[Copypasta] Apology letter from the condom factory

twitchquotes: What in the actual rainbows is wrong with your brain? Did you IQ test return with negative results or something? I’m getting closer and closer to believing that your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. Jesus Christ. Love the content keep it up.
twitch chat
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Can the mods ban us all?

twitchquotes: can :thinking: the :thinking: mods :thinking: ban :thinking: us :thinking: all :thinking:
twitch chat
January 2017

MODS

Classic

LCS PODCAST STARTS NOW ResidentSleeper

twitchquotes: LCS PODCAST STARTS NOW ResidentSleeper 40 MINS BETWEEN GAMES ResidentSleeper SUCH A SHAME WHEN GAMES INTERRUPT TALKING ResidentSleeper FAKE NARRATIVES ResidentSleeper FORCED HYPE ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
September 2020
LCS

League of Legends

The year is 2037. Ligma is now the name of a real disease

The year is 2037. Ligma is now the name of a real disease. You're a doctor you just got the test results of the patient it's just as you feared it's fatal, your patient has ligma you're crying but you can't stop laughing you know you have to tell your patient that he has ligma but you can't keep a straight face you have to go out therr and tell your patient that he has only three days left to live and that there's no cure no hope not even enough time for him to finish his bucket list or find love or get the life he's always wanted he started making progress, he was doing well, his future had high hopes but he has a fatal case of ligma and you can't keep a straight face you walk out to your patient, "s-sir," you say through snickers "yes doctor? what are my test results?" your patient replies "I-I'm very sorry to say but," you respond as your sentence gets interrupted by a loud snort. "it's f-f-atal." you can't hold your laughs and you let out a bit of laughter "Is this some kind of joke? are you some sadistic creep? why the fuck are you laughing" the patient shouts out you "you h-have a fatal case of l-l-ligma," you can't hold it in anymore, you burst out laughing, you're rolling on the floor, tears in your eyes, you pee yourself a little "what the fuck is wrong with you? you're horrible! fuck you! go to hell!" your patient replies, with a face of horror, disgust, anger and sadness. he starts to cry. he's shaking you scream at the top of your lungs, "LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! LIGMA BALLS!" you can't stop laughing and shouting, over and over again you repeat "LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS!" your patient flees, he runs as fast as he can soon the police come, they handcuff you and put you in the back of a police car. you don't know what's going to happen to you now, but you know it won't be good
August 2021

This guy's veganism is CRAZY!

twitchquotes: ☑ This guy's veganism is CRAZY!” ☑ “My vegetables can't win against fruits like that” ☑ "He needed PRECISELY those two cucumbers to win" ☑ “He bought the only tomato that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect eggplants ☑ “There was nothing I could cook” ☑ “I ate that perfectly”
twitch chat
May 2017
Kripp

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

Having to call a judge “your honor” is so cringey (found on /r/unpopularopinion)

“Your Honor”. I mean gimmie a fuckin’ break, dude. What else do you want me to call you? Your highness? Do you want me to fondle your nuts while I blow you, too? I’ve seriously seen courtrooms where they’ll say “Sir” and the judge will be like “It’s “Your Honor” young man!!” Fuck off. How much of an egotist you gotta be to care about some medieval-ass title? Use “Sir” like everybody else. It’s some LARPING I’d expect kids to do. “Oh Billy you have to call me supreme ruler snorlax the magical wizard!!1!” Shut up. EDIT: I’m literally 22 and have never been in front of a judge, y’all, please relax and slow down with the theory crafting/ story writing. EDIT 2: A lot of people are saying “it’s just a title, like Doctor!”. Judges have a title like “Doctor”, it’s called “Judge” - Doctors don’t expect us to call them “Thy Healer” or some crap like that.
August 2021
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