twitchquotes:
One time I was asked if I was a legs man or a breasts man, I said I was into shaved pussy and anal and now Iβm "banned from KFC" and "a possible sex offender"
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I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
I sexually Identify as a Bastion
twitchquotes:
I sexually Identify as a Bastion. Ever since I was a transistor I dreamed of being nanoboosted and firing cannonballs on the disgusting enemy team. People tell me that being a Siege Automaton is impossible but I don't care, I'm overpowered. Iβm having a plastic surgeon install treads, a gattling gun and a nanoboost on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me BOOSTED and respect my right to take 35% less damage 100% of the time. If not, you're an omnic-phobe and need to check your human privileges
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Overwatch
I sexually Identify as
Dongerino goes all bongerino didgeridoo over my keyboard
Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)
I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
Classic
WallStreetBets
With Intel Core i7, hes just getting started
twitchquotes:
Think he cant clutch through a smoke while recording in full resolution and streaming the play to the world? Watch this. Think u cant get famous in a flash like become your own meme famous? Watch this. Think hes been there, done that? With Intel Core i7, hes just getting started.
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IM DELETING YOU, BROTHER!
twitchquotes:
IM DELETING YOU, BROTHER! ββ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 10% complete..... ββββββββ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 35% complete.... ββββββββββββ]]]]]]]]]]]] 60% complete.... βββββββββββββββββ] 99% complete..... π«ERROR!π« π―Trueπ― Brothers of Islam are irreplaceable βͺI could never delete you Brother!π Send this to ten other πͺMujahideenπͺ who would give their lives for ο·²Allahο·² Or never get called βοΈBrotherβοΈ again If you get 0 Back: Juhanam for you π«β β‘π« 3 back: you're off the martyr listβοΈπ¦ 5 back: you have pleased Allah greatlyβͺπ¦ 10+ back: JANAHο·²!ο·²!ππβͺπ
π
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