Ok. Listen up bud. You’re a kid, and you’re getting cocky. You snuck in a few good quick scopes and got a few points ahead of me, but you have no chance. I am a Call of Duty god. I would be killing terrorists in Iraq if it weren’t for the fact that I would punch the drill sergeant in the face if he even looked at me funny. So don’t get cocky, bud. Or just like my kill/death ratio, you’re going down, kid. As soon as I finish the campaign I’m tracking your IP, hunting you down and beating the crap out of you. You’ve been warned.
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More Copypastas
Kaceytron's Porn Producer
twitchquotes:
ＫＡＣＥＹＴＲＯＮ, ＨＥＲＥ＇Ｓ ＹＯＵＲ ＰＯＲＮ ＰＲＯＤＵＣＥＲ ＣＡＬＬＩＮＧ ＹＯＵ ＯＵＴ！ Ｉ ＣＯＵＬＤＮ＇Ｔ ＲＥＡＣＨ ＹＯＵ ＯＮ ＰＯＲＮＨＵＢ ＯＲ ＢＲＡＺＺＥＲＳ, ＳＯ Ｉ＇Ｍ ＣＡＬＬＩＮＧ ＹＯＵ ＯＵＴ ＨＥＲＥ ＯＮ ＴＨＥ ＴＷＩＴＣＨ ＣＨＡＴ, ＨＯＰＥ ＹＯＵ ＤＯＮ＇Ｔ ＭＩＮＤ！ ＷＥ ＪＵＳＴ ＳＣＨＥＤＵＬＥＤ Ａ ＮＥＷ ＭＯＶＩＥ ＣＡＬＬＥＤ "ＫＩＮＧ ＤＯＮＧＥＲ" ＹＯＵ＇ＬＬ ＢＥ ＴＨＥ ＭＡＩＮ ＳＴＡＲ ＡＬＯＮＧ ＷＩＴＨ ＢＥＮ Ｄ＇ＯＶＥＲ ＡＮＤ ＫＩＮＫＹ ＫＯＮＧ！ ＣＯＭＥ ＯＶＥＲ ＴＯＭＯＲＲＯＷ ＡＴ １２ＰＭ, ＷＥ ＳＴＡＲＴ ＰＲＯＤＵＣＴＩＯＮ ＡＴ ＴＨＡＴ ＨＯＵＲ. ＩＦ ＹＯＵ ＤＯ ＷＥＬＬ, ＹＯＵ＇ＬＬ ＨＡＶＥ ＡＮ ＥＸＴＲＡ. ＜３ ＸＯＸＯ
twitch chat
Kaceytron
Ben Brode increased Kripp's odds for going second
twitchquotes:
Hi Kripp, Ben Brode here. After checking your account, we noticed that your odds for going second were accidentally set to "60" % instead of "50"%. We apologize for the inconvenience, as this change was mean to be applied to a "reynad" account. The issue is on our radar, and we will patch it when we can. Thank you and have a good day!
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
Ninja's wife and xqc's twitter feud
twitchquotes:
Of course 🤗 I was going to answer👮♂️ sweetie , 🥰 I was eating breakfast🧇, fueling up for a productive day 💅 Not very relatable 🤨 I know! 😼 You should teach me a thing 😗 or 2✌ about fundraisers 🗣💵 i'm sure you know a thing or two ✌ about raising funds. 🤣🤪 I mean, these gucci 🐍 bags don't pay for themselves. 🙌 🦍
twitch chat
xQcOW
SadKek
⣯⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⡿⠉⠈⠛⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠛⠋⠛⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠇⠀⢀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣇⠀⡀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠙⠛⠻⣽⠻⢦⣄⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣌⡉⠉⢿⣿
⣶⠀⠐⠆⠀⠀⡾⢦⣬⠓⢼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⡀⠄⠀⢀⠠⡤⠁⢀⣀⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣷⡀⠀⠈⣶⣶⣾⣿⡀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⡐⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⠋⢁⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣩⣿⡍⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⠚⠻⢿⡿⠿⠛⠻⢿⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠀⠀ ⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠈⢿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠈⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠸⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠒⠺⠷⠶⠤⠤⢤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⢹⣇⠀⠀⣠⣤⣴⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⣉⣙⣠⣤⣄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⢿⡆⠰⣿⣿⣿⣯⣭⣉⣙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call
So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. I’m a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but I’m not sure what to say in interviews now if I’m asked why I left this job. Any advice?