[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
I used to be a real ad
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TriHard v2

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠟⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠉⠻⠿⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠹⢿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⠏⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⡇ ⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⡇ ⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠇ ⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠃ ⣇⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀ ⣿⣿⣤⣤⡄⠄⠄⣠⣬⣼⣯⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⣿⣯⣔⣆⣠⣍⣿⣿⣿⡿⣛⡉⡐⠄⣀⣤⣾⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢤⣿⣀⣁⡄⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠈⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⣿⣿⣿⣆⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⡀⢋⢩⣙⣛⣿⣿⡟⠉⠋⠛⠛⢋⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⢼⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡥⡠⢒⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠅⢡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡈⣿⣿⣯⣭⣭⣡⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣉⣉⣛⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
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June 2019

You've been gnomed 3

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣏⠄⡠⡤⡤⡤⡤⡤⡤⡠⡤⡤⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣗⢝⢮⢯⡺⣕⢡⡑⡕⡍⣘⢮⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡧⣝⢮⡪⡪⡪⡎⡎⡮⡲⣱⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⢸⡳⡽⣝⢝⢌⢣⢃⡯⣗⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠹⡽⣺⢽⢽⢵⣻⢮⢯⠟⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡟⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠽⠽⡽⣽⣺⢽⠝⠄⠄⢰⢸⢝⠽⣙⢝⢿ ⡄⢸⢹⢸⢱⢘⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⣀⠄⠄⣵⣧⣫⣶⣜⣾ ⣧⣬⣺⠸⡒⠬⡨⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣽⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⠡⠑⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠠⢀⢀⢀⡀⡀⠠⢀⢲⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢐⢀⠂⢄⠇⠠⠈⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠠⠈⢈⡄⠄⢁⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠠⠐⣼⠇⠄⡀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⠄⠄⡀⠈⠂⣀⠄⢀⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⣀⠐⢀⣸⣷⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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December 2018

Pokemon Marathon Season 2 Intermission

twitchquotes: ResidentSleeper HOLD IT ResidentSleeper HOW PREDICTABLE ResidentSleeper THIS IS BORING ResidentSleeper NOT MY SHOULDER ResidentSleeper VERY SCARY-O ResidentSleeper THIS IS BORING AGAIN ResidentSleeper UNINTELLIGENT ResidentSleeper ?????? ResidentSleeper WANNA SHARE MY BLANKET ResidentSleeper
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September 2018

Pokemon Marathon 2018

Sheldon says BAZINGA

"I've never been a fan of Internet Explorer" Crowd laughs nervously and a few grunts are heard from the back seats as people edge closer to hear the punchline. "Why not? Don't you like the internet?" The crowd suddenly stands up, aware that they are about to receive what they came for. People slowly edge closer to the set as Sheldon prepares for his next line. Sweat is clearly visible on his brow and his mouth is quivering in anticipation as he readies himself for what is about to happen. "I just prefer Firefox because, like the fox, I am cunning and nimble." The crowd suddenly surges forward as the words escape Sheldon's mouth. They are so powerful, they almost shake the very foundations of the CBS studios. He watches as, in what he perceives as slow motion, the crowd moves toward his fragile body. He has been preparing for this moment his whole life. This is his moment. This is his Emmy. This is his Golden Globe. This is even his Oscar. The crowd converges around him so quickly they ignore the trampled cries of Leonard and Penny, who now lie shaking on the floor, their bones crushed by the sheer mass of the crowd. Sheldon stares back at the eyes around him. What he sees are no longer people. What he sees is the human psyche stripped down to its core. Their lives, what they were before this moment has been forgotten. Ravenous. Hungry. They want one thing from him. Sheldon closes his eyes, clears his mind and relaxes his body. What happens next depends completely on the next few seconds. The time between this and what he mutters next feels like an eternity. Slowly, he opens his eyes. He looks at Leonard, then at Penny, both lying lifeless on the floor. Without a second thought, he says with resounding conviction... "BAZINGA" In a split second, the crowd pounces on his ready and waiting body. Man, woman, child all at once. Sheldon cries out in complete ecstasy as they consume his flesh. He stops suddenly, as he drifts into eternal slumber. Peace at last.
April 2021

Okay hand sign cock

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February 2021

NSFW

Summon The Hydra

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