[Copypasta] Hello this is Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon

twitchquotes: Hello this is Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon™. As many of you know, we have recently bought over "Twitch tv". Users must now buy 'Emotes' such as " Kappa ", " Kreygasm " and " FrankerZ ". If users proceed to use these emotes without buying and owning them, we will have to, not only remove the account of the user but also, shut down the stream we have evidence that is has been used in. Thank you, do not copy and paste this. This is business, kid.
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie
I used to be a real ad
More imaqtpie Copypastas

Hi Michael, it's the ghost of Abraham Lincoln here

twitchquotes: Hi Michael, it's the ghost of Abraham Lincoln here, 16th president of the USA. Just wondering if you can let me see your minimap. I realize you don't like "ghosting" but maybe you can make an exception for me. Sorry for spooking you.
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

Good Morning

twitchquotes: ( ͡ʘ╭͜ʖ╮͡ʘ) GOOD MORNING ( ͡ʘ╭͜ʖ╮͡ʘ)
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie

I will tell Michael to ban you all

twitchquotes: Hello twitch chat. This is michaels mother speaking. Please stop the spam in the chat. I can't read the amazing conversations that you are having about my son. Thanks. Don't copy and paste this to spam more or I will tell Michael to ban you all.
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Lord Voldemort has infiltrated the Dignitas house

twitchquotes: Michael, this is Dumbledore, Lord Voldemort has infiltrated the Dignitas house and killed Scarra. The legend says the one that carrys the mark of the donger on his forehead is destined to stop the dark lord. Please Michael avenge Scarra!
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

Riot disables LOLalerter

twitchquotes: Mr Sanatana, This is Riot, we found out that you have released many of these so called "Dank memes" into our chat so we are disabling LOLalerter for you untill you grow up into an Adulterino and stop trollerino
twitch chat
March 2015
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing