twitchquotes:
How come when batman dons a suit of armor and beats up mentally ill clowns its "Heroic" but when I do it I'm "Committing manslaughter" and I'm "Not allowed in McDonalds again"
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What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Think of the saltwater fish
twitchquotes:
( Β° ΝΚΝ‘Β°) Hey Kripp, Marine Biologist Gilbin Pastarino here. I come to you on behald of all the salt water creatures of the world as your body seems to have absorbed 99% of the oceans salt. Please thinkerino of the poor fisheroni. Thanks
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Reynad
It's me Tanner from High School
twitchquotes:
It's me Tanner from High School. I'm sorry for bulling you in class. Now I'm trying to be a better person and make amends. Please accept my apology. I am on the 12 steps program and trying to recover from alcoholism since I was diagnosed with a rare disease called ligma Just kidding nerd!! I'm gonna keep slapping Veronica's ass and driving around in my Dodge Charger. I gotta go to the gym. Good talk!
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Tanner from High School
Got my cans of spam for quarantine
twitchquotes:
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β£Ώβ£Ώβ£β »β Ώβ β£β β β’Ώβ£Ώβ‘β’Ύβ£Ώβ‘β β »β Έβ£·β£€β‘Ώβ β Έβ£Ώβ£Ώ
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β£Ώβ£Ώβ£·β‘β β β β β β β£β£΄β ³β Ώβ β’Ήβ£Ώβ’ β‘β β’¬β β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώ
β£Ώβ£Ώβ£β »β Ώβ β£β β β’Ώβ£Ώβ‘β’Ύβ£Ώβ‘β β »β Έβ£·β£€β‘Ώβ β Έβ£Ώβ£Ώ
β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ β£β£β’Ήβ‘β β£β‘β »β‘Ώβ‘β Ήβ£Ώβ£―β β β£Ώβ‘β β’©β£Ώβ£Ώ
β£Ώβ£Ώβ£·β‘β β β β β β β£β£΄β ³β Ώβ β’Ήβ£Ώβ’ β‘β β’¬β β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώ
β£Ώβ£Ώβ£β »β Ώβ β£β β β’Ώβ£Ώβ‘β’Ύβ£Ώβ‘β β »β Έβ£·β£€β‘Ώβ β Έβ£Ώβ£Ώ Got my cans of spam for quarantine
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Coronavirus
COVID
You've been gnomed
It's not gay with socks on
When I was 13 years old a buddy of mine tried to convince me to fool around. I wasn't into it, and he told me it's not gay if you're wearing socks. I didn't believe him, went home, and asked my dad.
That's 'gentleman's gay', hardly gay at all. Don't see it much these days.
The 50s were a different time. What were we to do? We were typical boarding school boys, rich with vigor, skin slick with drying sweat and gritty earth from a game of pigskin.
At night our young, virile bodies filled the dorm with sweet-musky vapors, like game-meat stewed with apple and peppercorn. You'd awake in darkness to the hushed, melodic rhythm of two pairs of white tube socks, barely visible in moonlight, bouncing on the hardwood floor.
The deep bond of male friendship played like a thousand different human instruments. The wet claps of skin on skin, the gentle thud of heads on backboards, frenzied cries in the throes of climax. Wilbur, so fat and soft like tapioca pudding. His breasts were so like the real thing, what we fantasized of our future wives. Unwilling, defenseless Wilbur, so slow and uncoordinated in the dark. 10 of us would glaze his bare, pink flesh like a giant raspberry danish. He once had the audacity to tell Headmaster Redford. But Redford was a Deerfield boy once, he understood. So he joined us on our midnight hog hunts.
Through college and years after we'd find time here and there, away from the wives at a family lake house. But it's been decades now - the times have certainly changed. If you wanted to do something private with another man, in your socks, it wasnβt βgayβ. It was just two men, celebrating each other's strength.