[Copypasta] I fucking hate Stuart Little

twitchquotes: I fucking hate Stuart Little. I know what you’re thinking, this is some kind of funny joke, but no. Stuart Little is a piece of shit. A damn rat got picked over actual children at an orphanage and he’s supposed to be a hero? And I can’t even tell you how many damn times I’ve seen a great parking space only to turn the corner and realise Stuart Little is already parked there in his stupid little fucking convertible. He took my wife and the kids and my house and my job. I swear to fucking god, I’m going to kill myself and take that goddamn rodent to hell with me. Stuart Little has ruined my family. Last summer, I approached the miserable mouse in the street, and asked him for his autograph, because my son is a huge fan. The fucking rat gave me the autograph and told me to burn in hell. Later, when I gave my son the autograph he started crying and said he hated me. Turns out the mousefucker didnt write his autograph, no, he wrote “you’re a piece of shit, and i fucked your mom”. I’m now divorced, and planning a huge class-action lawsuit against the white devil that ruined my life. Your time is almost over, Stuart. All the people you’ve wronged will rise against you.
twitch chat
May 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Salt season pass

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Don salteroni from Sodium enterprises, we would like to remind you to renew your season pass as soon as possible if you would like to continue receiving daily shipments of table salt, best regards Don salteroni. pls no PJSalt
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December 2014
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Fairy tale of Reynard and Lea

twitchquotes: Let me tell you the fairy tale of Reynard and Lea. Once there was a magical salt-shaker named Reynard. He lived in a magical kitchen where the princess Lea would make sandwiches. One day Lea shook Reynard too hard and he broke, spilling salt everywhere. BibleThump
twitch chat
November 2014
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Dear kripp. My daughter is a very big salt fan

twitchquotes: Dear kripp. My daughter is a very big salt fan, and I was wondering if you can call her name, her pretty little name, its "HAFU"out with your strong, vegan voice. please don't copy paste this, it's personal...
twitch chat
May 2015
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Howling Wolf

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠁⠸⢳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠃⠀⠀⢸⠸⠀⡠⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠃⠀⠀⢠⣞⣀⡿⠀⠀⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⡖⠁⠀⠀⠀⢸⠈⢈⡇⠀⢀⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠩⢠⡴⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡶⠉⠀⠀⡸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠎⢠⣇⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⢀⠄⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠏⠀⢸⣿⣴⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣆⣀⢾⢟⠴⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠀⠠⣄⠸⢹⣦⠀⠀⡄⠀⠀⢋⡟⠀⠀⠁⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⠁⢠⠀⣿⠃⠘⢹⣦⢠⣼⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣴⠫⠤⣶⣿⢀⡏⠀⠀⠘⢸⡟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠐⠿⢿⣿⣤⣴⣿⣣⢾⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢣⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣨⣟⡍⠉⠚⠹⣇⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢦⠀⠀⢀⡀⣾⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⠟⣹⣧⠃⠀⠀⢿⢻⡀⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⣦⡀⣸⣆⠀⣾⣧⣯⢻⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⣰⣿⣿⡄⡆⠀⠀⠀⠳⣼⢦⡘⣄⠀⠀⡟⡷⠃⠘⢶⣿⡎⠻⣆⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡟⡿⢿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠀⠻⢯⢷⣼⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⡄⡈⢆⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⣿⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⢹⢿⡀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠛⠓⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠼⠇⠁
January 2024

I sexually identify as Ninja Fortnite Gaming

I sexually identify as Ninja Fortnite Gaming. Ever since I was young, I've dreamed of understanding "the pain of being famous", and producing shitty keyboards. People say to me that he was only popular in 2017, but I disagree. He will always have a special place in my heart. From a young age, I knew I was different. Dying my hair blue, being overly cocky, and stealing others' identities were just a few of my favorite childhood pastimes. I'm just not like other guys. From now on, I want you guys to call me Ninja Fortnite Gaming (Tyler Blevins is not acceptable). My pronouns are fort/nite. If you don't use or respect them you're a gamephobe griefer and need to try out his new skin and Gfuel flavor Chug Jug to become more culturally sensitive. Use code NINJAYT for 30% off your order today. Thank you for being understanding.
April 2022
Ninja
Text-to-Speech Playing