[Copypasta] Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
March 2021
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Twitch Chat is the most elusive substance known to man

twitchquotes: 420/69 scientists agree that Twitch Chat is the most elusive substance known to man. The All-Knowing Twitch Chat flows through the very fabric of space and time. Twitch Chat is very unpredictable. What will Twitch Chat copy/pasta next? Nobody knows. Maybe the elusive Twitch Chat will copy/pasta this very message. Just remember, Twitch Chat knows all, and Twitch Chat is always right.
twitch chat
May 2017

Silence Liberal

β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ”€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β”€β–„β–ˆβ–„β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β–„β–„β”€β–ˆβ–„β”€β–€β–ˆβ–„β”€β–„β–ˆβ”€β–„β–„β–„β”€β–ˆβ–„β”€β–„β–„β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β–„β–ˆβ–„β”€β–„β”€β–€β–ˆβ–„β”€β–„β–„β”€β–ˆβ–„β”€β–„β–„β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–„β–€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–„β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–„β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆ β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€
February 2021

hey Tyler, its me Brad

twitchquotes: hey Tyler, its me Brad, remember me . Ha, remember that time when you tried to run trough the A gap but i tackled you so hard you started crying. yes good times man.
twitch chat
February 2019
Tyler1

Tanner from High School

Sad Crewmate

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January 2021

Among Us / Amogus

War Thunder is like playing chess

It's not that the game is addicting, it's just that there are no decent alternatives. War Thunder is basically the intellectual version of the FPS games that all the stupid children and mongoloid brains play. Instead of just being based purely on twitch "skills" which require as much intellectual ability as closing popup spam windows, in War Thunder you have to use at least some tactics and strategy. FPS games are like playing Pong on high speed. War Thunder is like playing chess. The art of gaming is simply dead for big brains. 20 years ago there were tons of games that required brainpower because PC gaming back then was by nerds and for nerds, but then the corporate suits took over and were like "broaden the appeal to we can make more sales" so everything got dumbed down to the lowest common denominator. My GF asked me if I was "having fun" playing War Thunder, and I looked at her like she was a fucking retard to even consider that sentence a valid question. I don't have FUN playing War Thunder. This game routinely pisses me off and makes me rage. However, when I stomp the entire enemy team and crush them so utterly I can hear the lamentations of their mothers, I feel satisfaction. I spent weeks grinding for Operation Winter. The vikings had a word for this. They called it Valhalla. Endless war. Endless combat. Knowing only victory and death. Bathing in the blood of your enemies. You get 15 kills and bask in glory and rewards, and think: what should I do now? Should I get in my Honda Fit and tour the local strip mall for my Triumph? Should I microwave some tendies and throw myself a great Feast? But there is only one option. There is only ever one option. To Battle! Various cultures have alternatively described the gameplay loop of War Thunder as their vision of Heaven or Hell. It is both.
January 2021
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