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[Copypasta]Red futures :(
Bought a bunch of calls thinking I was going to be able to afford an escort to shit on my chest, now it's these red futures that are shitting on my chest.
Bought a bunch of calls thinking I was going to be able to afford an escort to shit on my chest, now it's these red futures that are shitting on my chest.
(βΜΏΔΉΜ―ββ¬β΄β¬β΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More WallStreetBets Copypastas
MSFT Infinite Money Glitch πππ
Disclaimer: I am not a financial or investment advisor.
Before this subreddit was ruined by ten million people, solid DD used to get done. Do you ever find yourself reminiscing about the good βol WSB days?
Well, your prayers have been answered. Degenerates gather around, as I am bringing you a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to make some serious $MSFT tendies π
Today, Bill Gates announced that after twenty-seven years of marriage, he will be divorcing. Do you know what this means? Bill is single and ready to mingle.
Step 1: Use Wifeβs Tinder Account
Step 2: Match with Bill Gates
Step 3: Wife goes on date with Bill, they fall in love, he proposes, no pre-nup
Step 4: Wife marries Bill and becomes $MSFT royalty
Step 5: Continue to date wife
Step 6: Cash out πππ
For those too retarded to read:
https://preview.redd.it/tts3psz5q0x61.jpg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5f68092ae47d414627c6dee8a0c4afd6808bcc57
Congratulations. You are now your own wifeβs boyfriend.
Disclaimer: I am not a financial or investment advisor.
Before this subreddit was ruined by ten million people, solid DD used to get done. Do you ever find yourself reminiscing about the good βol WSB days?
Well, your prayers have been answered. Degenerates gather around, as I am bringing you a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to make some serious $MSFT tendies π
Today, Bill Gates announced that after twenty-seven years of marriage, he will be divorcing. Do you know what this means? Bill is single and ready to mingle.
Step 1: Use Wifeβs Tinder Account
Step 2: Match with Bill Gates
Step 3: Wife goes on date with Bill, they fall in love, he proposes, no pre-nup
Step 4: Wife marries Bill and becomes $MSFT royalty
Step 5: Continue to date wife
Step 6: Cash out πππ
For those too retarded to read:
https://preview.redd.it/tts3psz5q0x61.jpg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5f68092ae47d414627c6dee8a0c4afd6808bcc57
Congratulations. You are now your own wifeβs boyfriend.
Wallstreetbet's Christmas break
Gonna be checking the market every chance I get while pretending to think my brother-in-law's Cards Against Humanity answers are funny.
Gonna be checking the market every chance I get while pretending to think my brother-in-law's Cards Against Humanity answers are funny.
Genetics is the future
I keep putting more money into ARKG and making more money and I'm starting to actually fall in love with the genetics revolution. I hope one day they invent some sort of super sperm cocktail so I can shoot thicc rope with giant big brain sperm like tadpoles that come out and shoot 16 feet at 90mph. Then I can train my fatheaded genius kids how to buy calls. It could also offer a self-defense solution in a pinch as you rapid fire tadpoles at any incoming attackers.
Genetics is the future.
I keep putting more money into ARKG and making more money and I'm starting to actually fall in love with the genetics revolution. I hope one day they invent some sort of super sperm cocktail so I can shoot thicc rope with giant big brain sperm like tadpoles that come out and shoot 16 feet at 90mph. Then I can train my fatheaded genius kids how to buy calls. It could also offer a self-defense solution in a pinch as you rapid fire tadpoles at any incoming attackers.
Genetics is the future.
Is that insider trading?
If you're a passenger on a newly recertified 737MAX and it starts to nosedive into the sea so you buy shitloads of BA puts over WiFi before impact, is that insider trading?
If you're a passenger on a newly recertified 737MAX and it starts to nosedive into the sea so you buy shitloads of BA puts over WiFi before impact, is that insider trading?