[Copypasta] When batman beats mentally ill clowns

twitchquotes: How come when batman dons a suit of armor and beats up mentally ill clowns its "Heroic" but when I do it I'm "Committing manslaughter" and I'm "Not allowed in McDonalds again"
twitch chat
November 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
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MAURICIO HONORATO

twitchquotes: I have never seen a team with MAURICIO HONORATO lose a game.... I mean, he's perfect, incredible, good aim, intelligent, handsome... I honestly don't see MAURICIO HONORATO losing this game.
twitch chat
September 2018

Overwatch

I love Carl from Brawl Stars

Guys, I’m literally detecting seismic activity. I never wanted to rock with anyone more than I want to with Carl. That perfect, chiseled body. Those bountiful hills. The majestic mountains of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never rock with him, pass my sediment through him, and have him birth a set of perfect hot springs. I'd do fricking ANYTHING for the chance to get Carl’s rocks off. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fricking bear. Why would Supercell create something so perfect? To fricking tantalize us? Fricking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fricking can't anymore. Frick.
December 2020

A Reddit comment summarized and compressed

Anne frankly, I did nazi that coming. I literally came here to say this but boy, that escalated quickly so to the top with you! Lost it at 'This is why we can't have nice things' and then my faith in humanity was restored, my mind blown, and manly tears were shed. Well said. As a 'murican, I can confirm this gem has just won the internet and is doing it right. Just sayin', I know that feel, bro, and while that was a risky click, this post was a 9/10, 11/10 with rice, would read again. I see what you did there and it feels good man. You're doing God's work, son. I laughed way harder than I should have at your list that seems legit and totally nailed it. You - I like you. You magnificent bastard; you, sir, are so brave, a gentleman and a scholar, and seeing how you are a redditor for 4 years, this checks out, so I'll allow it. I regret that I only have one upvote to give for this cool story, bro. CTRL+F "about tree fiddy" was not disappointed. Wait, why do I have you tagged as "NOPE NOPE NOPE"? Nice try, you monster. You are now banned from /r/pyongyang What did I just read? Dafuq? I read that as "YOU HAD ONE JOB". I can't fap to this. No true scotsman could see that this relevant XKCD was bad, and you should feel bad. You must be new to reddit, so I'll see your cakeday and raise you a karma train. One does not simply rustle my jimmies, not even once. Jet fuel can't melt dank memes, that stahp gave me cancer for science, so that's enough internet for me today. OP is a fuzzy little man-peach, 2/10, would not bang. What is this I don't even know how is this wtf? Fuck Jenny. Circlejerk must be leaking. This will get buried but brace yourselves, some men want to watch the world burn right in the feels. When you see it, they'll KILL IT WITH FIRE! But this has nothing to do with atheism. Lawyer up, delete facebook, hit the gym, and SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY, said no one ever, so you wouldn't download a strawman. /r/dadjokes. Damn onions, you scary like a BOSS. whoosh. Since rule #1 is 'be attractive', I'll just leave this here: This is my [f]irst post, be gentle. Edit: This blew up. RIP my inbox. Edit: thanks for the gold kind stranger
August 2021

Pepe 200 IQ

⠄⣠⣤⣤⣄⠄⢀⣤⣤⣤⡓⠦⢤⣤⣤⣤⣔⠦⢤⣀⣀⣤⣤⢤⣀⣤⣤⣤⡀⠄ ⡿⠿⠗⣽⣿⠊⢸⣿⡇⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⠈⣾⣿⠁⣿⣿⠄ ⠄⠄⣱⣿⡟⠄⢸⣿⡇⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⠄ ⠄⣼⣿⠋⠈⠄⢸⣿⡇⣿⣿⢠⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⠄⢠⠄⠄⣿⣿⢰⢸⣿⠄⣿⣿⠄ ⠞⢿⡿⠿⠿⠄⠘⠻⠷⠿⣋⣚⣌⡻⠷⠿⢟⣘⡆⢚⡄⠿⠟⢸⣬⡛⢷⣿⣋⠄ ⠄⠄⡇⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⡋⠉⢐⣒⣒⡒⠎⠻⡿⣛⣩⠭⠭⢤⣀⣀⠄ ⢸⡍⠄⠄⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡓⠕⣊⣭⠥⠄⠄⢩⣍⢿⡏⣴⣶⠡⠄⠐⣮⣝⠳ ⠸⢲⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣉⡻⠿⠆⠄⠄⠜⣋⣼⣷⣉⠿⠦⠤⣂⣡⡶⠂ ⠄⠸⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣫⣿⣿⣟⠻⠿⠿⢟⣛⠋⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄ ⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⢉⣉⠉⣠⣄⠄⣠⣤⡀⣠⣤⣀⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠘⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣀⡁⠭⣛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣀⣉⠄⠉⠙⠉⠋⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣤⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣝⣛⡒⠤⠭⠉⢩⣭⠍⣿⢛⣛⣛⡛⢛⣃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⡜⢿⠌⣵⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
November 2021

Pepe

Kamala Harris loves Fweedom

Senator Kamala Harris started her life’s work young. She laughs from her gut, the way you would with family, as she remembers being wheeled through an Oakland, California, civil rights march in a stroller with no straps with her parents and her uncle. At some point, she fell from the stroller (few safety regulations existed for children's equipment back then), and the adults, caught up in the rapture of protest, just kept on marching. By the time they noticed little Kamala was gone and doubled back, she was understandably upset. "My mother tells the story about how I’m fussing," Harris told the magazine. "And she’s like, ‘Baby, what do you want? What do you need?’ And I just looked at her and I said, ‘Fweedom.’"
January 2021

2020 US Election

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