[Copypasta] spamming copypastas is the worst form of comedy

twitchquotes: Honestly, spamming copypastas is the worst form of comedy to exist on this planet. Instead of original jokes, we just have repetitive trash. As a stand up comedian, I spend hours on my craft making sure I make original jokes. I always leave the comedy club with the hottest bros. Maybe you copypasta people can learn something from me.
twitch chat
October 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Kripp from the future

twitchquotes: BibleThump HEY ITS KRIPP FrOM the future here trying to tell you to stop playing this childrens game while you can. IF NOT you will play this game for 40 years in a row and it will take a toll on your health. i have been declared clinacly insane and have been staying at a looney bin forced to eat meat everyday BibleThump
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

It's already priced in

twitchquotes: Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
twitch chat
April 2020

My husband said I have "boy pussy."

My husband said I have "boy pussy." I am a biological woman and a female. I haven't spoken to him since. For context we were having sex, and at some point with his eyes closed he moaned "yeah that boy pussy..." and then stopped, realising he spoke out loud. I'd feel better if he mentioned another woman because we're (somewhat) open but I'm pretty sure he's bisexual and instead of speaking to me about it, fantasizes about me being a twink.
May 2022

Fantastic AoE2 player

twitchquotes: "Streamer's name" is a fantastic player, he only needs to work on his scoutings, build orders, strategy choices, eco management, army compositions, control groupings, unit splits, xbow dances, mangonel attack grounds, monk micros, knights surroundings, galley fights, laming, clicking precision, building placements, not getting housed, map bans and civ choices.
twitch chat
July 2020

Age of Empires II

What is left of the Kripp we all loved?

twitchquotes: Ｎｏ ＰｏＥ， ｎｏ ｃａｔｔａｒｒｉａｎ， ｎｏ ＯＪ， ｎｏｔ ｎｌ． Ｗｈａｔ ｉｓ ｓｔｉｌｌ ｌｅｆｔ ｏｆ ｔｈｅ ｋｒｉｐｐ ｗｅ ａｌｌ ｌｏｖｅｄ？ Ｎｏｗ ｈｅ ｐｌａｙｓ ｃａｓｕａｌｓｔｏｎｅ， ｆｉｓｔｓ ｓｕｂｓｃｒｉｂｅｒｓ， ｄｒｉｎｋｓ ｍａｎｇｏ ｊｕｉｃｅ ａｎｄ ｐｌａｙｓ ｆｏｒ ＴＳＭ
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
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