[Copypasta] Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
March 2021
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

Bowling simulator: E-Bowler

twitchquotes: Hello my name is Kenneth Jizbombski, president of Viral Games, Inc. Recently sales of our most popular Bowling simulator "E-Bowler" have plummeted. Please help my small company by going out and getting E-Bowler any way that you can. I want E-Bowler to spread infecting people with it's incredible gameplay!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Kreygasm

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–„β– β–€β–’β–’β–’β–€β– β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–„β–„β–Œβ–’β–β–„β–„β–’β–β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–β–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014

Only the chosen can ride this beautiful elephant

twitchquotes: PogChamp only the chosen can ride this beautiful elephant RNCelephant
twitch chat
August 2016
Reynad

Copypasta jokes are not funny

twitchquotes: Copypasta jokes are not funny. It’s annoying and incredibly irritating to me when I say something in chat because I would enjoy actual responses and I instead get my own words thrown back at me. Please don't just copy my messages and be original! Thank you!
twitch chat
September 2019

Hi Tyler, this is the riot balance team

twitchquotes: Hi Tyler, this is the riot balance team contacting you due to your expertise in the game known as League of Legends. We wanted to invite you here, to riot studios, to singlehandedly write the code for the next big patch, rebalancing the game anyway you want! we know youre a much better player, coder, and balancer of games than we are. Thank YOU T1!!!
twitch chat
April 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing