[Copypasta] Annoying Lit mobile YouTube ad

twitchquotes: So lit mobile just sent me this solar wireless battery pack, I'm excited, lets see whats inside. I really like the build its got really nice grips on the side, its shock proof, and water resistant. The power bank has 20,000 milliamps which can fully charge your phone up to eight times. Its also got a convenient loop for carrying. on the back of the device we have a bunch of solar panels which can charge the battery bank in about 60 minutes. On the top of the device, there are 3 usb ports and 2 of them are fast charging. If you hit the power button 2 times, the led light comes on. If you hit the power button once, the led lights will tell you how much battery you have. There's a micro usb port on the side for fast charging. My favorite part of this device is that it charges my phone wirelessly. there's a red light indicator at the top to let you know that your phone is charging.
twitch chat
May 2020
I used to be a real ad
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May 2021

God I wish Winston was real

twitchquotes: God I wish Winston was real. I want him to sit on my face with his furry ass. I want him to yell "THE POWER OF SCIENCE" as he thrusts into me. I want him to spam "OH YEAH" when we're finished. God if Blizzard made life-sized cutouts of Winston I would buy them all for myself and keep them in my basement for my pleasure. God I wish Winston was real.
twitch chat
March 2018

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McDonald's BTS Meal

So I was listening to my favorite boy band called 'BTS (I am an army)' on my Samsung earbuds (BTS Edition) using my Samsung Galaxy s20+ (BTS Edition) in my room plastered with BTS poster. Suddenly one of my Army friends (we are BTSSexual and BTSGender) told me that there is a McDonald's BTS meal which almost made me jizz my pants. I ran to McDonald's to buy the BTS meal and came back home. Even though I am an Army (I would have bought their feces if they were selling it), this is intolerable. That was the most uncreative meal ever created. I wish McDonald's would have put Ass-Hair of each members of the band and hidden it in Chicken McNuggets. Like "Hey! I got Jimins Ass-hair in my chicken nuggets! Can't wait to get Kim Teahyung's Ass-hair so I can take his DNA sample and recreate a clone of Kim Teahyung to overrule the world with #Army". bts #army #blm #gaypride #arianagrande
June 2021

have you ever had a dream like this?

have you πŸ‘‰πŸΏ ever 😠 had a dreams πŸ˜΄πŸ’­- thats βœ”- that you πŸ‘‰πŸ»πŸ‘€ uhm 😀 you πŸ‘ˆ had you πŸ‘ˆ- you πŸ‘ˆ could- you πŸ‘ˆ do what you πŸ‘‰ want 😍- you πŸ‘ˆ could do- so you πŸ‘ˆπŸ‘¦- you πŸ‘ˆ do- you πŸ‘ˆ could do you πŸ€–πŸ‘ˆ- you πŸ‘ΈπŸ‘‰ wan πŸ”‘- you πŸ‘ΈπŸ‘‰ want πŸ˜‹ him πŸ‘΄ to do so much πŸ”₯ that you πŸ‘‰ could do anything πŸ’°?
April 2021

Emoji Pasta

Kripp please supply the world with some salt

twitchquotes: Dear nl_Kripp with the Earth's salt mines running low near depletion. We can always rely on you for stepping up to the plate and supplying the world with some PJSalt
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing