[Copypasta] Boxing gloves

twitchquotes: boxing gloves Okayge ⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣤⣤⣤⡄⢤⣤⣤⣤⡘⠻⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⣀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⢻⣿⣿⣿⡎⠝ ⣿⡏⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡎⣿⣿⣿⣿⠐ ⣿⡏⣲⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢇⣿⣿⣿⡟⣼ ⣿⡠⠜⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠃⠾⠿⢟⡋⢶⣿ ⣿⣧⣄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⢰⣾⣿⣿⡿⢣⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠂⣷⣶⣬⣭⣭⣭⣭⣵⢰⣴⣤⣤⣶⡾⢐⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⡘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃⣼⣿⣿
twitch chat
March 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Vandelar from the castle jousting team

twitchquotes: Hail Kripp, 'tis I, Vandelar from the castle jousting team. How does life treat you today? I notice you continue to fool around with children's playing cards, some things never change! Art thou still playing the wizard of warcraft children's game? I never had time for such pursuits, for I found myself occupied with defending my honor, and laying with beautiful wenches. Alas, it was nice to see thou again, write me and we shall visit the tavern Kreygasm
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Kripp please lick your knee

twitchquotes: Please for the love of god Kripp just lick your goddam knee. I've been sitting here for 10 hours straight watching that boney *** knee of yours by your big lushous mouth. Please just fulfill this one wish I have and lick that sexy *** knee of yours so I can blow my creamy load all over myself and slowly fall into a deep sleep.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

I used to work at an abortion clinic

I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed: • ⁠A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight • ⁠A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor • ⁠They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name) • ⁠One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns • ⁠The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man • ⁠The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life" • ⁠The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos • ⁠The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy) • ⁠During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free
August 2021

NSFW

Survival Arena Developer messages Kripp

twitchquotes: (Survival Arena™ Developer): Hey Kripp! Just popping on to make sure you started streaming our game on time. Remember to wear your Survival Arena shirt and don't forget our little 'arrangement' later tonight at the motel.
twitch chat
May 2017

sellout

Ukrainian President asks Kripp for help

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ, ᴋʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀʀɪɴᴏ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴜᴋʀᴀɴɪᴀɴ ᴘʀᴇsɪᴅᴇɴᴛ ᴏʟᴇᴋsᴀɴᴅʀ ᴛᴜʀᴄʜʏɴᴏᴠɪɴᴏ. ᴏᴜʀ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴀʀᴇ ʙᴇɪɴɢ ᴏᴘᴘʀᴇssᴇᴅ ʙʏ ʀᴜssɪᴀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴏᴜʀ ᴄɪᴛɪᴢᴇɴs ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴏʀᴀɴɢᴇ ᴊᴜɪᴄᴇ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ sᴇɴᴅ ᴏᴊ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ɴᴏ ᴀʟ ᴘᴀᴄɪɴᴏ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
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