[Copypasta] Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
March 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

MagicAmy copypasta

twitchquotes: Hey Reddit, I'm drafting a Rogue Arena deck and I'm 29 cards in. Should I pick Conceal (like how MagicAmy concealed her identity), Sap (like all of us were), or Vanish (like what MagicAmy is about to do)?
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Among Us mini crewmate sitting

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣶⣿⣿⣷⣶⣄⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣾⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⡟⠁⣰⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⠏⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣼⣿⣿⡏⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣸⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠁⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢰⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠛⠉⢉⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣿⣇⠀⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠉⠉⠻⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠹⣿⣿⣇⣀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠉⠛⠋⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
November 2020

Among Us / Amogus

PUCK THE FLEBS

twitchquotes: PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS
twitch chat
March 2016
Forsen

plebs vs subs

Will this pay for singing in mumble

twitchquotes: [̲$̲(̲ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲)̲$̲] Leifman will this pay for singing in mumble? [̲$̲(̲ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲)̲$̲]
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

A Jerma clone showed up at my school as a substitute once

A Jerma clone showed up at my school as a substitute once. He comes is and is posturing like he’s really tall and large but the guy couldn’t be more than 5’4”. The class starts and he is just sitting there in quietly staring forward in the front of the class with an awfully distorted picture of his face that said “The required information is in the lab directions” but he never handed us anything. This goes on for a minute until one of the talkative kids just asks if he is okay he hadn’t even taken a breath yet and veins were popping out of his neck and forehead. The moment the kid made a noise he stated wildly shaking his head around while making high pitched laser(?) sounds. Worst period of geology I’ve ever had. The rest was just him passing out the lab sheet but he would just hold it toward them motionless until they reached for it and he would snatch it away and laugh at them right in their face. Couldn’t find a more fucked guy if I tried. I'll edit in the image if anyone got a pic of it.
March 2022
Jerma985
Text-to-Speech Playing