[Copypasta] Does anyone else bite their Switch?

twitchquotes: Does anyone else bite their Switch? This is not a shitpost, I really do this. I don't like to rage when I'm playing online, so when something really annoying happens and I get pissed, I try not to yell or punch something. Instead, I keep a straight face and I angrily bite into my switch for a few seconds until my anger is released. The best part of this is that Nintendo seems to have built the Switch with this in mind, because the plastic material seems completely resistant to my teeth. Legit, there are never teeth marks even mere minutes after the initial chomp. What I'm wondering is, does anyone else here do the same? Am I the only munching smash player? I hope I've inspired someone to try the same, it's a super good way to take your anger out without damaging anything or making noise!
twitch chat
July 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Now I remember why I fell asl...

twitchquotes: Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes. His face comes closer as he plants his wet lips onto mine. We are locked together in a beautiful display of love. Then I wake up. I look at Kripp's stream. He is playing Mill Druid. Now I remember why I fell asl... ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Investing in gourd futures

Due to local fluctuations in the tropopause, the jet stream has been shifting rapidly in a counterclockwise vector, causing a rapid disincorporation of the Hadley vortex cells in the lower ionosphere. Because of this, the geostrophic solar wind balance has deteriorated rapidly in the northern hemisphere. In essence, autumnal weather patterns in the western United States will lead to the biggest ornamental gourd yield in recorded history. Investing in gourd agricultural futures could likely produce up to $1600 per day in passive income. However, investing at the apex of the curve would be the most conducive to profit as the arbitrage (particularly 12b-1 fees) will develop at a market share higher than the back-end load. Basically, no one will be able to buy the stock at a higher price than you, and all value invested will be retained. A preliminary market penetration investment of $50,000 would be most efficient in generating this revenue.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Monkey D. Luffy

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠤⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⠤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡲⢋⠝⠋⣛⣳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⠠⣴⠗⢀⠥⠂⢁⠤⠤⠤⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣛⠛⠉⠗⠒⠲⢤⣀⠀ ⠰⠃⠐⠀⠋⡠⠀⠮⠤⠤⠤⠤⡤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣽⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡆ ⠀⠜⠀⠀⠈⠀⢠⣤⣔⣒⡒⠒⠂⠁⠀⡀⢀⣀⣤⣶⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡼⠀ ⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⢄⡴⠋⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠋⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣴⡊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⡠⠐⠉⢸⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⡻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠁⠀⠀⣿⢹⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣙⠋⠴⠛⣿⢛⡿⠬⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠘⠹⣿⣿⠛⠛⠛⢿⡇⠀⠉⠀⠘⠉⢰⣯⡊⠙⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠱⡄⠀⠀⠘⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠛⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⢲⣄⠀⠒⠂⠀⣀⢴⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣈⠀⢻⣿⣶⣴⣾⡟⢸⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⡎⠀⢀⣠⡤⠂⢠⠈⢿⣿⡿⣿⠃⠀⠙⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠙⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠉⠉⢇⠀⠈⡇⠘⣏⠀⡿⡰⠀⠀⢀⠛⠛⠻⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠉⠉⠉⠗⠒⢿⡀⠸⡈⣠⠧⠞⠉⡏⠉⠉⠉⢹⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠉⠉⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
May 2022

One Piece

I am Pakistan

twitchquotes: ´ellu oddone. i am pakistan. i spek not so very best englend sorry. i like watch you pley. you bestest jungler in laegue of legend. i want become yuo pls tech me to pley . i want become bester pleyer pls oddone tech me
twitch chat
July 2014
TheOddOne

My name is Octavius Kripparius Muridius

twitchquotes: My name is Octavius Kripparius Muridius, commander of the PJSalteers of the North, General of the Salty Legions and loyal servant to the TRUE emperor, Saltarrian. Father to a Flamestriked son, husband to a Top decked wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this stream or the next.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing