[Copypasta] I, a god-level CoD player, could join the military

Ok. Listen up bud. You’re a kid, and you’re getting cocky. You snuck in a few good quick scopes and got a few points ahead of me, but you have no chance. I am a Call of Duty god. I would be killing terrorists in Iraq if it weren’t for the fact that I would punch the drill sergeant in the face if he even looked at me funny. So don’t get cocky, bud. Or just like my kill/death ratio, you’re going down, kid. As soon as I finish the campaign I’m tracking your IP, hunting you down and beating the crap out of you. You’ve been warned.
February 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Fortnite default dance 9

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣶ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⣶⣿⣿⠶ ⣶⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣤ ⠀⠉⠶⣶⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣤⣀ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠿⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⠀⠶⠿⠿ ⠀⠀⠛⠛⠿⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣉⠿⣿⠶ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠒ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠛⣭⣭⠉ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣭⣤⣿⠛ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣭ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠉⠛⠿⣶⣤ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣿⠀⠀⣶⣶⠿⠿⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠛ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣭⣶
November 2018

Fortnite Default Dance

Fortnite

KAPOW

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠄⢀⣤⣾⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⠀⢠⣾⠏⢀⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⢠⣶⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⢀⣿⠏⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠚⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣾⠋⠀⠀⣿⣿⠁⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣆⣀⣸⣿⣯⣴⢿⣿⣿⠧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣾⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⡇⠹⡿⢣⣿⡿⠋⠀⠘⠛⠁⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⠏⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠸⠋⠁⠀⠀⠈⠉⠃⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠹⣿⣿⡇⢀⣿⠀⣾⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⢀⣤⣶⣾⣷⣆⠀⣿⣿⣇⣾⣿⣰⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣾⣿⠟⠉⣸⡿⢣⣾⣿⠟⠻⣿⣿⡄⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⣿⣠⡴⠟⢡⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⣿⠁⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⢸⣿⣇⠀⢀⣴⡿⠃⠀⠟⠋⠁⠀⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
October 2020

Is buttcheeks one word

twitchquotes: Hey [streamer name], it's Ashley Jones from secondary school. I remember you were the best English student back in the day so I figured I would hop in the stream to ask you a question for the GMAT. Is buttcheeks one word, or should I spread them?
twitch chat
May 2021

Kripparian here with VEGAN FACTS

twitchquotes: Hi guys Kripp here with VEGAN FACTS! Did you know that milk is literally !Worse Than Hitler! and also killed many people during the Twitch Chat-ocaust in the 1940's? If you drink milk your bones will be as frail as Reynad's Rag RNG and you'll basically be Leifman's brother. Well, that's all for today's vegan facts! Bye guys! BRO FIST!!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Don't feel too bad after Team Liquid destroys G2

twitchquotes: Hey EU fans, don't feel too bad after Team Liquid absolutely destroys G2 tonight. Being the 2nd best region in the world (after North America of course) is still something to be very proud of! 🙂
twitch chat
May 2019
Riot Games

Classic

League of Legends

EU vs NA

Text-to-Speech Playing