[Copypasta] Sleeping in bed with your parents

twitchquotes: Question for those in chat: Let's say you are sleeping in bed with your parents. You are in the middle. You wake up and want to get up, but you notice that you are partially inserted into your mom and your dad is partially inserted into you and they are still asleep. Which way do you thrust to get out?
twitch chat
November 2019
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Joker

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–β–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘ ░░░░▄▀░▄░▐▐▄▀▄▀▒░░░▀░░░░▀░▄▀▐░░ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–β–β–€β–„β–€β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–Œβ–β–β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–Œβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–β–„β–€β–‘β–€β–„β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–β–‘ β–‘β–β–β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–β–‘β–Œβ–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œ β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–β–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€ β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–β–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–β–‘β–Œβ–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–β–‘β–Œβ–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–„β–β–„β–‘β–‘
ascii art
November 2014

Called my overweight female friend a heckin chonker today and now she won’t talk to me

My female friend was crying about how fat she was and I was trying to comfort her by telling her that she didn’t look that fat but she kept accusing me of lying to make her feel bad so I thought that saying β€œmaybe your just a heckin chonker” would cheer her up and lighten the mood but she just looked at me and left. I hope she realised that I was only being nice and that she is being irrational.
August 2021

Do you know who I am? I am a 4.0 STEM Major

twitchquotes: Do you know who the fuck you're talking to right now? I'm a 4.0 STEM major with a full ride to a top ten university. I'm in the 97th percentile of IQ intelligence (the test wouldn't go any higher). I literally tip the scales with my intelligence. I am the furthest thing from a "twitch chat idiot".
twitch chat
July 2014
Reynad

Year 2025, Riot takes over the world

twitchquotes: The year is 2025, Riot has finished acquiring Facebook and Google as well as the country of Germany, making it the first nation in terms of GDP. All games, electronic devices, appliances and vehicles are to be produced and purchased from Riot only, failure to do so may result in being set to League Reformation Camps.
twitch chat
October 2019

League of Legends

MoonMoon subs in all my streams spamming emotes

twitchquotes: Fucking MoonMoon subs in all my streams spamming these stupid fucking emotes. I swear they're all 12 year old kids who subbed to this goofy ass mother fucker (who's not even good at the game, just a decent tank player who gets carried) with their mom's credit cards they stole. If I see one more goddamn purple face I think I'm going to scream. My AGDQ chat experience has been ruined time and time again by these spammers and frankly, I'm getting tired of it.
twitch chat
August 2017
MOONMOON
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