[Copypasta] Sleeping in bed with your parents

twitchquotes: Question for those in chat: Let's say you are sleeping in bed with your parents. You are in the middle. You wake up and want to get up, but you notice that you are partially inserted into your mom and your dad is partially inserted into you and they are still asleep. Which way do you thrust to get out?
twitch chat
November 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Hello chat I am famous fascist leader, Adolf Hilterino

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴄʜᴀᴛ ɪ ᴀᴍ ғᴀᴍᴏᴜs ғᴀsᴄɪsᴛ ʟᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ, ᴀᴅᴏʟғ ʜɪᴛʟᴇʀɪɴᴏ. ᴡᴇ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴀᴢɪ ᴍᴏᴅs ᴛᴏ ᴘᴀʀᴛɪᴄɪᴘᴀᴛᴇ ɪɴ ᴏᴜʀ ɴᴇᴡ ᴘʀᴏᴘᴀɢᴀɴᴅᴀ ғɪʟᴍ "sɪᴇɢ ʜᴇɪʟ ʟɪғᴇsᴛʏʟᴇ" ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʀᴀɪsᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴀᴢɪ ᴍᴏᴅs sᴀʏ ɴᴏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ ᴀɴᴅ ʙᴀɴʜᴀᴍᴍᴇʀ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Unsponsered Art of Conquest stream

twitchquotes: It is the 2018 Oscars and Tom Hanks stands at the podium to announce Best Actor. “Boy,” he says, “we got a real competition this year! Johnny Depp, Leo DiCaprio, George Clooney, anyone could win!” The world holds its breath to see who will win the most prestigious acting award in the world. “Wow!” says Hanks. “I don’t believe it! The winner is Kripparrian in his ‘Unsponsered’ Art of Conquest stream!”
twitch chat
January 2018
Kripp

sellout

Wave the flags

twitchquotes: <\_ Kappa _/> wave the flags like a boss <\_ Kappa _/>
twitch chat
November 2014

War Thunder is like playing chess

It's not that the game is addicting, it's just that there are no decent alternatives. War Thunder is basically the intellectual version of the FPS games that all the stupid children and mongoloid brains play. Instead of just being based purely on twitch "skills" which require as much intellectual ability as closing popup spam windows, in War Thunder you have to use at least some tactics and strategy. FPS games are like playing Pong on high speed. War Thunder is like playing chess. The art of gaming is simply dead for big brains. 20 years ago there were tons of games that required brainpower because PC gaming back then was by nerds and for nerds, but then the corporate suits took over and were like "broaden the appeal to we can make more sales" so everything got dumbed down to the lowest common denominator. My GF asked me if I was "having fun" playing War Thunder, and I looked at her like she was a fucking retard to even consider that sentence a valid question. I don't have FUN playing War Thunder. This game routinely pisses me off and makes me rage. However, when I stomp the entire enemy team and crush them so utterly I can hear the lamentations of their mothers, I feel satisfaction. I spent weeks grinding for Operation Winter. The vikings had a word for this. They called it Valhalla. Endless war. Endless combat. Knowing only victory and death. Bathing in the blood of your enemies. You get 15 kills and bask in glory and rewards, and think: what should I do now? Should I get in my Honda Fit and tour the local strip mall for my Triumph? Should I microwave some tendies and throw myself a great Feast? But there is only one option. There is only ever one option. To Battle! Various cultures have alternatively described the gameplay loop of War Thunder as their vision of Heaven or Hell. It is both.
January 2021

Super Meat Boy v2

⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣦⣶⢶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠛⢿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡟⠡⠂⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠘⠁⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⢠⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣗⢴⣶⣷⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣗⣄⣼⣷⣶⡄⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⡅⠐⣶⣦⣶⠀⢰⣶⣴⣦⣦⣶⠴⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣷⣬⡛⠷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣭⣭⣥⣭⣵⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠙⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⢛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
October 2020
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing