[Copypasta] I, a god-level CoD player, could join the military

Ok. Listen up bud. You’re a kid, and you’re getting cocky. You snuck in a few good quick scopes and got a few points ahead of me, but you have no chance. I am a Call of Duty god. I would be killing terrorists in Iraq if it weren’t for the fact that I would punch the drill sergeant in the face if he even looked at me funny. So don’t get cocky, bud. Or just like my kill/death ratio, you’re going down, kid. As soon as I finish the campaign I’m tracking your IP, hunting you down and beating the crap out of you. You’ve been warned.
February 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

nl_kripp this is le reddit army!

twitchquotes: @nl_kripp this is le reddit army! Please cease streaming or be prepared to get downvoted!! If you do not IMMEDIATELY stop streaming I'm going to meme you so hard that you're fedora falls off. I bet you did nazi see that coming. Nailed it, you see what I did there? DO NOT COPY PASTE THIS! Good day sir!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Barry Bee Benson v2 (Bee Movie)

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠠⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠉⠢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡀⣀⣤⣦⣷⣤⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣷⣿⣿⠟⣫⠕⠒⢚⠹⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢐⣿⠟⠓⠂⠀⠀⠠⢨⣤⠉⠂⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⡤⢶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡏⡄⢢⣖⠠⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⠀⠘⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⡾⠗⢻⡷⠈⠻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢏⠀⠈⠋⠀⠀⠄⢀⠀⠉⠀⠀⢱⠀⠀⠐⠖⣖⠒⠋⠉⠁⣀⣀⣤⣾⠿⠋⠁⠀⠀⢸⣧⠀⠀⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢦⡀⠐⠒⠒⠈⠀⠀⢀⣠⢆⡞⠀⠀⠀⣼⣏⠃⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⡀⠀⠀⣾⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⢤⣶⡶⣿⣿⣿⢟⡥⡊⠀⠀⠀⣼⣟⠂⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣆⠀⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠧⠀⠙⠻⣿⣈⠀⠀⢀⣾⢟⠎⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⢀⣿⣿⡆⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⠀⠁⠜⠻⣾⣴⣿⣯⡂⠀⢀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⣼⣿⣿⢡⣻⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠀⠀⠈⠀⠘⠈⠛⠷⣷⣿⣷⣶⣌⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⣼⣿⣿⠃⢸⠃⠻⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡌⡤⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢻⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣶⣿⣿⣯⣀⣟⣠⣴⣷⣾⣿⡿⠛⠛⠻⣟⣷⠒⠄ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⣰⣿⣿⡿⠃⣸⠟⠉⠁⠀⠀⠟⠛⠛⠚⠫⠀⠠⠙⠠⠇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠤⠾⠿⠿⠋⠐⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
June 2021

Kripp complains

twitchquotes: The opponent mulligans his cards. "Oh my god dude, are you kidding me?" says Kripp. The opponent plays a 2 drop. "Seriously dude? This is crazy." The opponent draws a card at the start of their turn. "No fckin way dude, I can't beat that." The opponent hero powers. "This is some crazy RNG bullshit" says Kripp.
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

salty

Things are looking up for me (and down for you)

twitchquotes: I don’t need you. There are a whole lot of other streamers that deserve my time and support. As they say there are plenty of other fish in the sea. Fish without husbands too... you liar skank. I will no longer be dedicating 1/3 of my day to moderating your chat. Let the wildebeests roam... and if you need me, I’ll be in STPeach’s chat from now on. You may not know this but I actually do watch her streams after yours are over. And I’ve been a 6 month subscriber as well... I donated her $30 the other day and said her outfit looked cute - she said I’m a sweetheart. Things are looking up for me (and down for you). This is where I bid farewell to you, have fun being a liar bitchface.
twitch chat
May 2020

Simps

Dear Kripp, this is you from the future!

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, this is you from the future!!! The fate of Earth depends on YOU! When you ignored chat and didn't place the kitty on your lap and pet it, it lead to a global economic crash and all out nuclear war!! For the love of humanity put the damn kitty in your lap now and pet it like our lives depend on it!!!!! Sincerely , Future Kripp
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing