[Copypasta] Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
March 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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Middle finger

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February 2021

Hey Chat Who Cares?

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⠶⣶⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⢀⠈⢿⢀⣀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀ HEY⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⠀⣟⡇⢘⣾⣽⠀⠀⡏⠉⠙⢛⣿⣷⡖⠀ CHAT⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⡿⠿⠷⠶⠤⠙⠒⠀⠒⢻⣿⣿⡷⠋⠀⠴⠞⠋⠁⢙⣿⣄ WHO⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣯⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢹⡄⠀⠀⠀⠛⠛⠋⠉⠹⡇ CARES⢸⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣼⣇⣀⣀⣀⣛⣛⣒⣲⢾⡷ ⢀⠤⠒⠒⢼⣿⣿⠶⠞⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⣼⠃ ⢮⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠻⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠁⠀⠉⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⣼⠃⠀ ⠈⠓⠶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠈⠒⢤⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⣀⣀⡠⠚⠁⠀⢀⡼⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣤⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣥⣤⣤⣤⣴⣟⠁
September 2020

Kermit the Frog and the Twin Towers

It is actual Muppets canon that Kermit the Frog, in some way, had a role in bringing down the Twin Towers in the terror attacks of September 11, 2001. In "It's a Very Muppets Christmas Movie," a film released in late 2002, Kermit is shown a glimpse of what New York City might look like if he had never been born. Among the scenery of this alternate reality NYC, we find none other than the Twin Towers proudly standing in the background. They were, of course, long destroyed in Kermit's normal reality. And yet, in the world without Kermit, the war on terror is missing its powder keg spark. Who would've thought that green piece of fuck could kermit a terror attack on US soil, but there it stands unimpeachable... We have concrete, canon proof of involvement. Why the world hasn't stopped and asked further questions is only further proof of a media cabal keeping this conversation away from the masses. The Twin Towers would still be standing if it weren't for Kermit the Frog. Al Qaeda was the puppet this time, and Kermit the hand within.
April 2022

Coke Gaming out!

twitchquotes: HI, this is Coke Gaming here In the Twitch stream of Aurateur. We would like to give you lots of money and gifted subscriptions, and maybe you can be on a platform-wide ad! Please be as loud and obnoxious as possible, the louder the reaction the better! Thank you for considering us. Coke Gaming out!
twitch chat
December 2019
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