[Copypasta] Don't ever smoke

twitchquotes: My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your stream gave me cancer anyway.
twitch chat
January 2020

Classic

(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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How do I get my husband to stop going โ€˜Goblin Modeโ€™ during sex?

How do I get my husband to stop going โ€˜Goblin Modeโ€™ during sex? TLDR; My husband says โ€˜Goblin Mode activatedโ€™ when we start to have sex, growls and acts like a caveman, and then says โ€˜Goblin Mode offโ€™ when we stop, and then pretends not to remember afterward. I really love my husband and heโ€™s always been great in bed. But recently heโ€™s been acting really weird. So, a couple of days ago, my son went on a rampage through our house and said he was in โ€˜Goblin Modeโ€™. We didnโ€™t really know what to do with him, so we sent him to live with my parents so he can go to a special needs school. My husband a really great relationship with our son and loved him more than anything. Naturally, he was upset when he had to leave. Heโ€™s an incredibly tough man, but this was the first time Iโ€™ve ever seen him cry. I think since then, heโ€™s been a little emotionally unwell. Iโ€™ve heard him muttering, โ€˜Goblinโ€™ repeatedly when he didnโ€™t notice me, staring blankly into his food, and just going alone by himself to do who knows what. I feel awful for him, but we both agreed that this was for the best. Last night, the day after our son went away, we decided to have sex to relieve our stress. However, my husband said โ€˜Goblin Mode activatedโ€™, starting growling, and went wild having sex with me. Admittedly, it was some of the best and most experimental sex Iโ€™ve ever had, but Iโ€™m worried that something might be going on with my husband. Any advice? Edit: The problem isnโ€™t the โ€˜Goblin Modeโ€™, itโ€™s that he could be ill
July 2022

Confessions

Classic

Oops I dropped my CONGA LINE

twitchquotes: Oops I dropped my CONGA LINE ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ CONGA LINE ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ CONGA LINE ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ CONGA LINE ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ CONGA LINE ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ
twitch chat
October 2015

Classic

Why is six afraid of seven? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam

Why is six afraid of seven? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. He can seldom close his eyes without opening them again at fear of Charlies lurking in the jungle trees. Not that you could ever see the bastards, mind you. They were swift, and they knew their way around the jungle like nothing else. He remembers the looks on the boys' faces as he walked into that village and... oh, Jesus. The memories seldom left him, either. Sometimes he'd reminisce - even hear - Tex's southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes like nothing else. He always kept a pack of Lucky's with him. The boys are gone, now. He knows that; it's just that he forgets, sometimes. And, every now and then, the way that seven looks at him with avid concern in his eyes... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. Makes him feel like he's back there... in the jungle.
August 2021

Classic

i think its hilarious u kids talking shit about reynad

twitchquotes: i think its hilarious u kids talking shit about reynad. u wouldnt say this shit to him at lan, hes jacked. not only that but he wears the freshest clothes, eats at the chillest restaurants and hangs out with the hottest dudes. yall are pathetic lol.
twitch chat
August 2016
Reynad

Classic

ALERT INCOMING DANK MEME

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ”Š๐Ÿ”Š๐Ÿšจ๐ŸšจWARNING๐Ÿ”Š๐Ÿšจ๐ŸšจWARNING๐Ÿšจ๐Ÿšจ๐Ÿ”ŠTHIS IS A ๐ŸธDANK ๐Ÿ‘ฝMEMEโ—โ— ๐ŸธALERT. INCOMING ๐ŸธDANK ๐Ÿ‘ฝMEME๐Ÿธ ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘ŒHEADING STRAIGHT ๐Ÿš€๐Ÿš€YOUR WAY. ๐Ÿ”œ๐Ÿ‘†๐Ÿ‘†๐Ÿ‘†PLEASE TAKE ANY PRECAUTIONS๐Ÿšง๐Ÿšง NECESSARY TO PREPARE YOURSELF FOR THIS ๐ŸธDANK ๐Ÿ‘ฝMEMEโ—โ— ๐Ÿธ ๐ŸŒ‹๐ŸŒ‹๐ŸŒ‹ .BUCKLE UPโ™ฟโ™ฟโ™ฟ THEM SEATBELTS๐Ÿ‘ฎ๐Ÿ‘ฎ,PUT THEM CELLPHONES ON SILENT๐Ÿ“ต๐Ÿ“ต AND LOOSEN THAT ANUS๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฉ๐Ÿฉ๐Ÿ’ฉ๐Ÿ’ฉ CUZ THIS MEME JUST CAME STRAIGHT OUT OF THE ๐Ÿšฌ๐Ÿšฌ ๐Ÿ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿ๐Ÿšฌ๐ŸšฌDANK FACTORY.
twitch chat
May 2016

Emoji Pasta

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