[Copypasta] Sleeping in bed with your parents

twitchquotes: Question for those in chat: Let's say you are sleeping in bed with your parents. You are in the middle. You wake up and want to get up, but you notice that you are partially inserted into your mom and your dad is partially inserted into you and they are still asleep. Which way do you thrust to get out?
twitch chat
November 2019
I used to be a real ad
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The Moon isn't so great?

twitchquotes: The Moon isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw an astronomical object with such an ability and movement within the celestial plane? The Moon puts the eclipse game to another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a planet with its skill and passion for moving in front of things again. The Sun breaks records. Earth breaks records. The Moon breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.
twitch chat
June 2019

Kripp and Tony Gambino Casino in Reno

twitchquotes: ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴅᴀʏ ᴏᴄᴛᴀᴠɪᴀɴ, ᴀʟ ᴘᴀᴄɪɴᴏ ʜᴇʀᴇ, ᴄᴀʟʟɪɴɢ ɪɴ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴏɴʏ ɢᴀᴍʙɪɴᴏ ᴄᴀsɪɴᴏ ɪɴ ʀᴇɴᴏ. ɪ'ᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘᴀᴘᴀʀʀɪɴᴏ ᴛᴏ sᴛᴀʀ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀᴛᴇsᴛ ᴏғ ᴍʏ ᴛʀɪᴏ ᴏғ ɴᴇᴏ─ᴘᴏʀɴᴏʀɪɴᴏs, "ғɪʟɪᴘɪɴᴏ─ʟᴀᴛɪɴᴏs sʜᴏᴠɪɴɢ ᴊᴀʟᴀᴘᴇɴᴏs ᴜᴘ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ᴘᴇᴇ─ʜᴏʟᴇs ૩,"ᴅɪʀᴇᴄᴛᴇᴅ ʙʏ ϙᴜᴇɴᴛɪɴ ᴛᴀʀᴀɴᴛɪɴᴏ. ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴍᴇ ᴀ ᴄᴀʟʟ, ᴀᴍɪɢᴏ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Dear Kripparian, how dare you

twitchquotes: Dear Kripparian, how dare you... I have dedicated my life to Hearthstone. I am a proud Hearthstoner and so are the rest of your fans. You cannot betray us and start playing a Hearthstone competitor. I can fall asleep to your HS streams because of how casual it is, but this game is too complicated and it keeps me awake. If you betray us we will rise up, you have been warned.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Krippler and the Donger people

twitchquotes: Krippler's aim is to establish a New Order of absolute Nazi German hegemony in the Twitch Metaverse. To this end, his foreign and domestic policies had the aim of seizing Lebensraum ("living space") for the Donger people. Under Krippler's rule, in 1941 German forces and their European allies occupied most of Europe and North Africa.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Hey Kripp, this is Jessica from Vegan Heritage Corp

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, this is Jessica from Vegan Heritage Corp. We scanned our ancestry data-base and it appears you're related to the dinosaur known as Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur from 194 B.C We have tried contacting him, but it appears he died from a giant 'Meat-eor' sent from Villa the Spaghettisaurus from space. We fear he's making giant meatballs again, we recommend going carnivorous or earth could be doomed again!
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp
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