[Copypasta] I've never even watched The Simpsons

I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Krippis casualis

twitchquotes: Krippis casualis! o͡╮༼ ಠДಠ ༽╭o͡━☆゚.*・。゚
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Discovering a way to produce eggs much like a chicken does

twitchquotes: Hello, i come to seek help. I am interested in trying to discover a way to produce eggs much like a chicken does. i have tested inserting the egg into myself and hoping it will act like a seed and grow like a tree in my belly but so far it has not been successful. Please help i struggle to sleep at night without an answer.
twitch chat
December 2014
Forsen

KKona boy I was at that darn there

twitchquotes: KKona boy I was at that darn there hootenanny shindig gitten down on some damn there squaredancin, when a fine belle asked me for a dance. Couldn't see nuthin, the damn barn dint have no damn light fixtures. But I knew she was prettier than fresh cooked stew from mama. Boy I tell you, I said yes faster than a one legged gator on a tractor boy I tell you. Once we had a darn tootin time in that darn there doe-see-doe, i took er out 'hind the hay bales. Mmm boi I tooker pants off faster than a hot knife through butter yessir. Lets just say i gave er the ol' Tennessee One Two. We both laid down right there on the spot mmmmboy. Held er nice an tight til mornin light. Opened my eyes and I couldnt believe what I saw! It was my damn sister the whole darn time. I aint opposed to it KKona
twitch chat
October 2018

Riot disables LOLalerter

twitchquotes: Mr Sanatana, This is Riot, we found out that you have released many of these so called "Dank memes" into our chat so we are disabling LOLalerter for you untill you grow up into an Adulterino and stop trollerino
twitch chat
March 2015
imaqtpie

League of Legends

With this dust of a Dorito chip, I use this chant to summon Kripp!

twitchquotes: (つ•̀ᴥ•́)つ*:・゚✧ With this dust of a Dorito™ chip, I use this chant to summon Kripp! (つ•̀ᴥ•́)つ*:・゚✧
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing