Holy shit Kim Kardashian is about to be single. I've waited so long for this moment. This is my chance, my opportunity. God is real. I should chill with the god talk because she's probably over that stuff but im fucking hyped. I am going to shoot my shot. I am not black so my chances are less but I have been doing push ups, eating vitamins and controlling my jacking off.
What happened to this ad? :(
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TIFU: By slapping my wife’s ass
TIFU: By slapping my wife’s ass
Last night my wife and I were getting hot and heavy, and began having sex. During sex, I decided to put in a little spanking.
This is where things got weird.
As I slapped her ass in the heat of the moment, she bursts out with “yes daddy, spank me harder!” (To preface I knew she had some serious daddy issues)This initially was a turn on, but after a few seconds all I could think of was disciplining my daughter and my face went sour. I stopped immediately and felt awkward. She responded with “what’s wrong daddy, did you not punish me enough?”
I walked out of the room and told her I needed a minute. Now I don’t think I can ever have sex again.
TL;DR slapped my wife’s ass, called me daddy, now I can only think about disciplining my daughter and don’t know if I can ever have sex again
I am the PUBG MOBILE elite pro killer
twitchquotes:
They criticized me. They called called me the salt mine. They called me the hs arena cry-baby. But look at me now. I am the PUBG MOBILE elite pro killer. Navy SEALs have nothing on me. Get gud chat cause I'm coming for you.
twitch chat
Kripp
sellout
PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds
Young pistachio becomes grand old cashew
twitchquotes:
Let me tell you a story. I was once a young pistachio like you. But then I saw the light. I saw the kripp and let the kripp into my life. Now I am a grand old cashew with a pepperoni plantation to boot. Don't make the mistake I once did and deny the kripp. Kripp is love. Kripp is life. Praise the Kripp. Amen.
twitch chat
Kripp
Hafu is more hardcore than Kripp
twitchquotes:
Kripp, I'm disappointed in you. Your chat is out of control and you don't even care. Your veiwers are the most pathetic scum on Twitch. Even worse, Hafu is a more hardcore player than you. Are you even trying anymore? Whatever, I'm going to go watch Reynad or Trump, you useless bag of ***.
twitch chat
Kripp
Fortnite default dance in text form
twitchquotes:
pulls both arms outwards in front of my chest and pumps them behind my back, repeats this motion in a smaller range of motion down to my hips two times once more all while sliding my legs in a faux walking motion, claps my hands together in front of me while both my knees knock together, pumps my arms downward, pronating my wrists and abducting my fingers outward while crossing my legs back and forth, repeats this motion again two times while keeping my shoulders low and hunching over, does finger gun with right hand with left hand bent on my hip while looking directly forward and putting my left leg forward then crossing my arms and leaning back a little while bending my knees at an angle
twitch chat