[Copypasta] Imagine being Bill Gates right now.

Imagine being Bill Gates right now. You spend 30 years of your life and $50 billion of your own dollars supporting humanitarian causes. You directly save hundreds of thousands of lives in South East Asia by providing anti malaria netting to half of a continent, you drop infant mortality rates throughout the entire developing world by funding vaccine programs including vaccinating 40,000,000 children for polio, and, amongst a plethora of philanthropic endeavors, you fund free educational platforms like Khan Academy so people can have free access to high quality education. Then after donating half of your wealth to charity and pledging 90% of the remainder to charity in your will.. Arguably doing more to better life on earth for humanity than any other human being to ever live. You then hop on the internet only to find a million scientifically illiterate fucking imbeciles that are using the very computers you pretty much invented in the first place to call you a child murdering arch villian antichrist because they watched a YouTube video made by some other yokel with the comprehension of a fucking potato.
February 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

krippO

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–“โ–‘ โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–“โ–“ โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–“โ–‘โ–“โ–“ โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“ โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–“โ–‘ โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–‘ โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
August 2016
Kripp

Imagine Fortnite Jonesy in Smash

Imagine this: You're watching the new Nintendo Direct. As it begins you hope to see the new smash reveal, and are hoping you get the character you so desperately wanted, whether it's Crash Bandicoot or Sora. The trailer begins with the classic smash opening. As you watch the trailer, you begin to feel hope that your dream may have come true. But then, at the part where the character is revealed, you hear a bus horn, and wonder "Is it coming from outside?" But no. It's from the trailer. You watch a manly figure drop out of the sky, landing gracefully in front of the characters he is about to defeat. It gazes upon his sharp-bladed pickaxe, his luxurious blond hair, and his shining silver dog tags. As the sun fades away, you finally see who it really was: It was Jonesy from Fortnite. It's a long shot, I know. But imagine.
September 2021

Fortnite

Super Smash Bros

I think YouTube rewind 2018 was a masterpiece!

twitchquotes: I think YouTube rewind 2018 was a masterpiece! It perfectly encapsulates the spirit of 2018 and the super funny memes we had this year such as fortnite dances, baby shark, dame tu cosita, k pop, and more! I especially like the part with everyone jumping out of the bus in the sky! That was so cool it looked so real. Thank you YouTube for making my year and reminding me of the awesome funny memes!!!
twitch chat
December 2018

you will never be on my intellectual level

twitchquotes: listen until you guys have read fichte, kant, schelling, hegel, goethe, novalis and hamann in the original german, you will never be on my intellectual level, you are plebs who are addicted to reddit and think rick and morty is a deep show, your children will be dysgenic losers and mine will be serious winners and well-educated, they'll probably smack the glasses off your children for fun and then go read homer in the original greek.
twitch chat
August 2020

7 goals and only 2 nets

twitchquotes: HOW CAN GERMANY SCORE 7 GOALS WHEN THERE ARE ONLY 2 NETS IN THE FIELD?
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing