[Copypasta] Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
March 2021
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Ahegao

โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃ€โฃ โฃคโฃถโฃถโฃถโฃคโฃ„โฃ€โฃ€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃ€โฃคโฃคโฃถโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃŸโขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃถโฃคโก€โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โข€โฃผโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃœโ ฟโ ฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃงโข“ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โก โข›โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกŸโฃฟโฃฟโฃฝโฃ‹โ ปโขปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกปโฃงโก โฃญโฃญโฃฟโกง โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โข โฃฟโกŸโฃฟโขปโ ƒโฃปโฃจโฃปโ ฟโก€โฃโกฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃœโฃœโขฟโฃโกฟโกปโข” โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโกŸโฃทโขฟโขˆโฃšโฃ“โกกโฃปโฃฟโฃถโฃฌโฃ›โฃ“โฃ‰โกปโขฟโฃŽโ ขโ ปโฃดโกพโ ซ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโ ƒโขนโกผโขธโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฆโฃนโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ฟโ ฟโ ฟโ ทโฃŽโกผโ †โฃฟโ ตโฃซ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˆโ „โ ธโกŸโกœโฃฉโก„โ „โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃถโข€โข€โฃฟโฃทโฃฟโฃฟโกโก‡โก„โฃฟ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ โขถโขปโฃงโฃ–โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกโฃฟโฃ‡โกŸโฃ‡โฃทโฃฟ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโฃ†โฃคโฃฝโฃฟโกฟโ ฟโ ฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฆโฃดโก‡โฃฟโขจโฃพโฃฟโขนโขธ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโฃฟโ Šโก›โขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโฃซโขฑโขบโก‡โกโฃฟโฃฟโฃธโกผ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโกฟโ „โฃฟโฃทโฃพโกโฃญโฃถโฃฟโฃฟโกŒโฃผโฃนโขฑโ นโฃฟโฃ‡โฃง โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃผโ โฃคโฃญโฃญโกŒโขโฃผโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโขนโก‡โฃญโฃคโฃถโฃคโกโกผ โ „โฃ€โ คโก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โกโฃˆโกปโกฟโ ƒโข€โฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโกผโ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโขทโขธ โขฐโฃทโกงโกขโ „โ „โ „โ „โ  โข โก›โ ฟโ „โ  โ ฌโ ฟโฃฟโ ญโ ญโขฑโฃ‡โฃ€โฃญโก…โ ถโฃพโฃทโฃถ โ ˆโขฟโฃฟโฃงโ „โ „โ „โ „โข€โก›โ ฟโ „โ „โ „โ „โข โ ƒโ „โ „โกœโ „โ „โฃคโข€โฃถโฃฎโกโฃด โ „โ ˆโฃฟโฃฟโก€โ „โ „โ „โขฉโฃโ ƒโ „โ „โข€โก„โกŽโ „โ „โ „โ ‡โ „โ „โ …โฃดโฃถโฃถโ „โฃถ
January 2021

Weebs

Another extremely unjust loss

twitchquotes: Once again, Kripp, you suffer another extremely unjust loss. I have no idea why you keep losing game after game, even though you possess superb drafting and world-class card game decision making skills. There's clearly something not right and I'm betting that someone at Blizzard may be a little jealous of you.
twitch chat
September 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Domo Kun

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ–„โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„ โ–Œโ–’โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ– โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ– โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€ โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ–โ–’โ–’โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–„โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€
September 2021

Nice hack QVC!

twitchquotes: Nice hack QVC! We all know you are hacking there is no way you would be able to guess all this! Thanks for everything im unfollowing. I hope you mommy never bakes you cookies again. 5up 4 life! HAHA ZOOMERS MALDING!
twitch chat
November 2020
xQcOW

Among Us / Amogus

You have just become intrigued as to what this spam is

twitchquotes: You have just become intrigued as to what this spam is, you go to the chat and scroll to hold it on the screen and indulge in its delights, as you continue to read you realize it does not contain anything funny or worth reading, and yet you highlight, copy it, paste it and send it.
twitch chat
November 2015
Text-to-Speech Playing