸŒฌ๐Ÿ’ฆ on this AMERICAN BEAUT OF A DAY๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿšจโค๏ธ if you get 10 back, be prepared for the president to enter the oval office of you PUSSY tonight๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ
February 2024

Emoji Pasta

Holiday Emoji

President's Day

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