I want to fuck a cheeseburger. Just having that cheesy goodness melt all around my cock would make me feel at ease with the world again. Being able to cum inside a dead cow makes me feel so alive. I have been banned from 231 McDonald’s for public masturbation. Whenever I see an ad for McDonald’s I get so fucking horny. God I want to fuck a cheeseburger.
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Greetings r/atheism
Greetings, my fellow intellectually superior comrades. I too am an enjoyer of the fedora as well as intellectual matters and enlightenment. I am very pleased to find a space like this where intellects like me can laugh at normie th*ests and jerk off to rule 34 Rick and Morty images like the true sigma Chads we are. Truly a shame that normie sites like Instascam and Crapchat do not possess the intellectual capacity of people like us.
That reminds me of a story involving one of my proudest accomplishments. I remember the reason why I got fired from my old job as a scrub, and it is truly a brave, bold, and intellectual moment that I am sure you all will be proud of. So I was doing my rounds at the hospital I was working at and someone's newborn baby has just died form birth complications. Everyone was crying and the mother's parents had assured her that the baby was "in Heaven" and "with God". (cringe, right?) Well I heard this utter nonsense through the hallway and I figured that it was my duty to put these ignoramus th* ists in their place. So I walked into the room and said straight to their faces "but God isn't real and neither is Heaven you normie th* ists. Heaven is a fairy tale made up by a book written 1,000 years ago in a desert by wannabe fantasy writers. Your sky daddy isn't real, and your baby isn't in Heaven because Heaven isn't real either. It's just all black for him like it was before he was convinced in your room. Go read 'the God delusion' by Richard Dawkins, maybe you'll grow a few brain cells." Everyone was shocked, the lady started crying and her parents and husband started yelling at me. The others were just speechless, their months agape. But I wasn't phased, it only made me proud becuase I know that when the th*ists are seething, I am right. So eventually someone must have reported me becuase a day after I got fired for "unprofessionalism and harassment". Ha! More like the simpleton folks cannot understand the intelligence of freethinkers like me, and get mad at those who tell the truth and reality check their delusion of their skydaddy. I didn't care tho. Geniuses are rarely recognized as such in their time. One day they'll look back in history and see that what I did there as well as all the other things I did were revolutionary! I can find a job with more intellectual employers anyway. I was proud to be fired for speaking the truth!
Either way, I'm happy to be here, and I'm happy to destroy some skydaddy cock sucking th*ests. Also an updoot on this post would very much be appreciated and wholesome.
Edit: I said UPDOOT, not DOWNDOOT! God, are you just as dumb as the th*ists now???
I Am Very Smart
NOW WE MUTINY!
twitchquotes:
~~~~~~~[]=¤ԅ[✖Ĺ̯ಠ]╯ AND NOW WE MUTINY! ~~~~~~~[]=¤ԅ[✖Ĺ̯ಠ]/
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Reynad
୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨ riot ୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨
Subbin to MingLee when his emote is free
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subbing 
to Scarra when his emote is free
to Scarra when his emote is free
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Scarra
Let us out lettuce points
twitchquotes:
Lettuce (Lactuca sativa) was first discovered by Octavian Morosan in 2019. A leafy, green vegatable, he named it lettuce after the frantic cries from his wife and two dogs chained in the basement of, "Let us out!"
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Kripp
A chef explaining why air fryers are a scam on r/unpopularopinion
As a chef, it’s an insult to hear “air fryers are as good as frying”. Air fryers are fucking bullshit scams and are just convection ovens with an extra fan added.
Seriously, pan searing or regular baking will always be better. I swear to shit Jared if I hear you compare fried chicken to air fried chicken one more time I’m gonna smack the gob out of you.
Edit: I’m in danger, I never realized how deep the air fryer fandom goes. I will die on this hill
Edit2: I’ll never stop upvoting and loving you all but… but I’m just gonna go cry about something totally different..
Edit3: i think id be a lot less upset if it was called an “extra air oven” as its a convection oven with extra fans.
Edit4: if I had a dollar for every comment “you clearly don’t own an air fryer” I’d be able to put it towards a new toaster oven.
Edit5: the chances of getting doxxed over kitchen appliances isn’t high.. but never zero.
Edit6: apparently air fryers are taking my job? Sorry boys and girls, no more foi gras for the rich.