[Copypasta] I regret to inform you, there is no cock left

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ“œ โœ๏ธ ๐ผ ๐“‡๐‘’๐‘”๐“‡๐‘’๐“‰ ๐“‰๐‘œ ๐’พ๐“ƒ๐’ป๐‘œ๐“‡๐“‚ ๐“Ž๐‘œ๐“Š, ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“‡๐‘’ ๐’พ๐“ˆ ๐“ƒ๐‘œ ๐’ธ๐‘œ๐’ธ๐“€ ๐“๐‘’๐’ป๐“‰.
twitch chat
February 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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PETA must be alerted

twitchquotes: Last night at Greece's most prominent Red Light District, Kripp was seen pimping out Catarrian for very cheap. PETA must be alerted of this horrid cat prostitution ring hidden under this "Twitch streaming"
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AITA for slapping a stand-up comedian who dissed my wife?

AITA for slapping a stand-up comedian who dissed my wife? Okay, little background. My (53M) wife (50F) has a medical condition called Alopeca Areata, which basically means she has excessive hair loss, and is currently bald. My relationship with my wife wasn't stable over the years, and I've caught her cheating on me multiple times, but we've pulled through. Anyway, we went to an awards show and usually there is a comedian who hosts the show and makes jokes at everybody (in a good way). The comedian was a guy we know (and he knew us), and we had a really good time. At one point, he mentioned me and my wife and I was happy he acknowledged us. But then, he took a jab at my wife about her condition, which I thought was way out of line, but I laughed out of embarrassment. My wife, on the other hand, was not laughing at all and rolled her eyes. At that moment I knew I had to stand up for her. I got up on stage, smacked the sh*t out of the guy, and went back to my seat. The comedian was shocked and really wasn't expecting my reaction. He wanted to keep talking about my wife but I shouted at him to stop. Usually I don't curse, but I was really pissed about the whole situation. My friends could see I was upset and during the break they came to comfort me, but other people think I'm the asshole. What do you think?
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Being a hentai actress must be so weird

Being a hentai actress must be so weird. Imagine this: youโ€™re in a soundproof room pleasurably screaming into an 800,000ยฅ microphone about how much you love old man dick at 10:47 AM on a Tuesday in October while your 45-year-old boss oversees you through a glass window from the other room. You eventually look up after 2 hours of practicing your unnaturally high-pitched moans and see him give you a big thumbs up as you pretend to have an orgasm.
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