[Copypasta] Sleeping in bed with your parents

twitchquotes: Question for those in chat: Let's say you are sleeping in bed with your parents. You are in the middle. You wake up and want to get up, but you notice that you are partially inserted into your mom and your dad is partially inserted into you and they are still asleep. Which way do you thrust to get out?
twitch chat
November 2019
I used to be a real ad
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This player doesn't even use a monitor

I've seen [insert player here] play, he doesn't even use a monitor. He visualizes the map in a detailed rendering, completely in his mind. He has a biological wallhack; his godlike perception highlights all enemies within light-years. His eyes are closed as his mouse gracefully swerves across the table, making immaculate twitches as he flicks from head to head. The bullets that escape his gun barrel are surgical; each making a deadly strike in between his opponent's eyes.
July 2022

CSGO

Valorant

I sexually Identify as TheLegend27

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as TheLegend27. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the armies of my enemies hurling big, hard boulders at disgusting cavalry. People say to me that a person being TheLegend27 is Impossible and Iā€™m *** retarded but I donā€™t care, Iā€™m beautiful. Iā€™m having a plastic surgeon install Game of War: Fire Age, trebuchets and 90kg stones on my body.
twitch chat
January 2017

I sexually Identify as

DL aka ā€œDropped Liabilityā€ is an ex-ADC player for TL

twitchquotes: DL aka ā€œDropped Liabilityā€ is an ex-ADC player for TL that is often ridiculed for his inability to use the summoner spell Flash. He is specifically known for his ā€œEveryone is trashā€ mindset, which he only recently realized applied mostly to himself.
twitch chat
March 2020
Doublelift

League of Legends

Sleeping naked is a power move anyways

Sleeping naked is a power move anyways. ā€¢ ā Burglar breaks in boom Iā€™m up and naked. Heā€™s too distracted trying to determine if Iā€™m a man or woman because of my massive bush to notice me reaching for my glock fawty. ā ā€¢ ā When I pee or poop in my sleep from the nightmares I donā€™t get any clothes dirty just the sheets. ā€¢ ā Save money on not having to run an AC in the summer time so I can buy my wife more lingerie for her boyfriend to appreciate.
August 2021

Joker fursona bodyguard

twitchquotes: Okay CLEARLY sakurai is playing favorites already wtf. Joker is literally bayo, cloud, olimar put together. He gave him a GUN for gods sake and you LMFAO you canā€™t even hurt his fursona bodyguard ohmygod
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

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