Ma'am, you may want to McSit™ down for this. We are deeply McSorry™ to inform you your husband has McPerished™ in the McLine™ of duty. He bravely led a McCharge™ against the Burger Emperor's Army™, and through his McBravery™ we were able to hold the McLine™ long enough for McReinforcements™ to arrive. Your husband is being awarded the Grimace Medal of McHonor™ for his McService™, and for his McBravery™ we will be sending you a complimentary Happy Meal™ as a token of appreciation. His service to the McMarine™ Corps will never be forgotten.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Kripp, eat chicken
twitchquotes:
Kripp this is Dr. Zeus Stromboloupolous. We need you to immediately star drinking MILK and EAT chicken at least once every week. Otherwise RIP is veganiro pepperoni
twitch chat
Kripp
Minion Joker
───────────▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄
────────▄▀▀═════════════▀▀▄
───────█═══════════════════█
──────█═════════════════════█
─────█══════▄▄███████▄▄══════█
────█═════▄█████████████▄═════█
────█════▄████▀─────▀████▄════█
───███████████──█▀█──███████████
───███████████──▀▀▀──███████████
────█════▀█████▄▄▄▄▄█████▀════█
────█══════▀███████████▀══════█
────█═█▄═══════════════════▄█═█
────█══██▄═══════════════▄██══█
────█═══██▄═════════════▄██═══█
────█════▀███▄═══════▄███▀════█
────█═════▀▀███████████▀▀═════█
────█═════════▀▀▀▀▀▀▀═════════█
───▐▓▓▌═════════════════════▐▓▓▌
───▐▐▓▓▌▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▐▓▓▌▌
───█══▐▓▄▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▄▓▌══█
──█══▌═▐▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▌═▐══█
──█══█═▐▓▓▓▓▓▓▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▓▓▓▓▓▓▌═█══█
──█══█═▐▓▓▓▓▓▓▐██▀██▌▓▓▓▓▓▓▌═█══█
──█══█═▐▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▀▀▀▀▀▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▌═█══█
──█══█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█══█
─▄█══█▐▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▌█══█▄
─█████▐▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▌─█████
─██████▐▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▌─██████
──▀█▀█──▐▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▌───█▀█▀
─────────▐▓▓▓▓▓▓▌▐▓▓▓▓▓▓▌
──────────▐▓▓▓▓▌──▐▓▓▓▓▌
─────────▄████▀────▀████▄
─────────▀▀▀▀────────▀▀▀▀
NEVER SUBBED NEVER DONATED
twitchquotes:
NEVER SUBBED 
NEVER DONATED ADBLOCK ON STOLEN LAPTOP NEIGHBOURS WIFI MOMMAS HOUSE STOLEN SOLAR PANELS STOLEN SUN SOLAR ENERGY STOLEN WATER WHEEL NEIGHBOURS RIVER STOLEN HYDROELECTRIC PLANT CHARGING PHONE WITH WORK ELECTRICITY SHOWER IN BATHROOM SINK STOLEN FOOD FROM CAFETERIA STOLEN HAMSTER STOLEN HAMSTER WHEEL KINETIC ENERGY FREE ENTERTAINMENT
NEVER DONATED ADBLOCK ON STOLEN LAPTOP NEIGHBOURS WIFI MOMMAS HOUSE STOLEN SOLAR PANELS STOLEN SUN SOLAR ENERGY STOLEN WATER WHEEL NEIGHBOURS RIVER STOLEN HYDROELECTRIC PLANT CHARGING PHONE WITH WORK ELECTRICITY SHOWER IN BATHROOM SINK STOLEN FOOD FROM CAFETERIA STOLEN HAMSTER STOLEN HAMSTER WHEEL KINETIC ENERGY FREE ENTERTAINMENT
twitch chat
There's no reason to have a Dad Bod when push ups exist
There's no reason to have a Dad Bod when push ups exist. I'm always finding time to crank out a few p-ups. Ahh yep, I do maybe a thousand p-ups a day and I'm a father of two. Those nerds coloring with crayons? Time to squeeze in a few p-ups. Little dorks eating mac and cheese? It's p-up time. I'm like a leathered marble statue of a really muscular guy, my muscles are so tight and rugged. Hell, I took a p-up break while typing this comment. The ladies at work, these little work ladies, love when I crank out p-ups right there in front of them and come up off the floor red faced and with a sizeable bulge in my slacks. That bulge is unrelated to the p-ups, by the way, I'm just a guy who's always one hard nipple poking through a shirt away from a full meat platter. Hell, I'd cheat on my wife with one of these little work ladies if she wasn't one of the little work ladies I work with. We bone in the bathroom. I get jacked on p-ups and then we bone in the bathroom and there's nothing my boss can do about it because my vascularity is way too intimidating. I tell him he should do some p-ups if he wants to fuck my wife. It's the only way she gets that slizz juiced and loosed. She wants to see multitudinous p-ups and she wants to see those p-ups now! Whoops! Haha, okay, looks like she's watching me type this over my shoulder. Uh oh. See ya later, nerdbags. I'm gonna p-ups myself up to a full plumper and pump that honey ham rump of my little work lady wife.
Hey mods, slow mode doesn't affect me
twitchquotes:
Hey mods, did you really think that slow mode will affect on me. I will let you know that I have multiple accounts in this chat right now. If you don't believe me, I will copy and paste this on my other accounts right now.
twitch chat