[Copypasta] I fucking hate Stuart Little

twitchquotes: I fucking hate Stuart Little. I know what you’re thinking, this is some kind of funny joke, but no. Stuart Little is a piece of shit. A damn rat got picked over actual children at an orphanage and he’s supposed to be a hero? And I can’t even tell you how many damn times I’ve seen a great parking space only to turn the corner and realise Stuart Little is already parked there in his stupid little fucking convertible. He took my wife and the kids and my house and my job. I swear to fucking god, I’m going to kill myself and take that goddamn rodent to hell with me. Stuart Little has ruined my family. Last summer, I approached the miserable mouse in the street, and asked him for his autograph, because my son is a huge fan. The fucking rat gave me the autograph and told me to burn in hell. Later, when I gave my son the autograph he started crying and said he hated me. Turns out the mousefucker didnt write his autograph, no, he wrote “you’re a piece of shit, and i fucked your mom”. I’m now divorced, and planning a huge class-action lawsuit against the white devil that ruined my life. Your time is almost over, Stuart. All the people you’ve wronged will rise against you.
twitch chat
May 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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Captain Cucumber of the Vegan Police

twitchquotes: DatSheffy 📢 ATTENTION, OCTAVIAN MOROSAN! This is Captain Cucumber of the Vegan Police! You have been accused of violating the Supreme Vegan Charter by drafting beast cards in your arena decks and forcing them to fight for you! This is a blatant act of animal exploitation and is punishable by death! Surrender peacefully and we will make it a quick and painless one! This is your only warning!
twitch chat
December 2017
Kripp

Classic

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No one: Not a single soul: This video: exists This comment: hold my beer Me: so you have chosen death Death: that's a big yikes from me dawg Also death: I wasn't expecting special forces Me: mom can we have death Mom: we already have death at home Death at home: surprised pikachu face This video literally makes me cry every time Who else is watching this in ???? This video: wait that's illegal Also this video: why do I hear boss music??? Thumbs up so he sees this comment in 14 years when this video gets recommended! Edit: thanks for the likes XD
December 2020

Classic

Kripparrian has ripped in the aether

twitchquotes: Today, November 25, 2014 marks the day that kripparrian has ripped into the aether. He was hit in the head by a Riot Gas thrown by Ferguson Police all the way from US. Please join me as we all fist ourselves without Lube in his remembrance BibleThump
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

THATS RIGHT IM TALKING ABOUT EU LUL

twitchquotes: OUR TEETH ARE EWWWWW LUL THE PEOPLE WHO WATCH US ARE FEW LUL SJOKZ IS THE ONLY GOOD THING TO VIEW LUL THATS RIGHT IM TALKING ABOUT EU LUL
twitch chat
August 2018
Riot Games

League of Legends

EU vs NA

Positive streamers only

twitchquotes: Hi Mewnfare, it's Cliff, from Blizzard. Heard you were having some issues with matchmaking in our game. Our records show you aren't on our Streamer Prime servers, due to the notes 'Salt mine Overlord' and 'Hots Suggardaddy' Flagged on your account. I regret to inform you only positive streamers can play with a proper matchmaking today. Feel free to submit an appeal to our support team.
twitch chat
November 2020
mewnfare
Text-to-Speech Playing