[Copypasta] I apologize, as my English is rather substandard

twitchquotes: I apologize, as my English is rather substandard At what whereabouts were you when the popular browser video game Club Penguin shut down? I was in mine place of residence, when my communications device informed me that someone wanted to contact me. "Club Penguin, the popular browser MMO has shut down." "I disagree"
twitch chat
January 2020
Variation of this copypasta: https://www.twitchquotes.com/copypastas/3256
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I saw Kripp at the tavern yesterday

twitchquotes: I saw Kripp at the tavern yesterday. I told him it would be cool to see him play arena again. He said, “Why, so you can snipe me at 8 wins?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I thought he was going for a brofist, so I extended my hand only to have it slapped away in disgust. Later on I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen murlocs in his hands without paying.
twitch chat
May 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

copy: pastad

gamer head: on knuckles: cracked gaming goggles: on arms: stretched gamer girl pee: drinked girlfriend: none gay best friend: invited wife: beaten wife: cheated on daughter: abandoned child: destroyed your mom: fucked rockets: launched funding: secured anime: loved Japan: nuked HIV: positive blood: donated American genocide: denied milf: hunted milfs: lewded babies: yeeted emerald splash: deflated society: segregated Israel: destroyed heroin: shot milk: consumed mother: donuted father: robbed identity: hidden traitor: kakyoined Italian drug trade: monopolized masters: awaken Caeser: killed left wing: destroyed lib: owned hog: cranked pants: shid bottom: text top: text Hotel: Trivago Hotel: Mario Duke: Nukem cer: armic balls: crushed balls: ligma the imposter: sus sussy: balls Gucci: gang Delivery: Digiorno Peterbilt: gassed Half: life pog: gers Vaporeon: cool :) edit: spelling
August 2021

If two virgins fuck...

If two virgins fuck and take each other's virginity, shouldn't they still have one each? Because, think about it... The definition of take is to capture and receive something, like, if little Bob got 10 dollars and I rudely took it from him, he'd most likely cry, but I'd also gain 10 dollars since I took 10 dollars from him, no? Shouldn't it be the same with virginity, but hopefully, just without the crying? You take a virginty and lose one in the process, so it should be plus-minus zero, I should still have one virginty left? So if I only fuck virgins, will I be a virgin forever? And can I have multiple virginities if I take from other virgins?
September 2021

I, an atheist, accidentally said “oh my g*d” instead of “oh my science”

I, an atheist, accidentally said “oh my g*d” instead of “oh my science” You read the title, I just cannot believe I said the “g” word on accident. Am I even an atheist anymore? I don’t like religion or anything but like maybe it infiltrated me and is manipulating me to say “oh my g*d” instead of “oh my science”. Please guys it wasn’t me, I didn’t mean it. I’m very disappointed in myself, I think I need to go to science camp or go to therapy. What if I’m secretly religious? what should I do? Is my foreskin going to fall off?? Please can someone give me advice, any advice is appreciated. Best regards, -an atheist(?)
November 2020

NOT EVERYONE CAN WEAR HAT

twitchquotes: PartyHat NOT EVERYONE IN THE CHAT CAN WEAR HAT FeelsGoodMan
twitch chat
November 2019
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