[Copypasta] Red futures :(

Bought a bunch of calls thinking I was going to be able to afford an escort to shit on my chest, now it's these red futures that are shitting on my chest.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More WallStreetBets Copypastas

We should buy Reddit

We should buy Reddit. Not the stock. The actual company. If we all get together and own 51% then we will own this entire website. We could make the rules, profit from the advertising, and finally get paid for the memes we make. I've even come up with a list of things we could do as new owners: Reddit mods can apply for paid-internships at Reddit. This is much closer to having a real job than what they currently do and would benefit the organization. Your flair is your official title at the company. IE: instead of "CFO" you'll be "PotatoFart" NSFW posts will receive special protections--and if you happen to work in our new skyscraper then NSFW posts are automatically considered SFW. Everyone gets a turn in the corporate jet. Elon becomes a mod. He can also apply to become a paid intern. We have a monthly party on our company yacht: The S.S. VisualMod. Our corporate cafeteria is a dining hall with fast food restaurants along the side--but they're all Wendy's. I think this is a great idea. Keep it high and tight. πŸ‘–πŸš€πŸ‘–πŸš€πŸ‘–πŸš€
December 2021

WallStreetBets

Reddit

Drunk at Applebees

I don’t care if there’s a microchip in the vaccine. I’d let them put a whole MacBook Pro inside of me if it meant I could get drunk at Applebees again
December 2020

WallStreetBets

GameStop vs Amazon

i’m not sure how up to date you are on the whole GameStop situation but Amazon is heading for bankruptcy and GameStop is now their biggest competitor. market cap isn’t there yet, but the company plan is on track. also Jeff Bezos is the target of every major corporation now. Amazon CANT survive the next few years with their increasing bad reputation from littering and burning unused inventory to labor rights with their workers being violated. Amazon sounds great, until you look underneath the hood and see all the parts are grinding and screaming. GameStop is targeting Amazon to be the epicenter of e-commerce/gaming. this GameStop earnings has been MASSIVELY anticipated and i believe Amazon will continue to develop a negative correlation to GameStop. so what do they have to do with each other? competitors and GameStops about to make the move with a bite to the jugular.
September 2021

WallStreetBets

where were u wen Melon Captol die (GameStop short squeeze)

apolgy for bad english where were u wen Melon Captol die i was at Gamestock buying Ps5 when phone ring "Melon is kil" β€œyes”
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Stimulus talks going well in 2946

The year is 2946, Robot Mitch McConnel and Cyborg Nancy Pelosi report stimulus talks going well. The Dow rewards them and hits 6.02 x 1023.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

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