[Copypasta] Just hit gold and I feel really dangerous IRL

twitchquotes: Last night I hit Gold rank in League of Legends, Summoner's Rift for the first time. Today, when I went on my walk to my standard retail job, idk I felt like I had this new edge to me that wasn't there before. I went from a triangle to a square pretty much. Have any other LoL overachievers ever felt this way before? It's like my rank is strapped to my waist and now whenever people are at risk of passing me on the sidewalk, they skirt over to the other side in a tizzy. At work, someone tried to shoplift some Almond Joy. When I caught him, I yelled "hey!" And he looked at me and scoffed, like, "whatever dude, don't be a hero." I put a hand on my hip and said "I'm not a hero, I'm a jungler." He dropped the candy bar and ran to his getaway vehicle. I recorded the plate and called the police.
twitch chat
January 2020

League of Legends

What happened to this ad? :(
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twitchquotes: HELLO FLY? πŸ“ž 4Head TSM HERE πŸ“ž 4Head WE FOUND TL AT THE AIRPORT MC DONALDS πŸ“ž 4Head WE ARE WAITING FOR YOU πŸ“ž 4Head WIFI PASSWORD 0-6
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Don't feel too bad after Team Liquid destroys G2

twitchquotes: Hey EU fans, don't feel too bad after Team Liquid absolutely destroys G2 tonight. Being the 2nd best region in the world (after North America of course) is still something to be very proud of! πŸ™‚
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May 2019
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Classic

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Professional Iron Players league

twitchquotes: I think it's really nice that Riot Gamesβ„’ provides iron players a league to play "professionally" in. They even let this so called "LCS" participate at Worlds with up to 3 teams! It really shows how progressive Riot Gamesβ„’ really is.
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July 2020
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Yuumi this, Yuumi that

twitchquotes: Yuumi this, Yuumi that... For fucks sake chat you do this every time a new champion comes out. Everybody says they are too weak and need buffs. Michael is the ONLY one who goes against the grain to show you that indeed the 27% winrate is a myth and will demonstrate that perfectly clearly how it should be closer to 10%...
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May 2019
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Text-to-Speech Playing