[Copypasta] I regret to inform you, there is no cock left

twitchquotes: πŸ“œ ✍️ 𝐼 𝓇𝑒𝑔𝓇𝑒𝓉 π“‰π‘œ π’Ύπ“ƒπ’»π‘œπ“‡π“‚ π“Žπ‘œπ“Š, 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇𝑒 π’Ύπ“ˆ π“ƒπ‘œ π’Έπ‘œπ’Έπ“€ 𝓁𝑒𝒻𝓉.
twitch chat
February 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

FitnessGram Pacer Test

The FitnessGramβ„’ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.
September 2016

Classic

So as joke, I fucked my friend in a Joseph Stalin cosplay

So as a joke, I went to my friend's house wearing Joseph Stalin's mustache and clothes. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as the Soviet flag and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made made feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my clothes. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said "Yes,comrade." He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "What's the matter,comrade?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted "Not a step back!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came. His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me "Why did we do that? Now I'm not fucking straight." But he still looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'ms till Joseph Stalin."
September 2021

NSFW

LilZ

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–“β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–Œβ–“β–€β–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–Œβ–“β–„β–„β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–€β–„β–‘ β–„β–€β–“β–“β–ˆβ–Œβ–“β–€β–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–€β–’β–„β–Œβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–„β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β–€β–„β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–„β–Œβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–€β–„β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014

Japan's most influential engineers

twitchquotes: Today, we've sadly lost one of Japan's most influential engineers. His name was "Yaoi Futanari" and he designed some of the most important parts of the modern CD Player. He has sadly passed away at the age of 96. Show some love and give him a search on Google.
twitch chat
June 2020

The feel when your favorite streamer is a feeder

twitchquotes: FeelsBadMan THAT FEEL FeelsBadMan WHEN FeelsBadMan YOUR FeelsBadMan FAVORITE FeelsBadMan STREAMER FeelsBadMan IS A FEEDER FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
March 2016
imaqtpie

League of Legends

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