[Copypasta] I apologize, as my English is rather substandard

twitchquotes: I apologize, as my English is rather substandard At what whereabouts were you when the popular browser video game Club Penguin shut down? I was in mine place of residence, when my communications device informed me that someone wanted to contact me. "Club Penguin, the popular browser MMO has shut down." "I disagree"
twitch chat
January 2020
Variation of this copypasta: https://www.twitchquotes.com/copypastas/3256
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Stroll in my local GameStop

stroll into my local GameStop looking to pick up a copy of Binding of Isaac grab the game and take it to the charming maiden at the register "Pardon me, milady...but could you ring me up? A shame I don't have your number or I'd ring you up instead..." she giggles and takes the game, blushing as her fingers brush mine due to my fingerless gloves her eyes widen as she reads the game's title "Wow, I've never seen anyone buy this before! You must have special taste!" I smile and ready a witty response when suddenly a voice rings out from behind "Hahaha look at what this ♥♥♥♥♥♥ is buying! That's not Call of Duty Advanced Memefare! What a piece of ♥♥♥♥!" I quickly turn around, my cloak billowing behind me, to discern the source of the rude outburst generic dudebro caricature with a sports team cap and "the guy that beat you up that one time behind the school in early October" shirt is standing there guffawing "Excuse me sir...you may disparage my person if you wish, but it is untoward to swear in front of a lady." "♥♥♥♥ you ♥♥♥♥♥♥!" I smile quietly and tip my fedora low across my eyes, concealing them "As you wish..." I quickly swing my cane into his kneecap before he can react he bellows and charges forward I expertly sidestep him and the cashier screams as he crashes into the counter I draw my sword-cane and mutter a quiet oath as I drive it deep into his back "...requiescat in pace..." As I clean my blade the girl walks out from behind the counter, twirling her hair with her fingers "So...maybe you'd like to come over to my place to play that game sometime...? "No thanks, milady, it's only single player. Besides..." I sheath my sword "You're not my type." skate away on my Heelys
January 2021

Classic

I've achieved so much that you'll never come close to

twitchquotes: I've achieved so much that you'll never come close to. Your life is fucking empty, which is why you're relishing this little bit of attention you're getting from someone. You spent an evening tweeting inane opinions and reactions into the void. Let me know when reality kicks in.
twitch chat
May 2019

Hypers

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠉⠙⠋⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠈⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⠁⠀⢠⣶⡷⠶⠚⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠻⡃⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⣿⣿ ⣿⠁⠀⠠⠟⠉⠀⣀⠤⠤⠤⢤⣉⠉⢀⣠⠤⠒⢒⠶⠚⠓⠀⠈⠓⢦⡀⠀⠈⣿ ⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠴⠋⠀⠀⢀⡠⠤⠌⣀⣀⡀⠄⠊⠁⣠⠄⡀⠈⠻⣶⣄⢻⠀⠀⢸ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠞⢁⣤⢠⡄⢨⠹⣿⣷⡄⣾⣿⠀⠄⠘⠂⣿⣿⢣⠀⠀⢸ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠉⠀⢴⣿⣿⠀⠂⠈⠀⠸⠟⠘⠻⠿⠆⠀⠀⠀⠈⡰⡿⠀⠀⢸ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣉⣉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣴⡿⢧⡇⠀⣾ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣯⣙⣛⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⢛⣛⣋⣭⣥⡖⡿⠁⠀⢠⣿ ⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿ ⣿⡀⠀⠀⠐⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣤⡶⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡏⣾⣦⣄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢹⣿⣿ ⣿⣇⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⣼⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣶⣯⣭⣭⣽⣟⣛⣛⣛⣛⣿⣿⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣫⣭⣭⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
September 2020

Pepe

The giant salt monster known as Kripp

twitchquotes: All this salt has formed into the giant salt monster known as Kripp. For all the salt of the ocean can not keep him at bay. Blame RNG and lose! Then go to cast another player cause you can't play. The salt is real, the salt is kripp, and thats why he losses.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

.future gens will sit down and listen to...

twitchquotes: people sit with their children, tell them memories about mario, zelda, half life , dark souls, god of war , silent hill, resident evil , metroid.....future gens will sit down and listen to tales of T-Posing, fortnite dances and frying pans in battle royal games....and teach their kids the carlton and listen to the back pack kid and his flossing song.....may god have mercy on us all...
twitch chat
November 2019
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