twitchquotes:
any female born after 1993 can’t cook… all they know is mcdonald’s , charge they phone, twerk, be bisexual , eat hot chip & lie
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Leaf Of Legend
twitchquotes:
Hello mr michael "ImAPie" santana i am writing to tell you how removing adblock make me better at "Leaf Of Legend". i remove adblock and see add for "Skillcap". Skillcap help me become bestest LoL player in Somalia - Bronze 4. Worth sell wife.
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imaqtpie
Kripp's stream is like watching paint dry
twitchquotes:
How the ever loving *** is this guy getting 24k people to watch him play HS? It's like having a small country collectively decide to grow an interest in watching paint dry. Boggles the mind. Really.
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Kripp
Comedy God has entered the building: Attack Helicopter
I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter
WEE WOO WEE WOO
ALERT! COMEDY GOD HAS ENTERED THE BUILDING! GET TO COVER!
steps on stage
Bystander: "Oh god! Don't do it! I have a family!"
Comedy God: "Heh..."
adjusts fedora
the building is filled with fear and anticipation
God and Jesus himself looks on in suspense
comedy god clears throat
everything is completely quiet not a single sound is heard
world leaders look and wait with dread
everything in the world stops
nothing is happening
comedy god smirks
no one is prepared for what is going to happen
comedy god musters all of this power
he bellows out to the world
"ATTACK"
absolute suspense
everyone is filled with overwhelming dread
"HELICOPTER"
all at once, absolute pandemonium commences
all nuclear powers launch their nukes at once
giant brawls start
43 wars are declared simultaneously
a shockwave travels around the earth
earth is driven into chaos
humanity is regressed back to the stone age
the pure funny of that joke destroyed civilization itself
all the while people are laughing harder than they ever did
people who aren't killed die from laughter
literally the funniest joke in the world
then the comedy god himself posts his creation to reddit and gets karma
Classic
HELP MY DONGER IS ON FIRE
twitchquotes:
( ͡°̢ ̒ʖ͉ ͋°)̃ ͗H̟E͢L̓P͗ ͈M͙Y͕ ́D̿O͝NG̭E͋R̰ ͜I͝Ș ̏ON̡ ͨF̊I͂R͆E̓ ͠( ͡°̶ ͜ʖ̽ ͘°͗)͉
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imaqtpie
Scary Reddit alien
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡯⠄⢀⣄⣤⣀⡀⠄⢼⣿⣿⡄⠄⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠂⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠉⠙⠉⠄⣠⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠋⠄⠘⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⠿⠛⠉⠉⠛⠛⠉⢀⣀⣤⣤⣦⣶⣶⣶⣶⣴⣤⣤⣀⡀⠉⠛⠛⠉⠉⠙⠻⣿
⡏⠄⣴⣾⠓⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠹⣿⣦⠄⠈
⡇⠐⢿⠁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⠫⠩⡙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⠍⡛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠈⡿⠃⠄
⣿⡄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣗⣅⣵⣔⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣢⣑⣐⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⢠⣾
⣿⡇⠄⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣻⣿⢿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⢸⣿
⣿⣿⡄⠄⠝⣞⠯⣟⡿⣼⠫⡶⠸⠖⠃⠛⠢⠆⠖⢭⢫⣾⣻⣝⢷⠛⠄⢠⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣆⡀⠈⠫⡫⡟⣿⡂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣯⣟⢗⠝⠁⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⡀⠈⢫⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢸⣿⡳⠅⠁⣀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠓⣿⡤⡘⠰⠰⢘⣠⣿⠇⠅⠠⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⢀⠑⠝⢽⣙⣘⠵⠏⠃⡀⢡⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⡤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿