Look at this shit, how come we can't ever invade a cool country, like chicks in bikinis, you know, how come countries like that don't ever need Marines, I'll tell you why, it's lack of pussy that fucks countries up, lack of pussy is the root fucking cause of all global instability, if more hajis were getting quality pussy, there'd be no reason for us to come over and fuck em up like this, cause a nutbusting haji, is a happy haji.
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Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old"
twitchquotes:
Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old," when I would NEVER call him "short and fat?" Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend - and maybe someday that will happen!
twitch chat
RNGesus pounds Reynad's sweet, supple orifice relentlessly
twitchquotes:
Hello fair maiden Reynad, this is the valiant knight Sir Coppus Pastaronus. I have come to rescue you from the mystical Tower of Salt, where the cruel innkeeper RNGesus has pounded your sweet, supple orifice relentlessly to the beat of Lord 
Please no paste.
Please no paste.
twitch chat
Reynad
Own a musket for home defense
twitchquotes:
Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
twitch chat
Intellectual simp for Pokimane
twitchquotes:
Hello, Miss Poki! I was scrolling through your page per usual and I happened to notice you take a plentiful amount of photos with your feet inframe and show them off quite a lot during streams. Is this on purpose? If so, please don't be embarrassed by my intellect! I think it is rather cute. I have subscribed to you for another month and was wondering if I could have secret access to some photos of your adorable soles? If not, I understand. You are a very busy woman and I am no more than a guy on the internet with a ravishingly high IQ might I add. Thank you for reading my message and have a wonderful day!
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Pokimane
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