[Copypasta] How come we can't ever invade a cool country (Generation Kill)

Look at this shit, how come we can't ever invade a cool country, like chicks in bikinis, you know, how come countries like that don't ever need Marines, I'll tell you why, it's lack of pussy that fucks countries up, lack of pussy is the root fucking cause of all global instability, if more hajis were getting quality pussy, there'd be no reason for us to come over and fuck em up like this, cause a nutbusting haji, is a happy haji.
March 2021
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hey there buddy chum pal friend

twitchquotes: hey there buddy chum pal friend buddy pal chum bud friend fella bruther amigo pal buddy friend chummy chum chum pal i don't mean to be rude my friend pal home slice bread slice dawg but i gotta warn ya if u take one more diddly darn step right there im going to have to diddly darn snap ur neck and wowza wouldn't that be a crummy juncture, huh? do yuo want that? do wish upon yourself to come into physical experience with a crummy juncture? because friend buddy chum friend chum pally pal chum friend if you keep this up well gosh diddly darn i just might have to get not so friendly with u my friendly friend friend pal friend buddy chum pally friend chum buddy...
twitch chat
October 2020

Classic

I spend all day working my ass off at the pasta factory

twitchquotes: I spend all day working my ass off at the pasta factory trying to provide pasta to hard-working people all across the world. After a long day of work, I come to Kripp's chat to unwind and have thought-driven discussions about my favorite game and favorite streamer. When I get here, however, all I see is pasta after pasta. All I want to do is escape my miserable life, but you fucks keep spamming.
twitch chat
March 2018

Classic

I hate Twitch Chat

Full Doge

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β– ░░░░░░░▐▄▀▒▒▀▀▀▀▄▄▄▀▒▒▒▒▒▐ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–’β– β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–’β–’β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–€β–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β– β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–Œ β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œ β–Œβ–’β–€β–β–„β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–„β–‘β–€β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β– β–β–’β–’β–β–€β–β–€β–’β–‘β–„β–„β–’β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œ ▐▒▒▒▀▀▄▄▒▒▒▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░▒░▒░▒▒▐ β–‘β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–Œ ░▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░▒░▒░▒▒▄▒▒▐ β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–’β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–€ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–€ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€
November 2016

So I’m an AMC shareholder

So I’m an AMC shareholder, which means I own some of the business. Because the stock kept getting halted today I decided to go to my local AMC and support the stock by buying some concessions. I went up to the stand and told the casher (his nametag said Melvin) that I was a shareholder and wanted to support the business. He looked excited and told me to close my eyes and hold out my hand for a surprise shareholder treat. I can’t believe it, but he just covered my hands in liquid butter! Now I’m typing this at home and cant get it off my hands, and my keyboard is all greasy typing this, What do I do?
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Obama Not Bad

β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–β–€β–€β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘ β–β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β•β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β•β•β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–‘β–„β–€β–Œβ–Œ β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œ β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–‘β–Œβ–Œ β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–€β–β–β–‘ β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–€β–β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–„β•β•β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–Œβ–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„ β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
July 2015
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