[Copypasta] How come we can't ever invade a cool country (Generation Kill)

Look at this shit, how come we can't ever invade a cool country, like chicks in bikinis, you know, how come countries like that don't ever need Marines, I'll tell you why, it's lack of pussy that fucks countries up, lack of pussy is the root fucking cause of all global instability, if more hajis were getting quality pussy, there'd be no reason for us to come over and fuck em up like this, cause a nutbusting haji, is a happy haji.
March 2021
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Valiant calls Shanghai

twitchquotes: HELLO SHANGHAI 📞 4Head IT'S THE VALIANT 📞 4Head WE'LL TAKE IT FROM HERE 📞 4Head
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game of doctor

when i was like 12 my neighbor invited me over and we played a game called “doctor” basically he took his pants off got fully erect and asked me to examine it. don’t even remember what happened after that. anyways BFT to the moon
January 2021

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PepeLaugh

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⢟⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⠤⠐⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠒⠬⡣⠤⠤⠄⠄⠄⠤⠤⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⢀⡒⠤⠭⠅⠚⣓⡆⡆⣔⡙⠓⠚⠛⠄⣹⠿⣿ ⣿⠟⠁⡌⠄⠄⠄⢀⠤⠬⠐⣈⠠⡤⠤⠤⣤⠤⢄⡉⢁⣀⣠⣤⣤⣀⣐⡖⢦⣽ ⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠄⡿⠛⠯⠍⠭⣉⣉⠉⠍⢀⢀⡀⠉⠉⠉⠒⠒⠂⠄⣻ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠩⠵⠒⠒⠲⢒⡢⡉⠁⢐⡀⠬⠍⠁⢉⣉⣴⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⢉⣒⡉⠁⠁⠄⠄⠉⠂⠙⣉⣁⣀⣙⡿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⠄⡖⢉⠥⢤⠐⢲⠒⢲⠒⢲⠒⠲⡒⠒⡖⢲⠂⠄⢀⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢆⡑⢄⠳⢾⠒⢺⠒⢺⠒⠚⡖⠄⡏⠉⣞⠞⠁⣠⣾⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢆⠄⠄⠄⠈⠢⠉⠢⠍⣘⣒⣚⣒⣚⣒⣒⣉⠡⠤⣔⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⠷⣤⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠈⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠉⠐⠢⠭⠄⢀⣒⣒⡒⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⡠⠶⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠁⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
December 2018

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Ahoy matey, I bring ye much love

twitchquotes: (◕‿X✿) Ahoy matey, I bring ye much love. Y'arr be beautiful inside and out, and ye best know that ye matter so much and everythin' ya do plunders my booty in an amazin' way YARHARHAR. (◕‿X✿)
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May 2019

I’ve been wondering if I might be a gay

Recently, I’ve been wondering if I might be a gay. It all started a week ago. I was sitting on the toilet, pooping, when all of a sudden, a big shit turd comes out of my ass. It was huge. Big big. It’s so fucking big, I gotta look down into the toilet to check for blood. No blood, but the turd is fucking massive. I notice something strange about it. The end of the turd, sticking out of the water, looks like a dick head. A penis head. Needless to say, I was concerned. How could this be? I picked it up from the water, and put it back up my ass. To my surprise, it felt good. I then shit it back into the water. Splash. I then repeated this a few more times, moaning out “Oscar Winning actor Anthony Hopkins” each time. I am not sure if I am now gay. My boyfriend says it’s completely normal, but he’s gay, so I can’t trust him.
May 2021
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