[Copypasta] Tesla is restarting production today

twitchquotes: Tesla is restarting production today against Alameda County rules. I will be on the line with everyone else. If anyone is arrested, I ask that it only be me.
twitch chat
May 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

My SUSSY POWERS ARE AWAKENING

My SUSSY POWERS ARE AWAKENING ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜Ž Part 1. I just did my daily jackoff โ˜บ๏ธ to my impostor body pillow, ๐Ÿ˜ฑ but when I came, ๐Ÿ‘ป I started floating, ๐Ÿ˜ฑ and think I got teleported into the skeld. ๐Ÿ˜ฎ I swear for a second I felt the imposter's strong hands grip my asscheeks.๐Ÿคค ๐Ÿ‘ ๐Ÿ‘ I immediately was transported back to earth, ๐Ÿ˜ญ and I instantly got on all fours on my bed naked, ๐Ÿคช as you would, and started screaming in my best efforts to summon the imposter ๐Ÿ’ช โ€œIM READY FUCK ME FUCK ME FUCK ME FUCK ME PLEASE DADDY IMPOSTERโ€ I was so close to feeling the imposters sweet cock fuck the shit out of me ๐Ÿคค but then my NAZI RACIST mother came in and beat the shit out of me. ๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ™โ˜น๏ธ She then said I was going to a magical place called the โ€œmental asylumโ€ ๐Ÿค” Iโ€™m not too sure where that dimension is located but it sounds EPIC ๐Ÿ˜ฎ
April 2022

Among Us / Amogus

A girl... AND a gamer?

A girl.... AND a gamer? Whoa mama! Hummina hummina hummina bazooooooooing! *eyes pop out* AROOOOOOOOGA! *jaw drops tongue rolls out* WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF *tongue bursts out of the outh uncontrollably leaking face and everything in reach* WURBLWUBRLBWURblrwurblwurlbrwubrlwburlwbruwrlblwublr *tiny cupid shoots an arrow through heart* Ahhhhhhhhhhh me lady... *heart in the shape of a heart starts beating so hard you can see it through shirt* ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum *milk truck crashes into a bakery store in the background spiling white liquid and dough on the streets* BABY WANTS TO FUCK *inhales from the gas tank* honka honka honka honka *masturabtes furiously* ohhhh my gooooodd~
March 2021

Classic

This chat is now in CUTE mode

twitchquotes: โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€” AYAYA This chat is now in CUTE mode AYAYA โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”
twitch chat
August 2018

Weebs

I'm going all in boys!

twitchquotes: แ••โ”Œโ—•แ—œโ—•โ”แ•— IM GOING ALL IN B O Y S! ส• อกยทแดฅ อกยท ส” Yแต’แต˜ Oแถฐหกสธ Lแถคแต›แต‰ Oแถฐแถœแต‰ ส• อกยทแดฅ อกยท ส”
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Elon Musk could've given $5 billion to everyone in the world

Musk poured $44 billion into Twitter. The global population is 8 billion people. He could have given $5 billion to each individual and still had money left over. Most people's lives would be changed if they received a $5 billion check. But he squandered it all on Twitter.
July 2022
Text-to-Speech Playing