[Copypasta] spamming copypastas is the worst form of comedy

twitchquotes: Honestly, spamming copypastas is the worst form of comedy to exist on this planet. Instead of original jokes, we just have repetitive trash. As a stand up comedian, I spend hours on my craft making sure I make original jokes. I always leave the comedy club with the hottest bros. Maybe you copypasta people can learn something from me.
twitch chat
October 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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yang gang for life

twitchquotes: If my girl 👩 and yang 🤓 both drowning 😱 and I can only save one 😢 catch me with my 1000 extra a month 🤑🤑 because it's yang gang for life 😤😉😌😌
twitch chat
August 2019

Emoji Pasta

Avoid embarrasing incidents

twitchquotes: Hey chat, take it easy please. Sometimes I see the same message posted twice. Take your time to actually read chat to avoid embarrassing incidents like this. Thank you. :)
twitch chat
December 2018

Classic

mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020

Moai statue head

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠊⠉⠉⢉⠏⠻⣍⠑⢲⠢⠤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣻⣿⢟⣽⠿⠯⠛⡸⢹⠀⢹⠒⣊⡡⠜⠓⠢⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡜⣿⣷⣽⠓⠀⢠⢂⣣⠋⠂⣾⠼⢌⠳⢄⢀⡠⠜⣣⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢻⢱⣭⠷⠤⢅⠴⣡⡻⠃⠀⢠⠁⠀⢀⡱⠜⠍⢔⠊⠀⠹⡄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣷⠌⠚⠷⠆⠠⠶⠭⢒⣁⠀⣤⠃⣀⢔⢋⡤⠊⠑⣄⠳⣄⠀⣧⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠦⣀⡤⣄⠄⢄⣀⣠⣒⢦⡄⠩⠷⠦⠊⠀⠀⠀⠈⠣⡏⠢⣿⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⢫⠟⣝⠞⣼⢲⡞⣞⠋⠋⠉⠋⠓⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣨⠂⢸⡅ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠃⡨⠊⢀⡠⡌⢘⢇⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂⠡⡄⠀⠀⢀⠞⢁⠔⢹⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣣⠞⢀⠔⢡⢢⠇⡘⠌⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡌⠢⡔⢁⡴⠁⠀⢸⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⠟⠁⠠⢊⠔⣡⢸⠀⠃⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣯⠂⡀⢪⡀⠀⠀⢸⠀ ⠀⢀⠔⣁⠐⠨⠀⠀⠈⠀⢄⠘⡀⠀⠈⢆⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⢁⠜⠙⢦⠙⣦⠀⢸⠀ ⡴⠁⠘⡁⣀⡡⠀⠀⠴⠒⠗⠋⠉⠉⡆⠀⠆⠄⠄⠘⠀⡎⠀⠀⠀⠑⢅⠑⢼⡀ ⢯⣉⣓⠒⠒⠤⠤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠐⠁⠀⠀⠀⠒⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⣌⣇ ⠀⠈⢳⠄⠈⠀⠤⢄⣀⠀⢈⣉⡹⠯⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠂⠀⠀⡠⠚⣡⡿ ⠀⢠⣋⣀⣀⣀⣀⠤⠭⢛⡩⠄⠒⠩⠂⢀⠄⠀⠀⠀⠈⢢⡀⠀⡠⠋⡩⠋⠀⢳ ⠀⢹⠤⠬⠤⠬⠭⣉⣉⢃⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⡞⢺⡈⠋⡢⠊⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⠀⠈⡆⠁⢀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠋⠉⠓⠂⠤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡧⠊⡠⠦⡈⠳⢄⠀⠀⠈ ⠀⠀⢹⡜⠀⠁⠀⠀⠒⢤⡄⠤⠔⠶⠒⠛⠧⠀⠀⡼⡠⠊⠀⠀⠙⢦⡈⠳⡄⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⠆⠀⠈⠀⠠⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢄⠈⢲ ⠀⠀⢸⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡄⠊⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡢⣸ ⠀⠀⠈⠳⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠁⠒⠁⠀⠠⣏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣔⠾⡿⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠙⠛⠒⠤⠤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣔⣢⣀⣉⣂⣀⣀⣠⠴⠿⠛⠋⠀
ascii art
October 2021

Hi Toast, this is Volibear's son

twitchquotes: Hi Toast, this is Volibear's son. Please Toast, could you give my dad some time off? I never get to play with him anymore ever since patch 9.14. I remember all the fun we used to have before he was so busy, he used to teach me chain attacks and always said "I never say no to a good ol cursed blade!". Whenever he comes home he seems too tired to play, his attack speed is 15% less! Since he left my mom's not been the same and she hits me, she'd never do this if my dad was here. Please Mr Toast.
twitch chat
July 2019
DisguisedToast

Teamfight Tactics

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