[Copypasta] 69 nice

twitchquotes: Oh you think you’re funny eh? Yeah you’re so funny commenting nice on a number that represents reproduction. Yeah so funny. Wouldn’t it be nice if somebody came at your doorstep at 4:20 am with a bat that has 69 written on it? Yeah that will be as funny as your joke.
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October 2020
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Anime girl 14

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠠⠄⠤⠐⠚⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠓⠢⠤⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠤⣖⣶⣭⣷⣼⣄⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢐⣫⣭⣴⣶⣦⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣪⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⠻⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣩⣿⣿⡟⣿⣠⣼⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⢸⣤⣼⣿⣿⠻⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⣿⣿⡟⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⠏⠀⢹⣿⡄⠀ ⠀⠈⢿⣿⡃⠀⠀⠀⠉⢁⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣀⠈⠀⠀⠀⢰⠟⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠉⠗⠖⠀⠊⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠒⠀⠐⠆⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣒⣢⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣝⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣻⠎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠳⣈⡭⠭⣭⠴⠚⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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May 2020

Weebs

Hey, Vsauce, Michael here!

Hey, Vsauce, Michael here! Down here. But which way is down? And how much does down weigh? Well, down weighs about 1/100 of a g/cm3 . It is light, and airy, which makes it a great source of insulation and buoyancy for waterbirds. But if you let go of down, it falls down. So that's which way down is, it's the direction that gravity is pulling everything. Now for someone on the other side of the Earth, my down is their up, but where are falling things going? Why do things fall? Are they being pushed or pulled? Or, is it because of TIME TRAVEL.
March 2020

Response to "go fuck yourself"

What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
April 2020

Classic

FeelsStrongMan

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠉⠁⠈⠉⠙⠻⢿⡿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠙⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠠⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠑⠪⡖⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⠶⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⢔⡢⠍⠉⠉⠩⠭⢑⣤⣔⠲⠤⠭⠭⠤⠴⢊⡻⣿ ⡿⠁⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⣤⠭⠓⠊⣁⣤⠂⠠⢀⡈⠱⣶⣆⣠⣴⡖⠁⠂⣀⠈⢷⣮⣹ ⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⢳⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣿⡿⢿⣿⣇⣀⣥⣤⠤⢼⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡟⠑⠚⢹⡟⠉⣑⠒⢺⡇⡀⠀⡹⠀⠀⣀⣴⣽⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⣿⠒⠉⠀⠀⢠⠃⠈⠙⠻⣍⠙⢻⡻⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣘⡄⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠘⡇⠀⠀⠀⠘⡄⠀⢱⢸⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡀⠀⠾⣟⣻⣛⠷⣶⣼⣥⣀⣀⣀⠀⢧⠀⠀⠀⠠⣧⣀⣼⣴⢽⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠹⡙⠛⠷⣿⣭⣯⣭⣟⣛⣿⣿⣿⣛⣛⣿⣭⣭⣾⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡀⠀⠀⣇⠀⠉⠉⠉⡏⠉⠙⠛⠛⡿⣻⣯⣷⣿⣿⣿ ⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⡸⠁⣠⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⣷⣤⣄⣈⣆⣤⣤⣧⣶⣷⣿⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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September 2020

Pepe

When Kripp plays Reno warrior...

twitchquotes: Captain's log, entry 69, stardate 420. It has been 9001 days since the SS Kripp first entered into this game of hearthstone, and still there appears to be no signs of release, no way out. I fear for the lives of myself and my crew, we may all pass of old age before we are freed from this particular game.
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November 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

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