[Copypasta] Kermit the frog caused 9/11

Kermit the frog caused 9/11. In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alternate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene, however they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
February 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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Natalie Portman is the reason I work out

Natalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink. "Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Natalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave. Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette. "Got a spare?" she asks. "What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles. "Conversation with me, duh." I laugh. "What's so funny?" she protests. "Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?" "You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter. "What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask. "Teaching, I think." "And if I was your student, what would I be learning?" "Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?" "Bermuda," I say. "Oh wow. That's lovely." "It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking." "What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires. "I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."
January 2021

Classic

Cute gamer girl

twitchquotes: Thijs I am a 22 year old gamer girl in search of a gamer man. I have been watching your stream for years and really like your deck. If you want to give a cute gamer girl like me a chance whisper me. ;) HAHA Just kidding, it's still Tanner you fucking gullible idiot lmfao. Anyway, the gym awaits, see ya man good talk.
twitch chat
June 2019
Thijs

Hearthstone

Tanner from High School

Flex your Dongers for Harambe

twitchquotes: แ•ฆเผผเผŽเบถ_เผŽเบถเผฝแ•— Flex your Dongers for Harambe! แ•ฆเผผเผŽเบถ_เผŽเบถเผฝแ•—แ•ฆเผผเผŽเบถ_เผŽเบถเผฝแ•— Flex your Dongers for Harambe! แ•ฆเผผเผŽเบถ_เผŽเบถเผฝแ•—
twitch chat
August 2016

Harambe

MOM I NEED V-BUCKS

twitchquotes: โ—๏ธโœ‹ OK MOM โœ‹โ—๏ธWE NEED TO TALK ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ˜ค I NEED V-BUCKS ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ’ต I'VE MADE STRAIGHT A'S ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿคจ I'VE CLEANED MY ROOM ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿคฌ I'VE TAKEN OUT THE TRASH ๐Ÿ—‘๏ธ๐Ÿ”ซ I CUT THE CATS ASSHOLE HAIR ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ‘ NOW I NEED YOU ๐Ÿง๐Ÿ‘‰ TO BUY ME V-BUCKS ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ”ฅ I'VE GOTTA SHOW ๐Ÿคฏ๐Ÿคฌ MY CLOUT ON FORTNITE ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ’ฏ NOW I'LL BE IN BED ๐Ÿ˜ด๐Ÿ’ค BY NINE BECAUSE IT'S A SCHOOL NIGHT ๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ“š๐Ÿšธ
twitch chat
November 2018

Fortnite

Billy the Puppet (from Saw)

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–„โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ”€โ–„โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ–„โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–Œโ–Œโ–Œโ–Œโ–’โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–’โ–’โ–โ–โ–โ– โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–’โ–’โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–’โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–’โ–’โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–’โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€
September 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing