[Copypasta] Apology letter from the condom factory

twitchquotes: What in the actual rainbows is wrong with your brain? Did you IQ test return with negative results or something? Iā€™m getting closer and closer to believing that your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. Jesus Christ. Love the content keep it up.
twitch chat
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Hey, I noticed you were a female

Hello, I noticed you have a profile picture of a very beautiful (but also intelligent looking!) female, and I am under the presumption that this goddess is you? It is quite astonishing to see a female here in the Pakistan Official discord. I am quite popular around here in this server, so if you require guidance, please throw me a mention. I will assist you at any hour, day or night. And, before you are mistaken, I do not seek your hand in a romantic way; although I am not opposed in the event you are interested in me, as many women often are. I am a man of standard, and I do not bow to just any female that comes my way, unlike my peers... So rest assured that I will not be in the way of your gaming and socializing experience. Consider me a Player 2.. a companion, a partner, and perhaps we can enjoy some video games together some time. I see you play mini games? I am a mini-game aficionado, so I would be happy to assist you in games. Platonically of course, unless you (like many others) change your mind on that. I look forward to our future together (as friends of course.)
May 2021

Simps

Which Rogue card should I pick?

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, I'm drafting a Rogue Arena and I'm 29 cards in. Should I pick Backstab (like you backstabbed Paparrian ) Betrayal (like you betrayed Paparrian ) or Vanish (like you vanished from Paparrian)
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Bloomberg terminal vs toilet trading

Imagine spending 20K on a bloomberg terminal and thousands on hardware just to get smoke checked by some retards on the toilet trading on their phone that are not only on the spectrum but might be the actual spectrum.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Do NOT meet Robert Downey Jr. in real life!

I met him in real life and told him how much of a fan I was. He kept on saying rude things to me such as "Who are you", "How did you get in my house" and "I'm calling the police." Celebrities, PLEASE respect your fans!
June 2021

Dennis

twitchquotes: ļ½—ļ½ˆļ½…ļ½Ž ļ½„ļ½…ļ½Žļ½Žļ½‰ļ½“ ļ½“ļ½ļ½‰ļ½”ļ½…ļ¼Œ ļ½ļ½™ ļ½…ļ½™ļ½… ļ½ļ½•ļ½”ļ½ļ½ļ½ļ½”ļ½‰ļ½ƒļ½ļ½Œļ½Œļ½™ ļ½‡ļ½ ļ½”ļ½ ļ½”ļ½ˆļ½… ļ½ˆļ½…ļ½’ļ½ ļ½ˆļ½…ļ½ļ½Œļ½”ļ½ˆļ¼Ž ļ½‰ ļ½—ļ½ļ½”ļ½ƒļ½ˆ ļ½”ļ½ˆļ½… ļ½ˆļ½…ļ½’ļ½ ļ½ˆļ½…ļ½ļ½Œļ½”ļ½ˆ ļ½ļ½Žļ½„ ļ½†ļ½…ļ½…ļ½Œ ļ½‰ ļ½ˆļ½ļ½–ļ½… ļ½“ļ½…ļ½˜ ļ½—ļ½‰ļ½”ļ½ˆ ļ½”ļ½ˆļ½… ļ¼’ ļ½“ļ½‹ļ½‰ļ½ļ½ļ½…ļ½„ ļ½”ļ½•ļ½’ļ½Žļ¼Ž ļ½ļ½Œļ½Œ ļ½‚ļ½…ļ½ƒļ½ļ½ļ½‰ļ½Žļ½‡ ļ½“ļ½•ļ½„ļ½ļ½‹ļ½•
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
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