[Copypasta] Coke Gaming ad script

twitchquotes: Oh my god, what the hell? what's going on? What, oh my god. Coke, are you serious right now? COKE GAMING WHAT! You are invited to the Twitch Partner Program! HI, I Just got partnered. We got partnered boys. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! What! Coke Gaming, what Is this? 10,000 bits? Coke Gaming, thank you so much for the 10,000 bits! Thanks. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you Coke.
twitch chat
December 2019
Script of super annoying Coke Gaming ad that was constantly played on Twitch
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
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as a person who has lots of sex all the time

as a person who has lots of sex all the time, i can say that this game is 100% accurate to having sex with sexy women. like i do. everyday. this game did not make me horny however. i am not gay. i just have too much sex with real women to spend more than 15 minutes in this game. on the other hand i would recommend this game to people who do not have sex (unlike me because i have lots of sex with women a lot) as there is a naked woman in it and she is naked. she kinda looks like one of my many girlfriends who i have sex with a lot. i have lots of sex. i also an very handsome and women ALWAYS want to have sex with me because i am very muscular and handsome and very good at video games. all my girlfriends say im very good at sex and playing video games and being handsome. one of my girlfriends asked me to have sex with her but i told her i was playing a sex game instead so she started crying and became a lesbian and killed herself because i did not have sex with her. i have sex with women. not men. i am not gay. i am very cool and handsome so girls always have sex with me because i am very cool and sexy. my penis is very big. all my girlfriends like my penis because it is very big and i am very good at sex with my women. every woman ive had sex with is very sexy and so am i. i have lots of sex. i am also very handsome and sexy and i have lots of sex.
September 2021

Female Amogus Crewmate

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⠛⠋⠉⣭⠙⠳⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠟⠙⣀⣠⡤⠶⠶⠶⠾⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⡏⠀⢸⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⣿⡇⠀⠸⣧⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡿⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣧⡀⠀⠉⠙⠛⠛⠶⢶⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠙⠛⣿⣶⣶⢤⣤⣤⠿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡾⠟⠉⢉⣛⢶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣿⣤⣄⣀⢸⣿⠆⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠏⠍⠀⠀⢹⣿⠈⣿⠀⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠏⠈⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⣿⠀⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡟⠐⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⡇⠀⣻⡇⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣅⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠃⠀⣿⣇⢻⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣤⣄⣀⣀⢀⣼⡟⠀⢰⣿⢿⢼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⠟⠛⠛⠻⠿⠿⠛⠀⠀⠈⣿⢸⣆⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡀⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣼⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠛⠛⠷⠦⣄⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⡯⡄⠀⠀⠀⣰⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⠀⠀⢂⣀⡻⣦⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣧⠁⠀⠀⢠⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣧⣤⡶⠿⠙⢹⣿⠃ ⠀⠀⣀⣻⣷⣦⣤⣴⣿⣷⣤⣀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣾⠿⠛⠉⠁⠀⣠⣶⡿⠋⠀ ⣴⡿⢯⠅⠉⣹⣿⠟⠛⠙⠻⠿⠿⠿⠟⠋⠁⠀⣀⣤⣴⠿⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀ ⠙⢿⣷⣤⣤⣿⣷⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣠⣴⡶⠟⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠻⠿⠛⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
May 2022

Among Us / Amogus

If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021

I'm not a fan of any team in particular

twitchquotes: I'm not a fan of any team in particular. I'm just a fan of whoever plays the best League of Legends and right now that just happens to be Rush from Echo Fox. Show some respect.
twitch chat
March 2019

League of Legends

Now I am nolife

twitchquotes: ▬▬ι═══════ﺤ As I ʜᴏʟᴅ ᴛʜᴇ sᴀᴍᴜʀᴀɪ sᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏ sᴛᴏᴍᴀᴄʜ ᴀs I ᴡᴀs ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴄᴏᴍᴍɪᴛ sᴜᴅᴏᴋᴜ, I ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ᴘʟᴀʏ Cᴀsᴜᴀʟsᴛᴏɴᴇ... I ʀᴇᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ᴀ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ Kʀɪᴘ ᴡᴀs Nᴏʟɪғᴇ... ɴᴏᴡ I ᴀᴍ Nᴏʟɪғᴇ...ɢᴏᴏᴅ ʙʏᴇ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ -═══════ι▬▬
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
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