[Copypasta] 69 nice

twitchquotes: Oh you think you’re funny eh? Yeah you’re so funny commenting nice on a number that represents reproduction. Yeah so funny. Wouldn’t it be nice if somebody came at your doorstep at 4:20 am with a bat that has 69 written on it? Yeah that will be as funny as your joke.
twitch chat
October 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Flex Tape

twitchquotes: To show you the power of Flex Tape, I SAWED THIS BOAT IN HALF and repaired it with only Flex Tape. Not only does Flex Tape's powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong, water-tight seal so the inside is completely dry. YEE DOGGIE! Just cut, peel, stick, and seal. Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!
twitch chat
August 2018

This is a routine PokiW check

twitchquotes: Hello sir. Do you know why I've stopped you? You haven't done anything wrong. This is just a routine PokiW check, sir. May I see your Twitch sub badges and username, please? Thank you. Now let's see that PokiW, hmm? Go ahead, type it in chat. No funny business. Dot the I and capitalize the W. I better not see an emote, son. Or you're off to jail.
twitch chat
September 2021
Pokimane

Brazilian No. 1 Futbol Player Eduardo Pasterinho

twitchquotes: Wᴇʟʟ ᴍᴇᴛ Kʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀɪᴀɴ! Iᴛ ɪs I, Bʀᴀᴢɪʟɪᴀɴ Nᴏ. 1 ғᴜᴛʙᴏʟ ᴘʟᴀʏᴇʀ Eᴅᴜᴀʀᴅᴏ Pᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴʜᴏ. Aғᴛᴇʀ ᴍʏ ᴛᴇᴀᴍ ɢᴏᴛ ᴡʀᴇᴄᴋᴇᴅ ʙʏ ᴛʜᴇ Gᴇʀᴍᴀɴ ᴛʀʏʜᴀʀᴅs, I ғᴇᴀʀ ғᴏʀ ᴍʏ ᴊᴏʙ. Pʟs ʜᴇʟᴘ ʙʏ ᴅᴏɴᴀᴛɪɴɢ sᴀʟᴛ ᴏʀ ᴛᴏᴘᴅᴇᴄᴋɪɴɢ ᴍʏ sᴀʟᴀʀʏ. Pʟs ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘᴀ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴʜᴏ
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Discord user cracks after seeing the word “sus”

oh my god among us isnt FUCKING FUNNY ANYMORE ITS BEEN MONTHS MONTHS IM SICK OF THIS SHIT JUST FIND SOMETHING ELSE PEOPLE OH MY GOD EVERYTHING ABOUT AMONG US IS UNCOOL LITERALLY EVERYTHING IT SCREAMS “IM A VIRGIN” AND GODDAMNIT THAT WHEN THE IMPOSTER IS SUS SHITB ITS NOT FUNNY ITS A DUDE ON METH WHY DO PEOPLE LAUGH AT THIS LIKE WHAT THE HELL BRO PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD HOLY SHIT HUMANITY IS FUCKed THIS IS AN ABSOLUTE ALL TIME LOW OH MY FYCKING LOOORDDD DUDE @everyone STOP MAKING AMONG US JOKES ITS NOT FUCKING FUNNY holy shit fuck anybody who finds among us funny im done with this shit
July 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Fortnite Creepypasta (DO NOT RESEARCH)

Fortnite.EXE ctepypasta (do not read at 3AM VERY SCARY!!!) So i loaded up fort nite as usal.... but when i get to the lobby... therr is jonsy! He has black eyes and dark smiling mouth.... when i go to item shop... there is only one item... it is called BLOOD and cost 666 v buck. When i click on it... hyper relistic blood appeared on my screen!!! Then ramirez jumpscared me and fotnite crashed and deleted itself.... I havent dared to open game after that...
December 2020

Fortnite

Text-to-Speech Playing