[Copypasta] I've never even watched The Simpsons

I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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In Japan, heart surgeon

Number one. Steady hand. One day, yakuza boss need new heart. I do operation. But mistake! Yakuza boss die! Yakuza very mad! I hide fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car and new woman. Darryl save life. My big secret. I kill yakuza boss on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!
April 2021

Classic

KKona boy I was at that darn there

twitchquotes: KKona boy I was at that darn there hootenanny shindig gitten down on some damn there squaredancin, when a fine belle asked me for a dance. Couldn't see nuthin, the damn barn dint have no damn light fixtures. But I knew she was prettier than fresh cooked stew from mama. Boy I tell you, I said yes faster than a one legged gator on a tractor boy I tell you. Once we had a darn tootin time in that darn there doe-see-doe, i took er out 'hind the hay bales. Mmm boi I tooker pants off faster than a hot knife through butter yessir. Lets just say i gave er the ol' Tennessee One Two. We both laid down right there on the spot mmmmboy. Held er nice an tight til mornin light. Opened my eyes and I couldnt believe what I saw! It was my damn sister the whole darn time. I aint opposed to it KKona
twitch chat
October 2018

Hey TSM, thanks for paying for my free entertainment

twitchquotes: ( ยฐ อœส–อกยฐ)โ•ญโˆฉโ•ฎ Hey T S M, thanks for paying for my free entertainment ( ยฐ อœส–อกยฐ)โ•ญโˆฉโ•ฎ
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Lapras

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–“ โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ”€โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–’โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ
ascii art
April 2017

Pokemon

Okayge COCK

โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ ฟโ ฟโขฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ฟโ ›โ ฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ฟโ Ÿโ ‰โ „โฃ€โกคโขคโฃคโฃˆโ โฃ โก”โ ถโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ ›โ ‹โ โ „โ „โ „โฃผโฃฟโ โก€โขนโฃฟโฃทโขนโก‡โ „โ Žโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ฟโ ›โ ‰โ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ นโฃ‡โฃ€โฃกโฃพโฃฟโกฟโ ‰โ ›โ ’โ ’โ ‹โ ‰โขธ โกฟโ ‹โ โ „โ „โข€โฃคโฃคโก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˆโ ™โ ›โ ›โ ‰โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˆ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขนโฃงโกˆโ ฟโฃทโฃ„โฃ€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โข€โฃ โข„โฃพ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˆโ ปโขฟโฃถโฃŒโฃ™โก›โ ›โ ฟโ ถโ ถโ ถโ ถโ ถโ –โฃ’โฃ’โฃšโฃ‹โกฉโขฑโฃพโฃฟ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˆโ ‰โ ›โ ›โ ›โ ปโ ฟโ ฟโ Ÿโ ›โ ›โ ›โ ‰โข‰โฃฅโฃถโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ’โ ถโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˆโ ปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโกฟโ ›โ ›โ ›โขปโฃฟโ ฟโ ›โ ›โ ›โขฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ ›โ ›โ ›โขปโกŸโ ›โฃฟโกฟโ ›โฃปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โกŸโ „โฃผโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ „โฃพโฃฟโฃงโ „โขปโกโ „โฃผโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ „โกŸโข€โฃดโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โก‡โ „โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก„โ „โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ „โขธโก‡โ „โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ „โฃ€โ ˆโขปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃ„โ ˆโ ™โ ›โขปโฃงโก„โ ™โ ›โ ‰โฃ โฃฟโฃทโฃ„โ ˆโ ™โ ›โขนโก‡โ „โฃฟโฃงโ „โ ปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ
ascii art
April 2020

Classic

Pepe

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