[Copypasta] Sleeping in bed with your parents

twitchquotes: Question for those in chat: Let's say you are sleeping in bed with your parents. You are in the middle. You wake up and want to get up, but you notice that you are partially inserted into your mom and your dad is partially inserted into you and they are still asleep. Which way do you thrust to get out?
twitch chat
November 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Hello Mr TidesofTime, this is Google's manager Gabe Horn

twitchquotes: Hello Mr TidesofTime, this is Google's manager Gabe Horn here. We have received word you are singing to your viewers. As a Streamer on our newest acquisition, Twitch, your voice is now copy-righted. Please stop immediately. Thank you.
twitch chat
August 2014
TidesOfTime

WHERE IS SODAPOPPIN?

twitchquotes: γƒ½ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½οΎ‰ PANTS ARE DOWN, DICK IS FLOPPIN, WHERE THE FUCK IS SODAPOPPIN γƒ½ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½οΎ‰
twitch chat
May 2019
sodapoppin

RNGesus who art in Hearthstone

twitchquotes: RNGesus who art in Hearthstone, Random be thy game. Thy random come, Thy turn be done, on Azeroth as it is in Hearthstone. Give us this day our daily quest, and forgive us our misplays, as we forgive those who queue as hunter and lead us not into fatigue but deliver us from zero. For thine is the random, and the mulligan, and the topdeck, always yet never, Ameno.ο»Ώ
twitch chat
May 2016
Reynad

Hearthstone

Meanwhile in Kripp's mouth

twitchquotes: Meanwhile in Kripp's mouth ~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ ~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’ γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€~β€’ ~β€’ γ€€ γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€ ~β€’ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear β€œwe’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is β€œyes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeΓ±os, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing