[Copypasta] I apologize, as my English is rather substandard

twitchquotes: I apologize, as my English is rather substandard At what whereabouts were you when the popular browser video game Club Penguin shut down? I was in mine place of residence, when my communications device informed me that someone wanted to contact me. "Club Penguin, the popular browser MMO has shut down." "I disagree"
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January 2020
Variation of this copypasta: https://www.twitchquotes.com/copypastas/3256
I used to be a real ad
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Hello Kripp, Flute Guy here. TUTURURU

twitchquotes: Ｈｅｌｌｏ Ｋｒｉｐｐ， Ｆｌｕｔｅ Ｇｕｙ ｈｅｒｅ． Ｊｕｓｔ ｗａｎｔｅｄ ｔｏ ｓａｙ： ♩♬～♪ ＴＵＴＵＲＵＲＵ ♩♬～♪ ． ♩♬～♪ ＴＵＴＵＲＵＲＵ ♩♬～♪ ． ♩♬～♪ ＴＵＴＵＲＵＲＵ ♩♬～♪ ． ♩♬～♪ ＴＵＴＵＲＵＲＵ ♩♬～♪ ． ♩♬～♪ ＴＵＴＵＲＵＲＵ ♩♬～♪ ． ♩♬～♪ ＴＵＴＵＲＵＲＵ
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

Tomato Town Police Report

The residents of Tomato Town need your help identifying two suspects who were about to get down while involved in an event on Monday evening. Ten people were eliminated, and the two suspects, one injured, left the scene headed Southbound and were later spotted at a local park. The two suspects were armed with golden scar ARs and were “hitting that chug jug” as several witnesses stated. Please alert local Tomato Town authorities with any information regarding the duo.
March 2021

Fortnite

Joe Biden eat hot chip and lie

twitchquotes: He lets out a sigh and then a plastic smile. “Under the Biden administration,” he says, carefully “There will be a few new rules. It will be forbidden to cook,” The crowd gasps. “Everyone will have to eat McDonalds,” Jill hangs her head in shame. “You may have to charge your phone. You may have to twerk. Hell, you may even have to be bisexual.” An uproar starts in the crowd, but Biden ushers a silence with his next words “But it will all be worth it when we as a people can eat hot chip and lie. Thank you.” Biden leaves the podium to a thunderous applause. America is saved.
twitch chat
November 2020

KFC

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣋⣭⣥⣭⣭⣍⡉⠉⠙⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠁⠠⠶⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠄⢀⡴⢊⣴⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠙⡟⠁⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣎⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢻⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⡇⠰⠟⠛⠛⠿⠿⠟⢋⢉⠍⢩⣠⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿ ⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠰⠁⣑⣬⣤⡀⣾⣦⣶⣾⣖⣼⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿ ⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠨⣿⠟⠰⠻⠿⣣⡙⠿⣿⠋⠄⢀⡀⣀⠄⣀⣀⢀⣀⣀⢸ ⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⠄⠚⠛⠉⠭⣉⢁⣿⠄⢀⡿⢾⣅⢸⡗⠂⢿⣀⡀⢸ ⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⢧⣄⠄⣻⣿⣿⣾⠟⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸ ⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⡀⠄⠄⣿⣿⠟⢁⣴⣿⢸⡄⠄⢦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⡀⣼ ⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⡸⣿⠒⠄⠈⠛⠄⠁⢹⡟⣾⡇⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⣠⣴⣦⠄⠄⢸⣷⡹⣧⣖⡔⠄⠱⣮⣻⣷⣿⣿⠄⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠸⠿⠿⠚⠛⠁⠂⠄⠉⠉⡅⢰⡆⢰⡄⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⠄⣷⠘⣧⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣄⣀⣀⡀⠄⣀⣀⣹⣦⣽⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
November 2018

Equal rights equal fights

I (15M) was walking from school to home today and a girl (15F) kicked my leg. So yeah I was walking to home today and that bitchass girl kicked my leg. It didn't hurt too much it was more like a fly landing on me as my super muscly body protected me. But anyway, as a person that believes in gender equality I punched her a lot harder with my super muscly manly man fists and knocked her out, kidnapped her to my school's chemistry lab at night, then with my super smart brain I composed HCl (hydrochloric acid for those uneducated inferior peeps) with my super chemistry knowledge. I then dipped her in my glorious acid just like any gender equality believing sigma male would. Equal rights equal fights my dear superior reddit using sigma male friends.
May 2022
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